Big Bang Theory/Psych: Thursday (Sheldon, Gus; G; ~450w).
Sheldon, Gus; G; ~450w.
College roommates (ie, if Gus went to Meitner) AU. Sheldon's routine is thrown off.
Thursday
"What's the matter?" Burton asked.
"What's the matter? What's the matter?" Sheldon pointed a trembling arm at the cafeteria food display. "Thursday is meatloaf day. Thursday has always been meatloaf day. And yet, here I stand, and there is lasagna in the food dispensing trays and no meatloaf to be found."
"Right," Burton said, looking like he still didn't quite get it.
"Don't you see? Tuesday is lasagna day. My God, man, I just ate lasagna two days ago -- I'm probably still digesting the lasagna I ate on Tuesday, if my tastebud contact-based analysis of the constituent ingredients is correct, and I -- and I -- I."
"Hey," Burton said. "It's okay."
"No, it's not. Because there's supposed to be. It's. Today's." Sheldon made an inarticulate noise of frustration. His breath was shaky and his hands clenched into fists.
"I am going to place my hand on your upper back, now," Burton said calmly, narrating his actions as he took them. "I will be steering you out into the hall now, yes, very good. We are walking down the hallway, here we go, nodding hello to our fellow classmates -- hello, Natasha, hello, Giorgio -- and we are continuing to walk, and, ah. Here we are. We have arrived at the lavatory." Burton stopped walking and looked Sheldon in the eye. "Are you comfortable entering the lavatory with me, Sheldon?"
Sheldon nodded, tightly.
"I am now opening the door to the lavatory, here we go, we're walking through it, and now we're entering the first stall. If you would be so kind as to stand there while I sterilize our environment?"
Sheldon, breathing a little easier, nodded again.
Burton slipped his hand into his pocket, pulling out a pair of latex gloves. He then withdrew a packet of sanitizing wipes and proceeded to wipe down the metal bars along the walls, the toilet seat, the toilet cover, and every available surface around them.
Sheldon swallowed, carefully pointing one finger. "You missed a spot."
Burton crouched down, looking where Sheldon had pointed. He smiled widely. "So I did. Thank you very much, Sheldon."
"I must commend you on your highly efficient use of sparse materials to cover such a daunting surface area."
Burton inclined his head, wiping the last spot, and then tossed the last wipe into the garbage can. "The lavatory is a man's sanctuary. And I like my sanctuaries to be spic-and-span, you know what I mean?"
Sheldon huffed. "Do I ever."
"So," Burton said, leaning against the newly-disinfected metal bar. "You want to tell me about it?"
"No," Sheldon said.
"Works for me," Burton said. "Here, grab some toilet paper. We still have to do the floors."
Sheldon tore off twenty squares, folding them over exactly three times, and they got to work.
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College roommates (ie, if Gus went to Meitner) AU. Sheldon's routine is thrown off.
Thursday
"What's the matter?" Burton asked.
"What's the matter? What's the matter?" Sheldon pointed a trembling arm at the cafeteria food display. "Thursday is meatloaf day. Thursday has always been meatloaf day. And yet, here I stand, and there is lasagna in the food dispensing trays and no meatloaf to be found."
"Right," Burton said, looking like he still didn't quite get it.
"Don't you see? Tuesday is lasagna day. My God, man, I just ate lasagna two days ago -- I'm probably still digesting the lasagna I ate on Tuesday, if my tastebud contact-based analysis of the constituent ingredients is correct, and I -- and I -- I."
"Hey," Burton said. "It's okay."
"No, it's not. Because there's supposed to be. It's. Today's." Sheldon made an inarticulate noise of frustration. His breath was shaky and his hands clenched into fists.
"I am going to place my hand on your upper back, now," Burton said calmly, narrating his actions as he took them. "I will be steering you out into the hall now, yes, very good. We are walking down the hallway, here we go, nodding hello to our fellow classmates -- hello, Natasha, hello, Giorgio -- and we are continuing to walk, and, ah. Here we are. We have arrived at the lavatory." Burton stopped walking and looked Sheldon in the eye. "Are you comfortable entering the lavatory with me, Sheldon?"
Sheldon nodded, tightly.
"I am now opening the door to the lavatory, here we go, we're walking through it, and now we're entering the first stall. If you would be so kind as to stand there while I sterilize our environment?"
Sheldon, breathing a little easier, nodded again.
Burton slipped his hand into his pocket, pulling out a pair of latex gloves. He then withdrew a packet of sanitizing wipes and proceeded to wipe down the metal bars along the walls, the toilet seat, the toilet cover, and every available surface around them.
Sheldon swallowed, carefully pointing one finger. "You missed a spot."
Burton crouched down, looking where Sheldon had pointed. He smiled widely. "So I did. Thank you very much, Sheldon."
"I must commend you on your highly efficient use of sparse materials to cover such a daunting surface area."
Burton inclined his head, wiping the last spot, and then tossed the last wipe into the garbage can. "The lavatory is a man's sanctuary. And I like my sanctuaries to be spic-and-span, you know what I mean?"
Sheldon huffed. "Do I ever."
"So," Burton said, leaning against the newly-disinfected metal bar. "You want to tell me about it?"
"No," Sheldon said.
"Works for me," Burton said. "Here, grab some toilet paper. We still have to do the floors."
Sheldon tore off twenty squares, folding them over exactly three times, and they got to work.
[[ dreamwidth entry | reply @ dw |
comments ]]