we must always try, try with all our might.
Chicago was amazing.
For some reason, it felt so good to be there. Maybe it's because I was way stressed out, or maybe it's something more. I don't know. And I won't until I change things.
For me, decisions are made easily. I think them over, sure, but ultimately, it's either I do or I don't. Do you want to do this? Yes, I do. Then I do it, consequences pending. I'll wait for my punishment to come because it always comes, then I'll move on. But now, these decisions I'm making are far different. I could be the one hurt in the end and all because I was too caught up to walk away before further destruction occurred. I can be stubborn that way I guess. My problem is that I always want to stick around to see how things turn out...even if I know in my gut that they'll be bad. I just want to know.
This thing that is happening right now is very difficult. I know what I'm going to do but I don't agree with myself...if that makes sense at all. I know I'm going to stick around even though I feel that the outcome of the situation might not be beneficial for me. Oh well. C'est la vie.
For now, I'm going to go to my sisters (the one I haven't spoken to) and we're going to have dinner and see a movie...I'm thinking Halloween...even though it'll probably be pretty bad...that's ok. Then tomorrow I am going to Cedar Point (my most favorite place on earth) and I'm going to forget all about my troubles whilst screaming my lungs out on the top of Millennium Force. Then, I will come back and face reality...work, school, and the big issues.
For some reason, it felt so good to be there. Maybe it's because I was way stressed out, or maybe it's something more. I don't know. And I won't until I change things.
For me, decisions are made easily. I think them over, sure, but ultimately, it's either I do or I don't. Do you want to do this? Yes, I do. Then I do it, consequences pending. I'll wait for my punishment to come because it always comes, then I'll move on. But now, these decisions I'm making are far different. I could be the one hurt in the end and all because I was too caught up to walk away before further destruction occurred. I can be stubborn that way I guess. My problem is that I always want to stick around to see how things turn out...even if I know in my gut that they'll be bad. I just want to know.
This thing that is happening right now is very difficult. I know what I'm going to do but I don't agree with myself...if that makes sense at all. I know I'm going to stick around even though I feel that the outcome of the situation might not be beneficial for me. Oh well. C'est la vie.
For now, I'm going to go to my sisters (the one I haven't spoken to) and we're going to have dinner and see a movie...I'm thinking Halloween...even though it'll probably be pretty bad...that's ok. Then tomorrow I am going to Cedar Point (my most favorite place on earth) and I'm going to forget all about my troubles whilst screaming my lungs out on the top of Millennium Force. Then, I will come back and face reality...work, school, and the big issues.