now and then
wendelah1 gave me 26.
Then
I lived in: either the flat on bourke st or the one on william street.
I drove: nothing. cars bad, public transport good.
I was in a relationship with: mr tree. we'd just gotten married a few months before i turned 26. at that point we were engaged in the endless battle with bureaucracy that was trying to get his residency visa.
I feared: being crazy forever. living a long time.
I worked at: a distance education college. the pay was terrible and it was, frankly, kind of dodgy, but it got me out of retail.
I wanted to be: dead, most days. happy, on other days.
Now
I live in: the same crappy flat we've lived in for ten years. i am so over it.
I drive: nothing. cars bad, public transport good.
I am in a relationship with: mr tree. now we've been married for twelve years. twelve and a half, to be more accurate. it's so weird.
I fear: living a long time. my body crapping out on me more. i'm mostly resigned to the crazy but i do fear it getting worse. i also fear the inevitable things like mum's death and mr tree's. and i fear outliving both of them and also being unable to kill myself.
I work at: it occurs to me that i've never actually talked about where i work now, but it's the same place i've been working for six years. i have a desk and my computer is named tallulah. that's as much as i'm comfortable saying outside a locked entry.
I want to be: happy, most days. dead, on other days. so i guess that's progress.
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