Jan 17, 2006 17:40
My days have been okay lately. Not great just okay.
I don't really know what to say.
I hate being alone for one thing, like right now. I just wan't to go outside in the wind and cold and walk around a lake or something with someone. I don't know it feels so perfect. But instead I will be sitting here in my house with no one.
I wan't my birthday to come. 9 days away. I wan't to feel older, more of an importance, sorta. And I wan't to be able to drive, go where I please and do the stupid little things like go walk around a lake when I want to. That would be 42 days away.
Everyday is so slow.
I just wan't to find my place in life, like know what I am suppose to accomplish.
Like I am happy in all but still.
I want my old memories back, but I have to say that I do love the new ones.
Humm the one thing that I have used 90% of all my wishes on came true on Saturday. I have to say that it was absolutely amazing. Although I have to say that it did tear my heart a bit more than it already was. I just love him so much. I don't know what to do with myself when i'm not with him. I just don't feel right. Nothing feels right. And there's not one second of the day that I don't think of him.
Humm, what can I say. Lifes difficult.