probabile nutso

[trayfnyak]

There is no reason for me to be posting today. I have nothing to say that passes blogmuster, really. I might go ahead, though, and let everyone know that I have given up coffee. I had to, for caffeine in moderate to high amounts turns my intenstine into a burning track of kerosene. Yes, I have the "chick disease" known as IBS. I drink a cup of tea

Comments

In Solidarity: A Story That Is Less Sad Than Yours

[pendulous]

My senior year at ACU I found that my frequent bouts with heartburn were beginning to influence all aspects of my daily routine. I thought I had an ulcer.

I went to the doctor and the doctor said:
"hmm . . . uh huh, mmm . . . yes. uhmm yeeesss."
I wasn't sure if he was responding to my description of symptoms or just really enjoying his Charleston Chew.

Then the person who is not a doctor but is responsible for performing most doctorly duties explained to me that I had Gastro-Esophageal Reflux Disease; commonly referred to as "GERD."
They gave me a several sample boxes of one of those purple pills which I began taking that week.
The pills worked, but after a month I'd run out and the symptoms came back.
By this time my dad's insurance was no longer interested in me, so I bought a pack of Rolaids and suffered through.

After about two years of cyclical bouts with discomfort and at least one more doctor visit, I moved to Nashville.
I was unemployed and living with vegetarians, so, inevitably, my diet changed.
And my heartburn all but disappeared.

It was then that it occurred to me that both times I'd been to the doctor, nobody had asked me anything about what I was eating. More specifically, nobody had asked "are you eating at Taco Bueno more than 5 times a week". If they had, the answer would have been a guilty and evasive "maybe".

I came out of this experience with a sort of agnosticism about both my "disease" and the purple pill industry at large.
That is to say, I'm not really sure if I believe in GERD, but if there is a GERD (and there may well be) I don't think that the real GERD has much to do with the one the educated men talk about or that the masses buy into. Either way, I don't think that I should live my life as though GERD is going to "get me" if I don't buy the right pills and have the right insurance, and GERD is pretty far from the top of my list of pressing concerns.

This story doesn't have a lot to do with yours,
and now that I read through it, I realise I may have told it to you before.
But I still like to tell it because it is punny and evokes images of monkeys jumping on a bed.

Congrats on getting off the sauce.
I know it's not easy, but if your intestines won't promptly thank you, I will.

Bargain Hunters Burn Howler Monkeys

[trayfnyak]

I'm responding to this because it's clear that we are both -- whether we like it or not -- afflicted with palpable bowel disorders. Had God mentioned the colon, small intestine, or anything truly specific in the Book of Genesis, then perhaps we would be having better luck, less discomfort. But perhaps when we die, and if God overlooks the above complaint, then we will be shown (using angelic graph charts and timelines) how the industrial production of cheap foodstuffs was always the true culprit in rending our guts asunder.

In the meantime, Pendulous, I recommend a daily dose of two FiberCon pills and a reckless courage in the face of public restrooms. And lots of beer, but not before bedtime.