what i can't help but think is...
when am i ever going to really want to like a person for who they really are and not worry desperately that one of us will change our minds and it's all kind of pointless. but the worst part of this whole thought process is the sickness i feel towards myself for even being so juvenile to fret over relationships...and shit like that.
and a certain special reader: I really am doing fine up here, and i thank you for your thoughts. i may seem different to you from so very far away but if you let me in close you'd see i'm exactly the same as i've always been. i do miss the good ol' days, just because this new life is overwhelming doesn't mean i could ever forget them.