Truth or Dare (fic)
*None of this is true. its merely a fan fic, written years ago*
Pairing: Mikey and Gerard Way.
Gerard Way’s point of view
“Gerard, truth or dare?” Frank asked me backstage after our Chicago concert.
“Dare,” I answered confidently, unaware of what was coming.
“I dare you to make out with Mikey,” Frank replied.
I looked over at my baby brother. His straight, sandy blonde hair was plastered to his face, slightly tucked in his glasses. His Anthrax shirt hugged his torso and his tight jeans fit his lower half perfectly.
“Okay,” I said after a moments thought. I moved toward Mikey. I tilted my head to the right. Mikey went left. Our lips joined and my tongue entered his mouth. As our tongues were battling and our band mates hollering I realized that I was enjoying the kiss more than I should have been. Finally after several minutes of kissing, Mikey pulled away. I felt my face get red. I smiled at Mikey and he smiled back.
“That was well worth it!” Frank exclaimed, obviously pleased at what he had just done.
As Ray, Bob, Frank, and Brian, our manager, continued clapping I looked over at my younger brother. He looked radiant. I wanted him and I really hoped he wanted me. We’re both gay and we’re open about it but dating a sibling is wrong. I can’t love Mikey and yet I want to be with him more than anything.
Chapter 1
It’s been over a week since my former love, Frank, dared me to kiss me new love, Mikey. We’ve been on tour for months now and we still have another 2 months to go. The bus has reached its disgusting state. All our clothes are filthy and are scattered in various areas. The bus and our bodies now reek of dirty socks and rotten eggs. Despite the filth, Mikey couldn’t be more beautiful. Every pore on his body and every blemish on his face is sheer beauty. It is now 4 am, Friday morning. We just passed a sign that read “Welcome to Las Vegas.” Seeing as we’re in Vegas, “what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas,” I’ve made a conscience decision to declare my love to Mikey as soon as we check into the hotel.
My eyes wondered over to Mikey’s bunk. He lay there sleeping silently in nothing but surfer shorts. His glasses sit next to his head that rest on his yellowed pillow that he’s had since we were young. I smile at just the sight of him.
The rest of my exhausted band mates were also sleeping. Ray was peacefully crashed face down, his afro absorbing his entire head. Bob lay there, mouth wide open, with a Playboy magazine collapsed on his chest. My ex love Frank was fast asleep with his ipod still attached to his ears. He’s a beautiful guy and I’m truly sorry that we didn’t work but now I have a new focus, Mikey.
Suddenly the bus came to a violent stop. Everybody shot up in their bunks, Bob hitting his head. After taking a few minutes to dress we went into the Palms Hotel and checked in. We got our room keys and headed to our rooms. Thankfully, Mikey insisted on sharing a room with me but unfortunately the rest of the guys had rooms on an entirely different floor! Mikey and I grabbed our bags, got in the elevator, and entered room 361. It was time for me to confess my feelings.
“Mikey, I need to tell you something,” I started. My knees were weak.
“Alright, what is it?” He asked innocently. He began hanging up our clothes in the closet.
“Remember last week when Frank dared me to make out with you?” I continued. My stomach was also feeling weak. Mikey raised his eyebrow curiously.
“Uh huh,” he replied suspiciously. I took and released a deep breath and walked toward him.
“Umm that kiss was more than just a dare. Mikey, I think I’m in love with you,” I confessed with bad wording.
“What? NO, don’t even say that!” Mikey screamed and ran from the room. I ran after him, determined to talk it over.
Chapter 2
“Mikey, you have to talk to me,” I said when I caught up to Mikey. He stopped by a vending machine and looked at me with a sad expression smothering his face. His eyes were heartbreaking.
“Frank Iero is a sick bastard!” Mikey declared.
“What?” I said struggling to catch my breath. I’m a bit out of shape but that’s beside the point. I was slightly confused about Mikey’s accusation about the guy I used to be in love with.
“Frank told you that I’m head over heals in love with you and then put you up to this sick joke didn’t he?” Mikey shouted. My jaw dropped in shock.
“What are you talking about? Frank hasn’t told me anything!” I defended both myself and Frank.
“He didn’t?” Mikey asked embarrassed.
“No, and if he had I wouldn’t have played a joke like that on you. Mikey, what I said is 100% true,” I said taking his small frame in mine.
“Well I feel ridiculous but I’m glad you feel the same way,” he said pulling me into and even tighter embrace. As I was rubbing his back I felt him kiss my neck.
“Let’s go back to our room,” I suggested. He nodded. I took his hand in mine and we walked back to our room.
Chapter 3
By the time we reached the room I was giving Mikey a piggy back ride while he was sucking my neck. I opened the door to our hotel room and walked in.
“Shower?” I asked letting Mikey down.
“Fuck yeah,” he replied racing me to the bathroom.
We quickly undressed ourselves. I’ve always known Mikey was thin but I never realized just how thin he really is! I scanned his body and let my eyes rest on his package for a moment. His eyes were also latched on mine.
I went over and turned on the shower. As I bent over Mikey slapped my bare ass. I grabbed his hand and pulled him into the steamy shower. I immediately jerked him under the hot water and pulled him into a firm hug. I felt his erection against mine. I started kissing him passionately and moved my kisses to his neck, torso and thigh. I stopped before I reached his genitals. I looked up at Mikey, who seemed hesitant.
“Gerard, know that I’m a virgin,” he stated. To be honest I was shocked but yet relieved.
“That’s fine. We don’t have to do this,” I said bluntly.
“No, I want to Gee,” he snapped back.
“I’ll stop at any point you want me to,” I answered the petite boy.
“Okay but for now, please continue,” Mikey begged.
I proceeded, putting my attention back on Mikey’s member. I took a deep breath and started blowing on his penis. His erection grew slightly larger. I enjoyed teasing him.
“Ahh Gerard, you have to do something. It hurts!” Mikey pleaded.
He put his hands in my hair and began caressing my head. I started kissing Mikey’s aching member, making him incredibly needy. I placed my mouth over his groin and began sucking. I felt him hit the back of my throat, making me realize just how big he really is!
“Ahh fuck Gee,” Mikey exclaimed. I felt him release himself in my mouth. I swallowed it greedily and removed my mouth from his package. I placed my hand on his scrotum and placed a gentle kiss on the tip of his penis.
“Better?” I asked sarcastically.
“Yeah but could we continue?” he asked innocently.
I stood up and placed 2 fingers at his mouth.
“Suck bro,” I demanded. He quickly began sucking my fingers. After a few seconds of sucking I pulled my fingers from his mouth and placed one at Mikey’s entrance.
“My 1st time was painful. I’m just warning you,” I cautioned.
“I don’t give a fuck,” Mikey argued. I slowly entered my finger. I looked at Mikey.
“Okay?” I asked. Mikey nodded and I entered a second finger.
I made a scissoring motion inside of him. He winced in pain. I stopped and looked my baby brother. I didn’t want to hurt him.
“It kills but continue,” he stated. I nodded and did the scissoring motion a few more times and then removed my fingers.
“Are you positive?” I asked making sure he was ready.
“Fuck yeah,” he said impatiently. I placed my member at Mikey’s entrance and slowly began inserting myself into him. Mikey screamed in pain.
“It gets better baby,” I promised. He gave a simple nod and I started thrusting into him slowly.
“Harder Gee,” Mikey demanded. I picked up speed. I was randomly switching directions determined to find his prostate.
”Ahh Fuck Gee,” he screamed. I found it easily! My member was close to exploding now.
“Mikey, I’m cumming,” I announced as I released myself into him. After I was done filling his insides I removed myself from him and brought him into an embrace.
“Was is worth the pain?” I asked. He winced.
“Yeah but Gerard it still hurts,” he answered. I immediately got concerned and crouched down to examine his entrance.
“You’re a bit torn hun,” I said remorsefully. He had a few drops of blood dripping from him. I proceeded to clean him up with my mouth. He winced again.
“You should be alright now,” I said after I was done.
I stood up and kissed him passionately, our tongues colliding.
“Let’s go relax before the show,” I suggested. Mikey nodded.
“I love you,” he said. I said it back and helped him out of the shower.
We walked back into our room entirely naked.
“Wow like this doesn’t say something,” a voice from inside the room said. I looked up stunned at who was standing before us.
“Frank?” I said shocked.
Chapter 4
“You’re one hell of a guy Gerard,” Frank started as I quickly handed Mikey a towel to cover himself. To be quite honest I didn’t care if Frank seen me nude because we were together for 3 years so he’s seen everything but he has no right to be viewing Mikey’s private parts.
I was speechless but Frank had a lot to say.
“You left Bert for me and now you left me for your own flesh and blood! Gerard that’s sick, especially when you know that I still have deep feelings for you! Frank stated harshly.
“Yeah I left Bert for you but I left you because all the fights weren’t worth the sex! It’s just recently that I’ve started having feelings for Mikey. I had no idea that you still have feelings for me which is cool I guess because I think you’re a great guy,” I defended.
I looked over at Mikey who was now fully dressed. He handed me a pair of jeans and a shirt as Frank continued yelling at me.
“You think I’m a great guy. I think you’re the most phenomenal human being to ever walk on this earth! Let’s get back together, be happy, have the hot sex we used to enjoy every night and give the fans a Ferard reunion,” Frank said enthusiastically.
I looked at Mikey. He had a single tear streaming down his right cheek. I walked over, wiped the tear away and kissed him softly.
“You’re the one baby,” I whispered and moved back towards Frank.
“Frank, it’s not that simple,” I started.
“Why the hell not?” he asked, anger rising from his nerves. For being such a small guy he’s really intimidating.
“Because...” I started but was cut off by Frank.
“It’s me or him. You pick me I will be the happiest tattooed freak alive. You pick him and the band is done!” Frank said giving me an ultimatum.
My choice was obvious. It was going to be heartbreaking but I knew it had to be done!
Chapter 5
“Frank, I’m sorry. I love the band but I love Mikey more,” I thought to myself.
I closed my eyes hoping Frank’s ultimatum was a dream.
“You have to give me time to think,” I answered.
Mikey looked shocked. His expression said “is this even a choice?”
“Ok fine. You have until right before we go onstage tonight!” Frank said in an annoyed tone. I looked at the clock. It read 3:00pm.
“3 hours?” I asked, shocked at how fast the day had gone.
“Yup, and I’m sure your choice will be made by then!” Frank said treating me as a child. He left the room slamming the door forcefully behind him.
“He’s being such a jerk,” I said stating the obvious. I walked over to Mikey.
“I know babe but what’s your decision?” he asked as I sat on his lap wrapping my arms around his neck.
“Fuck the band. My decision is to be with you!” I exclaimed. My hand was now wondering around Mikey’s body. I kissed his cheek.
“Are you sure? The band is your baby,” Mikey said softly.
“We’ve had a good run with My Chem. We’re all growing up and you’re my baby now,” I replied in Mikey’s ear. At that point I was sick of being serious so I shoved Mikey on his back and began tickling his flesh.
“Ah ha ha ha ha that tickles baby,” Mikey laughed.
“That’s the point,” I chuckled out. We were rolling around on the bed and eventually rolled ourselves off the bed. Our tickling fun came to a crashing end when we hit the floor. I noticed that Mikey’s head hit the bedside table.
“Are you okay?” I asked concerned.
“Yeah I’m fine,” Mikey replied as I helped him up. I went over to my bag and grabbed Aspirin.
“Take this,” I said handing him 2 pills and bottled water. He swallowed it down easily.
“Thanks Gerard,” he said gratefully. I nodded and then kissed him lightly.
“We gotta head to the stadium for the show. Grab your shit so we can go meet Brian and the guys in the lobby,” I directed. Mikey grabbed his stuff and followed me out the door. We met up with Brian and the guys, all except Frank.
“Where’s Frank?” I asked trying to act like nothing happened.
“He’s on the bus already. He’s really pissed off, almost in tears actually,” Brian informed.
“Hmm I wonder why?” Mikey said giving me a strange look. I felt awful. I didn’t know Frank was that upset. The rest of us filed onto the bus. I noticed Frank laying in his bunk, ipod on his ears and tears streaming down his face. Bob went over to talk to him. Bob has always been good to vent on.
I just sat down by Mikey and tried to enjoy the ride. A few minutes of driving and we were at the stadium. We all quickly moved from the bus to the stadium trying to avoid all the crazy fans. We went backstage and got ready. Right was I finished putting on my white makeup Brian entered.
“You guys ready because ya got 2 minutes,” he announced.
Frank approached me. I got a sick feeling in my stomach.
“What’s your decision?” he asked bluntly. I took a deep breath.
“Sorry but I choose Mikey,” I said apologetically.
“Guys you’re on,” Brian said while pushing us on stage.
“Band’s over. I hate you,” Frank said as he ran out to perform our final show.
Chapter 6
“I don’t care how much you invest yourself in me,
We’re not working out
And you can’t touch my brother
And you can’t keep my friends” I sang during our final song, Vampires.
As I was singing Frank began moving towards Mikey. I got a bit suspicious but I had to keep performing.
“Well I choose this life I’ve taken
Never mind the friends I’m making,” I sang.
Just as the word “making” was sung Frank nailed Mikey in the balls, making him fall in pain and making me go off on Frank. I whipped the microphone down and ran after him. He threw his guitar down and came after me.
I punched him in the side of the face and he proceeded to kick me in the groin, which I’m sadly getting used to.
After Frank kicked me I was on the floor and he hopped his 140-something pound frame on top of me. We were beating the shit out of each other. I had his blood on my flesh and he had mine on his.
Ray came over and started pulling us apart. The security guards were escorting fans safely out of the venue and Bob was tending to Mikey. Ray was unsuccessful at ending the fight and I’m pretty sure he was hit a few times.
As Frank continued hitting me, I looked over to the side of the stage. Worm and the other security guards were rushing on the stage. They yanked us off of each other and that’s when the verbal fighting began.
“You’ve not only ruined the band but you ruined our last show!” I screamed and then coughed up blood.
“You broke my fucking heart. How do you think it felt having to perform knowing that you no longer want me?” Frank yelled at me.
That must have been hard but he told me that he hated me which was just as hard to accept.
“I understand that must have been difficult but you have to understand that I have no sexual interest in you anymore! You no longer mean anything to me. I’ve moved on and maybe you should too!” I said lowering my voice.
“I’ve never heard such cruel words come from anybody’s mouth. I’m heartbroken that you feel that way,” Frank replied while tears ran from his bloodshot eyes.
I was beyond speechless. Frank walked off the stage not bothering to say another word. As the fact that the band was over was sinking in I stood staring blankly at the empty stage. Everything I worked so hard to achieve has just been ripped away.
Chapter 7
Suddenly I felt 2 arms being wrapped around my waist.
“Are you alright bro?” Mikey asked. He laid his head on my shoulder.
“MCR’s is done. Frank hates me and yet I think things will be okay,” I said. I coughed as Mikey kissed my neck.
“Are you okay?” I asked knowing how much Frank’s kicks hurt.
“I’m fine, just upset that you fought him and that the band is done,” He said and then pointed to the side of the stage where Brian stood.
“Frank explained what happened. I’m happy for you 2 but it’s a shame that things went down that way,” he said walking towards us.
“It is a shame but we can’t do anything about it now,” I said softly.
“Too bad,” Brian said handing me 2 plane tickets.
“Frank’s already on a plane to LA. Bob and Ray leave tomorrow morning for Chicago. You guys leave in an hour for Belleville. We got all your things packed and put them in your car,” Brain added. I felt my eyes swell up.
“It’s been a pleasure to work with you guys,” he continued. Mikey pulled Brian into a 3-person hug with me.
“You’re a good guy. Take care of yourself,” Mikey told Brian.
“Keep in touch. We love ya,” I through in. Brian pulled himself from the hug.
“I love all of you guys so don’t hesitate to call if ya need something,” Brian concluded.
He walked off the stage.
“We will,” Mikey and I said in unison.
“Let’s go,” I said and took Mikey’s hand. I looked out to the empty chairs that were once filled with screaming fans.
“So Long and Goodnight,” I said softly quoting our most famous song. I put my arm around my little brother and walked off the stage for the final time. We drove to the airport and boarded a plane. We were oblivious to the fact that Frank wasn’t done fighting.
Chapter 8
The plane landed in Belleville, NJ at about 6am Saturday. Mikey and I retrieved our luggage and drove to my house. Mikey decided to move in with me so we sent our assistant, Kaz to Brooklyn to get the rest of Mikey’s belongings.
It’s been about 4 months since that fatal Las Vegas show. What happened in Vegas didn’t stay in Vegas because there are still tabloid reports about the breakup!
Mikey and I are doing great. We told our parents everything and they’ve been really supportive. Today is Mikey’s birthday and I’m determined to make it a good one.
“Hey Mikes,” I said while cleaning up dinner.
“Yeah,” he answered as he slapped my ass.
“As part of your birthday present let’s go to the club!” I suggested.
Mikey agreed and we ran upstairs to get ready.
Mikey put on a tight black shirt and tight jeans. I put on loose jeans and an Iron Maiden tee. I also slipped on my flip flops and grabbed my leather jacket as we headed out the door. We hopped in the car and drove to Sierra Lena Gays and Lesbians Night Club. We walked in and I grabbed Mikey and pulled him to the dance floor.
I grabbed his waist and began thrusting myself into him. I felt his erection through his jeans.
“Anxious?” I asked as I pulled him closer.
“A little bit,” he replied while sweat ran down his face. I licked the sweat off of him.
“Too bad because I’m not doing a damn thing about it here,” I joked.
“Bitch,” he insulted. I grabbed his face and stuck my tongue down his throat making for one of the sloppiest kisses I’ve ever experienced.
“I love you Michael James Way,” I said in his ear after the kiss ended.
“I love you Gerard Arthur Way,” he said back.
“Ready to get going?” I asked out of breath. Mikey swallowed hard.
“Yeah,” he answered, took my hand and let me outside.
“Oh God it’s freezing out here,” Mikey announced. I took off my jacket and wrapped it around him. I gave him a quick peck, stepped in the car and turned on the radio.
“As requested here is Frank Iero’s new song ‘Bruised’” the DJ said.
This hard rock scream-o song played.
“Ya left him for me but then left me for him
You heartless inconsiderate Bitch
Don’t you know that the decision you made has left me scarred and bruised?
I walked away from the best thing I ever had because of you
You loved me, you fucked me, you left me, you punched me, bruised me,” the song played
I turned off the radio before it could finish.
“Wow. Harsh,” Mikey declared.
“No kidding,” I replied angered that Frank would do such a thing.
“What should we do?” Mikey asked knowing that I wanted revenge.
“Let’s send him a fucking sex tape and show him what he doesn’t want to see,”
I answered and began picking up speed in order to get home to make our big screen debut.
Chapter 9
We arrived home at midnight and I immediately set the video recorder, sitting it directly in front of my bed. I hit the record button and turned off the lights. Mikey and I stripped to our boxers and hopped on the bed.
Mikey took the lead by placing various kisses in various areas. He started at my face and moved to my lower abdomen. He bit the elastic of my boxers and began removing them using only his teeth. He succeeded in making me incredibly needy.
His mouth was now at the tip of my erection. He placed his mouth over me and began sucking deeply. I placed my hands in his hair.
“Oh God Mikey!” I yelled in pleasure. For being his first time doing it he did wonderful! “Ahh Mikey!” I screamed releasing myself in his mouth.
He swallowed it down and reached for the tube of lube that was sitting on the end table.
He lubed up his 2 fingers and placed them at my entrance.
“Ready love?” he asked. I nodded and Mikey shoved both fingers in at once. It was painful but Bert showed no mercy when he fucked me so I’ve had worse pain.
He made a scissoring motion inside of me a few times and then removed his fingers. He then proceeded to stroke himself to hardness. After his member was fully erect he placed himself at my entrance. He slowly inserted himself into me. I winced in pain but quickly got used to it.
He began thrusting in and out of me. He hit my prostate immediately, making me scream out in pleasure.
“Gee I can’t hold it anymore,” Mikey said. He filled my insides with his warm cum and then removed himself. I pulled him into a loving embrace and kissed him passionately.
I looked at Mikey’s beautiful petite frame and face. He smiled. I then realized that I loved him more than anybody I had ever been with, more than Bert and more than Frank.
The way I feel is just unexplainable. He’s just beautiful in every way possible. I kissed him again and then got up and pushed the stop button on the video recorder. I took the tape out, put it in an envelope and wrote Frank’s address on it.
I walked over to my dresser and put on my pajamas. I looked like an idiot because my pajamas were of a skeleton but oh well. I kissed Mikey softly as he lay on my bed completely nude.
“I’ll be right back,” I whispered walking out the door with the tape in hand.
I walked to the mail drop off at the end of the road and slipped the tape in. I began walking back home to the love of my life.
Chapter 10
As I was walking home, my vague thoughts were rudely interrupted by fierce crashes and violent screams. I was shocked but I just assumed it was my rowdy neighbors, Mr. and Mrs. Armstrong. I kept on walking. As I walked the crashes and screams grew louder. The crackling of each step I took, my heavy nervous breathing, the full moon gleaming down upon me and all the dark ominous alleys that I passed were truly terrifying.
The screams became louder. They sounded like high pitched cat screams mixed with deadly crashes. I continued walking but my pace strengthened. I had then passed the Armstrong’s house and it was clear to me that the noises were not coming from there.
My body was trembling. I continued walking until I realized that the screams and crashes were indeed coming from my house! I froze when I reached my doorstep. I stood outside listening, to terrified to enter.
“AHHHHHHH QUIT PLEASE!” the first voice pleaded. I had a very dominant feeling in the pit of my stomach that something was seriously wrong.
“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” demanded the second voice followed by a painful crash. I stood there in shock and then realized that I recognized at least one of the two voices.
I quickly whipped open the door and ran inside with no concern for my own personal safety. My house was pitch black but I continued running which resulted in tripping over something that had clearly been thrown out of place.
“YOU BASTARD JUST QUIT IT!” the first voice cried in pain. That plead was followed by a dramatic slap. That particular voice was strangely familiar.
“MIKEY?” I shouted up the stairs. My response was a possibly heavy object being thrown against the wall and cries of pain.
Suddenly a faint shadow came peering over the top of the stairs. My heart was racing.
Then to my complete and utter shock the shadow came running down the stairs, shoving me onto the floor.
My back ached in pain and the shadow disappeared out the door. I heard intense crying coming from upstairs. I pulled myself to my feet and started making my way to my bedroom. I moved as fast as I possibly could.
“Mikey, sweetie it’s me, Gerard,” I said softly. The crying continued and then I reached the top of the stairs. The only light in the room was that coming from the moon.
Mikey was lying on the floor nude, covered in blood, with my desk on top of his small weakened frame.
I ran over to my baby brother, who was noticeably in pain. I pulled the desk off of him and sat down by him, wrapping my arms securely around him.
“Are you okay? What happened? Who did this?” I asked all at once.
“Gee, he… he…. he…. raped me and… and… f…f….fought me,” Mikey confessed as tears streamed down his face like running water coming from a faucet.
“Oh sweetie,” I said softly while stroking his beautiful hair. I looked at his lower half. He had blood rushing from his genitals and entrance. I got up, being careful not to hurt him, and got a damp cloth from the bathroom. I sat back down and placed the cloth between his legs to gather the blood.
“Oh baby, I’m sorry,” I apologized feeling guilty for leaving him alone. The simplest way to put it is; I was selfish in wanted revenge against Frank and I ended up putting the love of my life in the face of danger because of it. I felt guilty although I’m sure Mikey would tell me that it’s “not my fault.”
I took him in my arms and felt his body go limp against mine. I kissed his bloodied cheek tenderly.
“Who did this to you honey?” I asked as I continued to stroke his soft, mangled hair.
“F….F….Fra….Frank,” Mikey confessed through his tears. I looked him straight in his eyes, which were bloodshot from crying. I felt the anger boil up in my veins.
“That bastard,” I thought to myself.
Chapter 11
After comforting Mikey in a brotherly way, I had a strong decision made that I would fight to the grave on.
“You have to see a doctor,” I said not trying to sugar coat what had happened.
“What Gerard? I’m fine!” Mikey insisted. I rolled my disbelieving eyes.
“No you’re not. Your body is torn. You’re seeing a doctor!” I declared, sounding like my overprotective mother.
“If I see a doctor will you get off my fucking case?” Mikey asked with a crude attitude.
“Yeah I will but with that attitude you’re not getting ANY sympathy what-so-ever,” I said with my own attitude. I got up and left the room.
I knew he was upset and that he had a good reason to be but I was so pissed that I didn’t take his feelings into consideration.
I went downstairs and feel asleep on the couch. In the morning I made Mikey an appointment with Dr. Cape to get checked out. I was awake for well over 3 hours before I had to wake Mikey up. I went back upstairs to wake him.
“Mike get up,” I said shaking him gently. He rolled over and rubbed his eyes. I handed him his glasses.
“I made up an appointment with Dr. Cape. We have to leave in 10 minutes so get ready,” I stated bluntly.
“Fine,” he said quietly. He got up and started dressing. I began leaving the room.
“Are you mad at me?” Mikey asked. I turned around.
“No, not really,” I answered blankly and went back downstairs. Within 5 minutes Mikey and I were in the car. The car ride was silent with little conversation. We arrived and waited for nearly a half hour until Dr. Cape’s assistant, Jodi, walked in.
“Mikey Way?” she asked looking around.
“Want me to go with you?” I asked Mikey. He nodded and we followed Jodi into Dr. Cape’s office.
“He’ll be here in a few minutes,” Jodi said. We waited patiently.
“Nervous?” I asked him. He swallowed hard.
“Yeah, wouldn’t you be too?” he asked.
I answered “yes” and then Dr. Cape walked in.
“Hello Michael. I see here that you are in need of a rape test?” he asked. Mikey blushed and nodded his head.
“Okay, no problem. Who is this and do you want him in here with you?” Dr. Cape asked pointing at me.
“He’s my brother and yes I do want him in here,” Mikey replied.
“Ok great,” Dr. Cape said and proceeded with the exam. He directed Mikey to remove his pants and then examined his lower half. Mikey was blushing but that’s expecting when you’re being touched by a complete stranger. Dr. Cape checked his entrance.
“You’re a bit torn up. We’re going to have to put some stitches in ya,” he stated. Mikey gave me a “you-got-to-be-kidding” look. Dr. Cape proceeded to stitch Mikey up. Mikey winced in pain a few times but overall took it well.
Dr. Cape then took a sample of the sperm that Frank had left behind in my poor baby brother.
“By chance to you know who did this?” Dr. Cape asked.
“No,” I quickly snapped. I hated Frank but I didn’t want him in jail. We finished talking to Dr. Cape, who said that Mikey should take it easy for a few days, and then we were released from the hospital. We started driving.
“I have a surprise for you,” I said to Mikey as we drove past our house.
“What?” he said with a better attitude than before.
“I’m taking you to Hawaii. I packed our shit last night and put it in the trunk last night,” I said trying to cheer him up.
“Really? Wow!” Mikey exclaimed. I drove to the airport. Mikey and I needed some romance after what happened. I just hoped he would be up for it.
Chapter 12
We arrived at the airport and boarded Flight 271. We took our seats. I sat by the window and Mikey got the isle. I took his hand in mine.
“What time is it?” He asked. I looked at my watch.
“2:40pm. The flight is 8 hours,” I replied and the plane took off. Mikey squeezed my hand.
“I’m sorry ‘bout having attitude with you earlier,” Mikey apologized. I brought his hand to my mouth and kissed it.
“Don’t worry about it sweetie,” I said placing my head on his shoulder.
“Tired?” Mikey asked. I nodded.
“Rest love and I’ll wake ya if you’re needed,” he said sweetly. I sat up briefly to kiss him.
“Love you,” I said laying my head back on his shoulder and then closed my eyes. It wasn’t long before I fell asleep. I was waked by Mikey’s hand gently stroking my package. I felt myself get hard. I opened my eyes and noticed that he had a blanket covering us.
“What are you doing?” I asked him quietly.
“I’m bored,” he announced.
“I’m hard,” I said stating the obvious.
“I’ll take care of that later but right now I have to pee,” Mikey said getting up from his seat. I sat patiently but got bored quickly. A genius idea hit me. I got up and went to the bathroom where Mikey was doing his “business.” I slammed on the door.
“Just a minute,” he said from inside the bathroom.
“Bullshit Michael. Open up it’s me,” I said and Mikey opened the door.
“What do you want?” he asked smiling.
“You,” I replied and shoved him back into the small room. I slammed the door shut and grabbed his waist and moved him against the wall. I kissed his neck and then moved up to his mouth. Our tongues battled and I moved my hands from his face to his chest to his zipper. I began unzipping his zipper and fucking turbulence hit! We were immediately thrown from the room onto the isle of the plane. The flight attendant told us to get back to our seats. We got up, embarrassed, and made our way back to our seats. Turbulence went on for a few minutes and then the flight was back to normal. Shortly after, we landed safely on the ground. We exited the plane and I looked at my watch. It read 10:17pm.
We got to the rental car and drove to the hotel. We checked into the Maui Aloha Hotel. I took my swimming trunks out of my bag and sat my bag on the bed.
“Grab your shorts and towel,” I told Mikey.
“Why?” he asked.
“Just do it,” I insisted. He got up off the couch and obeyed my command.
“Get changed,” I continued bossing him. We both got changed and I put a blindfold on him.
“What are you doing?” Mikey asked curiously.
“Do you trust me?” I asked avoiding his question.
“Of course I do. You’re my brother, why wouldn’t I trust you?” he answered.
“Good answer. Now follow me,” I said taking his hand. I led him out of the hotel and 4 blacks down to the ocean. The moon beamed on us beautifully.
Chapter 13
I led him to the edge of the ocean, letting the tide come in on our bare feet.
“Are we at the ocean?” Mikey asked.
“Shhh,” I said. I turned him around and took off the blindfold and threw it on the ground. Mikey gasped.
“We are at the ocean!” he exclaimed. He jumped up on me, wrapping his legs around my waist and arms around my neck. I placed a soft kiss on his cheek and began carrying him into the cold ocean water. I went in up to my chest and stopped. The moon continued to beam upon us.
“Gerard this is perfect. I love you,” Mikey whispered in my ear. I bashed my lips onto his. Once again our tongues battled. I rubbed my hand on his lower back and ass. He also stroked my back. We kissed passionately until Mikey pulled away.
“I feel bad,” he said looking me into the eye.
“Why baby?” I asked staring deeply.
“Because I wanna make love to you but I can’t,” he confessed.
“Still sore?” I asked lowering him into the water.
“Yeah,” he said with a deep swallow.
“Don’t worry about it love. I don’t love you any less,” I joked. Mikey laughed and began splashing me. I dove under the water and pulled his shorts to his ankles. I came back up.
“You’re awful,” he declared in a joking manner and then pulled up his shorts. I moved toward him and brought him into a hug. We held each other for a while, just listening to the sounds of nature. I felt Mikey shivering against my body.
“You’re shaking. Do you wanna go back up to the hotel?” I asked. He answered “yes” and we walked back to the hotel with towels wrapped around our cold bodies. When we got back to our room we got naked and climbed into bed together. We held each other until we fell asleep. We had such a wonderful night. Too bad our vacation was about to become a dramatic soap opera!
Chapter 14
I woke with Mikey in my arms. He was sound asleep. I sat up and heard somebody coughing. I looked over at the couch and there sat Frank! My jaw dropped and my heart stopped.
“Morning Beautiful,” Frank said enthusiastically. Mikey sat up beside me.
“What the fuck?” Mikey asked obviously shocked to see Frank.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Well I recently received an interesting package from the two of you and I thought I’d share it with everybody at the hotel. I made copies and put them outside every room!” Frank admitted.
“Also, I figured you’d like to view it with me!” he added and turned the TV on. There was Mikey and I fucking each other.
“Why the fuck would you do this?” Frank asked violently. I answered as the tape played.
“This is mild compared to you raping Mikey!” I screamed out.
“Shut the fuck up! I never did that to him!” Frank denied.
“Bullshit Frank! You did it. Fucking admit it!” Mikey yelled at him.
“Fuck. Fine, I did it and I’ll fucking do it again if you don’t shut up!” Frank threatened. Mikey then ran from the room sobbing and I lost my fucking cool. I shoved Frank to the ground.
“Threaten him again and I’ll fucking kill you. That’s a promise!” I scolded.
“Now you’re threatening me!” Frank stated.
“You’re fucking stalking us! How the fuck did you get in here?” I said loudly. Frank got up from the floor.
“You left me for Mikey!”
“You dared me to kiss him!”
“You destroyed the band!”
“You wrote a violent song about me!”
“You sent me a sex tape!”
“You raped my brother!”
We bickered like children. After I mentioned the rape Frank was speechless for the first time in his life.
I shoved Frank away from the door.
“What are you doing?” he asked me in a normal talking voice.
“Finding my brother!” I declared. I exited the room and slammed the door behind me.
Chapter 15
I ran down to the lobby and seen Mikey sitting alone at a table. I went and sat by him. He looked pissed off.
“Don’t fucking talk to me!” Mikey commanded. I was shocked.
“Why the fuck are you mad at me?” I asked baffled by his madness.
“Well let’s see. You insisted on making a sex tape because of a song! Now the entire hotel gets to view it! Good fucking idea, Gee!” Mikey said through tears. I wanted to hold him so bad but I knew he wouldn’t go for it.
“Mikey, I…”
“You better fix this shit between you and Frank or we’re done!” Mikey cut me off.
His comment made me want to vomit. He got up and left the table. I put my head in my hands and cried for hours. Eventually a young waitress came over to me. She was holding a dinner menu.
“Sir, can I get you anything?” she asked. I looked up and accepted the menu.
I quickly scanned through it. Nothing sparked my interest.
“Uh…” I started. Then I spotted the beverage section of the menu.
“Umm…” I continued.
“Would you like more time to decide?” she asked politely.
“Uh…No, can I just get a beer?” I asked.
“Right away Sir,” she obliged.
“Great thanks. Keep them coming if you would,” I stated, throwing my sobriety away. The waitress nodded and walked off to retrieve my order.
Chapter 16
After hours of drinking, I passed out. I have faint memory of somebody taking me back to the room but I don’t have the slightest clue of who it may be.
When I woke up the next morning Frank was sitting on the bed next to where I was laying.
“I was worried about you,” he said when I opened my eyes.
My head was pounding. I forgot what a hangover felt like.
“What? Where’s Mikey?” I replied quietly. Frank rolled his eyes.
“On a plane back to Jersey,” he started. “He found out about you drinking and was pissed so he left. He doesn’t care about you Gerard.’
“Screw him then,” I said defensively. Frank nodded.
“Who knows what could have happened if I wasn’t there,” Frank said letting his ego shine through.
He moved closer to me and pressed his lips against mine. His tongue begged for entrance and I granted it. Our tongues battled viciously. Frank’s hand traveled down my body and landed on my package. He began stroking it gently and proceeded to undo my pants. I pulled away.
“Frank, NO!”
“No what?”
“We can’t do this.”
“Gee, I love you. Why can’t we?”
“We’ve been over this. I love Mikey.”
“Mikey doesn’t want you anymore!”
“I don’t care. I’m not giving up that easily. I have to fight for him.”
Frank got up and walked toward the door.
“Fine,” he said in a depressed tone. He exited the room, leaving me alone.
Maybe I should have felt bad for that but I didn’t.
I grabbed my phone and dialed 514-4370, Mikey’s cell. After 3 rings, he picked up.
“Hello?”
“Mikey, it’s Gee. Where are you? Frank said you went back to Jersey,”
“No I didn’t. I’m at the ocean.”
“Wait. What? Frank told me you got pissed at me for drinking and that you left.”
“I was mad but I’m not anymore. Why are you listening to Frank anyway? He only wants to destroy us so he can get back with you.”
“You’re right. I shouldn’t be giving him the time of day.”
“Uh huh. Hey I miss. Come down to the ocean. We can spend some time together.”
“Yeah, that sounds fun. I’ll be there in a few minutes. I love you.”
“Love ya babe. See ya soon,”
We hung up the phone and I left to go be with Mikey.
Chapter 17
When I arrived at the ocean Mikey was laying on the ground on top of his sponge bob beach towel. I went and laid next to him.
“Hey Beautiful,” I said.
“Hey, Gerard listen. Don’t worry about the drinking thing. I’m not mad. I’m just glad to be with you,” he replied clearing the air.
“Ok good,” I said and kissed him on the cheek. Right after I kissed him two young girls approached us.
“Hey, Can we have your autographs?” the black haired girl asked. We nodded and signed their old MCR CDs.
“Thank you so much,” the red haired girl said.
“No problem. You girls have a nice day,” Mikey said and turned his attention to me.
“Months after the breakup and we’re still signing autographs,” Mikey joked.
“Die - hard fans,” I replied with a smile. We were watching two guys surfing. They were extremely good at it! I was envious.
“We should try that Mikes,” I suggested. Mikey laughed in disbelief.
“Uh no,” he answered, “but I do wanna try something.”
“What?” I asked innocently.
“Follow me,” he demanded taking my hand and leading me into the changing room.
“What are we doing?” I asked suspiciously.
“You talk way to fuckin’ much!” he exclaimed while ripping my shirt off my body.
“Mikey here?” I said shocked.
“Zip it,” he insisted and took off his shirt.
Chapter 18
After removing both our shirts Mikey smashed his lips onto mine and shoved his tongue in my mouth. We swapped spit with each other for a while and then Mikey began removing my shorts. I was already getting hard.
After he had me naked he pulled his shorts off and shoved two fingers in my mouth.
“Suck!” he instructed.
I obeyed him and after I sucked he placed his fingers at my entrance. He put one inside of me and slight pain shot through my body. He entered the second finger and the pain became more intense.
He began scissoring his fingers inside of me and then removed them. I was so hard it was becoming painful! He placed his cock slowly inside me and began thrusting.
“Harder!” I demanded.
He did as I said and thrust harder. He nailed my prostate and I screamed in pleasure and pain.
“AHH Mikey!” I yelled.
“I’m cumming!” Mikey announced.
AHH baby, so am I,” I seconded.
He released his warm cum inside of me and I released mine on our stomachs. We were breathing heavy.
I pulled him into a hug. While we were hugging I began stroking his back gently.
“I love you more than air,” I told him sincerely.
“Same to you baby,” he replied, “Let’s go back to our room.”
“Yeah let’s do that,” I answered.
Mikey grabbed his shirt and cleaned our bodies off.
He then grabbed his shorts and put them back on. I did the same and then took his hand in mine. I brought his hand up to my mouth and kissed it.
“You mean the world to me. You know that right?” I asked.
“Of course I know that,” he reassured me.
I led him out of the changing room and we walked back up to our hotel room.
Chapter 19
Wile we were walking back to the hotel Mikey informed me that he wasn’t feeling well. He said he had extreme stomach cramps and a painful migraine. He looked pale and his eyes were glassy. By the time we got back Mikey looked as though he was going to vomit. I heard him gagging and coughing as he ran into the bathroom. I went in by him and sat on the floor. I began stroking his back and caressing his hair as he continued to vomit.
“Are you okay?” I asked even though the answer was obvious.
“Nah,” he replied while spitting. His eyes were rolling to the back of his head. His body looked weak. I was extremely worried.
“Aw baby,” I said trying to comfort him. I sat there with him for nearly an hour. He looked up at me.
“Gee, I’ve never felt like this before,” he said as a single tear ran down his cheek.
“Aw come here,” I said taking him into my arms. He was shivering but when I placed a kiss on his forehead he was burning up. I held him tightly until I felt him pass out in my arms.
“Mikey?” I said unsure of what to do.
I carefully stood up and carried him onto the bed. I laid him there and got a cool rag. I gently wiped the rag over his flesh while I caressed his hair. He slowly opened his eyes.
“Hey,” I said with a relieving smile. He gave me a weak smile back.
“You look rough. Just rest for the night,” I instructed.
“Okay,” he said whispering. He closed his eyes and went to sleep. I sat there just admiring his face. He was sick but still beautiful. I took his glasses off and placed them on the nightstand. I kissed his head lightly and proceeded to clean up the room, which had been polluted with clothing. After hours of cleaning, it actually looked like humans had been staying there.
I went over to the bed where Mikey was sleeping and laid down beside him. I laid there for a while praying that he’d feel better in the morning and I eventually fell asleep.
When I woke up, Mikey was still sleeping soundly. I decided to call up room service for breakfast.
“Good Morning. This is Daniel. How may I help you?” said the man politely.
“Good Morning Daniel. This is Gerard Way. I was just wondering what I can get for a breakfast,” I replied trying to sound just as professional.
“Well Mr. Way, we have quite a selection,” Daniel started, “Some of our most popular items include a simple order of toast, bagels, pancakes, eggs and such.”
“That all sounds great but I need something for a light stomach,” I stated.
“In that case I would suggest something such as fruit or a soup,” Daniel suggested.
“Uh the fruit sounds good,” I decided.
“Of course and it will be there within 5 minutes,” he ended. I hung up the phone and went to sit by Mikey. I began stroking his hair. Just then there was a loud knock on the door.
“ROOMSERVICE!” a voice yelled. I got up and retrieved my order.
“Hey Mikey, wake up,” I said softly into his ear.
He didn’t answer.
Chapter 20
I shook him a bit and finally his eyes opened.
“Yeah,” he said weakly.
“I ordered us some food. How ya feeling?” I asked.
“Not the best,” he answered.
“Well try to eat something,” I said handing him a pear. He took a few bites and then stopped.
“Gerard, I don’t wanna worry you but could you please drive me to the hospital?” he asked. My heart about stopped!
“Yeah let’s go,” I said.
I drove as fast as I could to the hospital. I was going around 80 in a 55 zone so if I was pulled over chances are I’d end up in jail. Thankfully, I didn’t get pulled over.
When we arrived at the Koike Hospital I went with Mikey to the main desk.
“Aloha Gentlemen, how may I help you?” asked the red haired woman behind the desk. Her name was Kina and she was probably in her mid 30s.
“Uh Hi, my name is Michael Way. I was really sick last night and I’m still not feeling the greatest,” Mikey explained.
“Okay hun, you look pale so go and wait in that room. Dr. Zaire will be in soon,” Kina assured Mikey while pointing to Dr. Zaire’s office.
“Who are you? Father? Brother?” Kina asked me as I stood there dumbfounded.
“Brother,” I answered.
“Good. Now I’m assuming you’re over 18 so fill this out for Michael,” she said handing me a form. I quickly filled it out and handed it back to her. She looked it over quickly.
“You’re Gerard Way?” she asked.
“Uh huh,” I replied thinking a comment about MCR was to be made.
“We had an attempted suicide victim come in this afternoon and we found this in his pocket,” she explained handing me an envelope with my name on it.
“Who was the victim?” I asked curiously.
Chapter 21
“Frank Iero,” she answered. My heart began racing.
“Oh my God, is he alright? What happened?” I asked worried as I fought back tears. Truth is; Frank may have caused Mikey and I a lot of emotional pain but we have a history and that history will never disappear. We were together for years and he was a big part of my life. That won’t ever change.
“He’s in critical condition and he slit his wrists,” Kina explained trying to stay calm. I, however, was a mess.
“Uh thanks. I’m gonna go read this,” I said holding the envelope. She nodded. I went over to the waiting area and read the letter.
Dear Gerard,
I’m not sure if you’ll ever read this. I may be wasting my time but here’s what I have to say. When you broke up with me I fell to an all-time low. I was heartbroken and depressed. When Mikey confided in me about having romantic feelings for you I decided to play with them and dared you to kiss him. I had no idea that such an action would later become my greatest regret. I love you so much. I’d die for your happiness and since I’m causing you grief, I feel like I have to. I intend on ending my own life in your honor. Please attend my funeral with Mikey, Brian, Ray and Bob. You and the band were my life and since both are over, I have no reason to live. I’ll love you forever.
Love,
Frankie
By the end of the letter, I was crying hysterically and Mikey was standing in front of me with Dr. Zaire.
“I just told your brother about Frank Iero. He’s been asking to see you. I suggest you go now. He doesn’t have much time left,” Dr. Zaire said.
I took a deep breath and wiped the tears from my eyes.
“Uh okay,” I replied. We were pointed in the direction of Frank’s room.
“So what was wrong?” I asked Mikey.
“He said I had a minor case of food poisoning,” Mikey replied.
We walked into Frank’s room. He was lying there with large casts over his arms. His flesh was pale. I sat in the chair next to Frank’s bed.
“Frankie?” I asked softly. He barely opened his eyes.
“Gee, I love you,” he spoke quietly and closed his eyes again.
Just then Dr. Zaire walked in and the monitors went blank and made a drowned out beeping sound. I panicked.
“FRANKIE NO, C’MON MAN HOLD ON! DON’T GIVE UP!” I cried as Dr. Zaire tended to Frank who was slowly dying. Mikey grabbed my body and held me tightly.
“Gerard, I love you. I love you,” he said repeatedly in my ear. He then rocked me back and forth trying to be as comforting as possible.
“We lost him,” Dr. Zaire said remorsefully.
“NO!” I screamed and broke into tears. Mikey however showed no emotion.
Chapter 22
After receiving the horrible news about Frank, Mikey and I hopped on a plane and flew back home to Jersey. Frank’s body was also taken back for burial. We got home and called the guys about funeral information. None of them took it well. After making the calls, I felt vulnerable and needed Mikey.
“Mikey, I need you,” I said softly. He got up and climbed onto the reclining chair with me. He sat on my lap and started kissing me passionately. Our tongues glided over each other and eventually his kisses moved to my neck.
His hands began unbuttoning my shirt and placed kisses over my bare chest. He quickly removed his shirt and threw it to the floor with mine.
He then unzipped my pants and removed them also. It wasn’t long before he had me completely naked on the chair. He leaned down and placed a kiss on my penis before taking it in his mouth. I felt my cock hit the back of his throat. With each such I felt myself get closer to cumming.
After quite a few sucks I released myself into his mouth. He swallowed it easily. A sweet sensation of pleasure ran through my body. He removed his mouth and sucked on his fingers. He slowly entered them inside me and prepared my body. He then removed his own pants and placed his erection at my entrance. He entered himself slowly and started with slow, steady thrusts. He rapidly picked up speed, hitting my prostate easily. That wave of pleasure stole my body once again and our breathing became heavy. It was a bitter-sweet moment.
“I’m cumming,” he whispered releasing himself in my body. He then removed himself and pulled me into an embrace. I felt amazing. For the first time, I felt like we made love instead of just fucking. I then looked over at the clock.
“Shit Mikey, we have to go to Frank’s funeral,” I said softly. We kissed passionately once again, got dressed, and left for the funeral.
Chapter 23
We arrived at the church and I immediately noticed that everybody there was in black or red, similar to the “Helena” video.
I seen Frank’s father right away and Mikey and I went to comfort him. He broke into tears when he saw us and that made me break down also. After saying talking with Frank’s devastated family for a while we went over to Ray and Bob, our former band mates.
“Hey guys, where’s Brian?” Mikey asked, still showing no emotion.
“His wife went into labor last night so he couldn’t make it but he sends his remorse,” Ray explained. Bob looked at me. Tears were streaming down his face. I had never seen Bob cry before so it was hard.
”He was one hell-of-a guy,” Bob said sadly and pulled me into a hug. Mikey then grabbed my hand and led me up to the front of the church were Frank’s body rested in a coffin. Bob and Ray followed us. I looked down into the coffin. Frank’s pale, tattooed frame glared up at us. His eyes closed. His body clothed in his usual concert outfit. I was then reminded of the time, months ago, when I watched him sleep with his ipod in the bunk, only this time he wasn’t sleeping. He would never wake up. He would never speak to us again. He would never tell his dad that he loves him. He would never play his guitar again. Just that thought made me even more heartbroken. That and the thought of his father made me devastated.
Mikey, Bob and Ray all walked away, leaving me alone by Frank’s corpse.
“I’ll forever love you,” I whispered into the coffin and placed a rose in by his body. I reached my hand in the coffin and stroked his hand one last time. His flesh was freezing but was still as soft as the first time I ever held it.
“Goodbye Frankie,” I said and took my seat next to Mikey. The funeral director proceeded with saying goodbye to one of the world’s greatest guitar players.
The service lasted about an hour and I cried through it all. Mikey showed no emotion what-so-ever. After it was over Mikey and I hopped into the car and began driving home. We turned on the radio.
“Up next is a rare demo by the late Frank Iero. It’s entitled ‘Sorry,’” the DJ said and then played the demo.
“My love, my best friend
I hope you’re sorry for, tearing me apart
I am sorry for letting you go
No matter how the ball rolls
Or how hard the wind blows
How bright the sun shines
How hard the rain falls
How deadly the lightening may be
I will forever love you
You are my world
My sanity
My security
My reason for living
My reason for leaving
Aw baby I’ve decided to leave
I’m sorry for leaving you this way
My alternative is not apparent and could be nonexistent
I have no other choice
You’ll forever remain my love
My desire
My emotion
My pleasure
I’m sorry
Now, don’t shed your tears for me
Shed them for what we had
And what we’ll never get again
Let your final tear fall,”
His lyrics were beautiful. They were set to a dreary drum part with light guitar. His vocals were amazing. He was always my backup singer. If I had only knew what a talent he really was, he would have been singing lead too! Who am I kidding? He’s gone now and no matter how much I pray or how hard I cry, he’s not coming back. It kills me that I’m the reason he slit his wrists and it will forever haunt me. His lyrics, to both songs, will forever haunt me! I can only blame myself for his actions. I took a deep breath and looked at Mikey. He was beautiful. I know he hated Frank for raping him but none of that mattered when the rapist is in the ground. I forgave Frank at his funeral when I told him that I loved him. Mikey, however, will hold a grudge until he’s laid to rest. That’s fine, I guess. I still love Mikey more than life itself, although I don’t exactly love life at this moment. I took another deep breath and focused on driving. I swallowed hard and let that final tear roll down my trembling cheek.
Pairing: Mikey and Gerard Way.
Gerard Way’s point of view
“Gerard, truth or dare?” Frank asked me backstage after our Chicago concert.
“Dare,” I answered confidently, unaware of what was coming.
“I dare you to make out with Mikey,” Frank replied.
I looked over at my baby brother. His straight, sandy blonde hair was plastered to his face, slightly tucked in his glasses. His Anthrax shirt hugged his torso and his tight jeans fit his lower half perfectly.
“Okay,” I said after a moments thought. I moved toward Mikey. I tilted my head to the right. Mikey went left. Our lips joined and my tongue entered his mouth. As our tongues were battling and our band mates hollering I realized that I was enjoying the kiss more than I should have been. Finally after several minutes of kissing, Mikey pulled away. I felt my face get red. I smiled at Mikey and he smiled back.
“That was well worth it!” Frank exclaimed, obviously pleased at what he had just done.
As Ray, Bob, Frank, and Brian, our manager, continued clapping I looked over at my younger brother. He looked radiant. I wanted him and I really hoped he wanted me. We’re both gay and we’re open about it but dating a sibling is wrong. I can’t love Mikey and yet I want to be with him more than anything.
Chapter 1
It’s been over a week since my former love, Frank, dared me to kiss me new love, Mikey. We’ve been on tour for months now and we still have another 2 months to go. The bus has reached its disgusting state. All our clothes are filthy and are scattered in various areas. The bus and our bodies now reek of dirty socks and rotten eggs. Despite the filth, Mikey couldn’t be more beautiful. Every pore on his body and every blemish on his face is sheer beauty. It is now 4 am, Friday morning. We just passed a sign that read “Welcome to Las Vegas.” Seeing as we’re in Vegas, “what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas,” I’ve made a conscience decision to declare my love to Mikey as soon as we check into the hotel.
My eyes wondered over to Mikey’s bunk. He lay there sleeping silently in nothing but surfer shorts. His glasses sit next to his head that rest on his yellowed pillow that he’s had since we were young. I smile at just the sight of him.
The rest of my exhausted band mates were also sleeping. Ray was peacefully crashed face down, his afro absorbing his entire head. Bob lay there, mouth wide open, with a Playboy magazine collapsed on his chest. My ex love Frank was fast asleep with his ipod still attached to his ears. He’s a beautiful guy and I’m truly sorry that we didn’t work but now I have a new focus, Mikey.
Suddenly the bus came to a violent stop. Everybody shot up in their bunks, Bob hitting his head. After taking a few minutes to dress we went into the Palms Hotel and checked in. We got our room keys and headed to our rooms. Thankfully, Mikey insisted on sharing a room with me but unfortunately the rest of the guys had rooms on an entirely different floor! Mikey and I grabbed our bags, got in the elevator, and entered room 361. It was time for me to confess my feelings.
“Mikey, I need to tell you something,” I started. My knees were weak.
“Alright, what is it?” He asked innocently. He began hanging up our clothes in the closet.
“Remember last week when Frank dared me to make out with you?” I continued. My stomach was also feeling weak. Mikey raised his eyebrow curiously.
“Uh huh,” he replied suspiciously. I took and released a deep breath and walked toward him.
“Umm that kiss was more than just a dare. Mikey, I think I’m in love with you,” I confessed with bad wording.
“What? NO, don’t even say that!” Mikey screamed and ran from the room. I ran after him, determined to talk it over.
Chapter 2
“Mikey, you have to talk to me,” I said when I caught up to Mikey. He stopped by a vending machine and looked at me with a sad expression smothering his face. His eyes were heartbreaking.
“Frank Iero is a sick bastard!” Mikey declared.
“What?” I said struggling to catch my breath. I’m a bit out of shape but that’s beside the point. I was slightly confused about Mikey’s accusation about the guy I used to be in love with.
“Frank told you that I’m head over heals in love with you and then put you up to this sick joke didn’t he?” Mikey shouted. My jaw dropped in shock.
“What are you talking about? Frank hasn’t told me anything!” I defended both myself and Frank.
“He didn’t?” Mikey asked embarrassed.
“No, and if he had I wouldn’t have played a joke like that on you. Mikey, what I said is 100% true,” I said taking his small frame in mine.
“Well I feel ridiculous but I’m glad you feel the same way,” he said pulling me into and even tighter embrace. As I was rubbing his back I felt him kiss my neck.
“Let’s go back to our room,” I suggested. He nodded. I took his hand in mine and we walked back to our room.
Chapter 3
By the time we reached the room I was giving Mikey a piggy back ride while he was sucking my neck. I opened the door to our hotel room and walked in.
“Shower?” I asked letting Mikey down.
“Fuck yeah,” he replied racing me to the bathroom.
We quickly undressed ourselves. I’ve always known Mikey was thin but I never realized just how thin he really is! I scanned his body and let my eyes rest on his package for a moment. His eyes were also latched on mine.
I went over and turned on the shower. As I bent over Mikey slapped my bare ass. I grabbed his hand and pulled him into the steamy shower. I immediately jerked him under the hot water and pulled him into a firm hug. I felt his erection against mine. I started kissing him passionately and moved my kisses to his neck, torso and thigh. I stopped before I reached his genitals. I looked up at Mikey, who seemed hesitant.
“Gerard, know that I’m a virgin,” he stated. To be honest I was shocked but yet relieved.
“That’s fine. We don’t have to do this,” I said bluntly.
“No, I want to Gee,” he snapped back.
“I’ll stop at any point you want me to,” I answered the petite boy.
“Okay but for now, please continue,” Mikey begged.
I proceeded, putting my attention back on Mikey’s member. I took a deep breath and started blowing on his penis. His erection grew slightly larger. I enjoyed teasing him.
“Ahh Gerard, you have to do something. It hurts!” Mikey pleaded.
He put his hands in my hair and began caressing my head. I started kissing Mikey’s aching member, making him incredibly needy. I placed my mouth over his groin and began sucking. I felt him hit the back of my throat, making me realize just how big he really is!
“Ahh fuck Gee,” Mikey exclaimed. I felt him release himself in my mouth. I swallowed it greedily and removed my mouth from his package. I placed my hand on his scrotum and placed a gentle kiss on the tip of his penis.
“Better?” I asked sarcastically.
“Yeah but could we continue?” he asked innocently.
I stood up and placed 2 fingers at his mouth.
“Suck bro,” I demanded. He quickly began sucking my fingers. After a few seconds of sucking I pulled my fingers from his mouth and placed one at Mikey’s entrance.
“My 1st time was painful. I’m just warning you,” I cautioned.
“I don’t give a fuck,” Mikey argued. I slowly entered my finger. I looked at Mikey.
“Okay?” I asked. Mikey nodded and I entered a second finger.
I made a scissoring motion inside of him. He winced in pain. I stopped and looked my baby brother. I didn’t want to hurt him.
“It kills but continue,” he stated. I nodded and did the scissoring motion a few more times and then removed my fingers.
“Are you positive?” I asked making sure he was ready.
“Fuck yeah,” he said impatiently. I placed my member at Mikey’s entrance and slowly began inserting myself into him. Mikey screamed in pain.
“It gets better baby,” I promised. He gave a simple nod and I started thrusting into him slowly.
“Harder Gee,” Mikey demanded. I picked up speed. I was randomly switching directions determined to find his prostate.
”Ahh Fuck Gee,” he screamed. I found it easily! My member was close to exploding now.
“Mikey, I’m cumming,” I announced as I released myself into him. After I was done filling his insides I removed myself from him and brought him into an embrace.
“Was is worth the pain?” I asked. He winced.
“Yeah but Gerard it still hurts,” he answered. I immediately got concerned and crouched down to examine his entrance.
“You’re a bit torn hun,” I said remorsefully. He had a few drops of blood dripping from him. I proceeded to clean him up with my mouth. He winced again.
“You should be alright now,” I said after I was done.
I stood up and kissed him passionately, our tongues colliding.
“Let’s go relax before the show,” I suggested. Mikey nodded.
“I love you,” he said. I said it back and helped him out of the shower.
We walked back into our room entirely naked.
“Wow like this doesn’t say something,” a voice from inside the room said. I looked up stunned at who was standing before us.
“Frank?” I said shocked.
Chapter 4
“You’re one hell of a guy Gerard,” Frank started as I quickly handed Mikey a towel to cover himself. To be quite honest I didn’t care if Frank seen me nude because we were together for 3 years so he’s seen everything but he has no right to be viewing Mikey’s private parts.
I was speechless but Frank had a lot to say.
“You left Bert for me and now you left me for your own flesh and blood! Gerard that’s sick, especially when you know that I still have deep feelings for you! Frank stated harshly.
“Yeah I left Bert for you but I left you because all the fights weren’t worth the sex! It’s just recently that I’ve started having feelings for Mikey. I had no idea that you still have feelings for me which is cool I guess because I think you’re a great guy,” I defended.
I looked over at Mikey who was now fully dressed. He handed me a pair of jeans and a shirt as Frank continued yelling at me.
“You think I’m a great guy. I think you’re the most phenomenal human being to ever walk on this earth! Let’s get back together, be happy, have the hot sex we used to enjoy every night and give the fans a Ferard reunion,” Frank said enthusiastically.
I looked at Mikey. He had a single tear streaming down his right cheek. I walked over, wiped the tear away and kissed him softly.
“You’re the one baby,” I whispered and moved back towards Frank.
“Frank, it’s not that simple,” I started.
“Why the hell not?” he asked, anger rising from his nerves. For being such a small guy he’s really intimidating.
“Because...” I started but was cut off by Frank.
“It’s me or him. You pick me I will be the happiest tattooed freak alive. You pick him and the band is done!” Frank said giving me an ultimatum.
My choice was obvious. It was going to be heartbreaking but I knew it had to be done!
Chapter 5
“Frank, I’m sorry. I love the band but I love Mikey more,” I thought to myself.
I closed my eyes hoping Frank’s ultimatum was a dream.
“You have to give me time to think,” I answered.
Mikey looked shocked. His expression said “is this even a choice?”
“Ok fine. You have until right before we go onstage tonight!” Frank said in an annoyed tone. I looked at the clock. It read 3:00pm.
“3 hours?” I asked, shocked at how fast the day had gone.
“Yup, and I’m sure your choice will be made by then!” Frank said treating me as a child. He left the room slamming the door forcefully behind him.
“He’s being such a jerk,” I said stating the obvious. I walked over to Mikey.
“I know babe but what’s your decision?” he asked as I sat on his lap wrapping my arms around his neck.
“Fuck the band. My decision is to be with you!” I exclaimed. My hand was now wondering around Mikey’s body. I kissed his cheek.
“Are you sure? The band is your baby,” Mikey said softly.
“We’ve had a good run with My Chem. We’re all growing up and you’re my baby now,” I replied in Mikey’s ear. At that point I was sick of being serious so I shoved Mikey on his back and began tickling his flesh.
“Ah ha ha ha ha that tickles baby,” Mikey laughed.
“That’s the point,” I chuckled out. We were rolling around on the bed and eventually rolled ourselves off the bed. Our tickling fun came to a crashing end when we hit the floor. I noticed that Mikey’s head hit the bedside table.
“Are you okay?” I asked concerned.
“Yeah I’m fine,” Mikey replied as I helped him up. I went over to my bag and grabbed Aspirin.
“Take this,” I said handing him 2 pills and bottled water. He swallowed it down easily.
“Thanks Gerard,” he said gratefully. I nodded and then kissed him lightly.
“We gotta head to the stadium for the show. Grab your shit so we can go meet Brian and the guys in the lobby,” I directed. Mikey grabbed his stuff and followed me out the door. We met up with Brian and the guys, all except Frank.
“Where’s Frank?” I asked trying to act like nothing happened.
“He’s on the bus already. He’s really pissed off, almost in tears actually,” Brian informed.
“Hmm I wonder why?” Mikey said giving me a strange look. I felt awful. I didn’t know Frank was that upset. The rest of us filed onto the bus. I noticed Frank laying in his bunk, ipod on his ears and tears streaming down his face. Bob went over to talk to him. Bob has always been good to vent on.
I just sat down by Mikey and tried to enjoy the ride. A few minutes of driving and we were at the stadium. We all quickly moved from the bus to the stadium trying to avoid all the crazy fans. We went backstage and got ready. Right was I finished putting on my white makeup Brian entered.
“You guys ready because ya got 2 minutes,” he announced.
Frank approached me. I got a sick feeling in my stomach.
“What’s your decision?” he asked bluntly. I took a deep breath.
“Sorry but I choose Mikey,” I said apologetically.
“Guys you’re on,” Brian said while pushing us on stage.
“Band’s over. I hate you,” Frank said as he ran out to perform our final show.
Chapter 6
“I don’t care how much you invest yourself in me,
We’re not working out
And you can’t touch my brother
And you can’t keep my friends” I sang during our final song, Vampires.
As I was singing Frank began moving towards Mikey. I got a bit suspicious but I had to keep performing.
“Well I choose this life I’ve taken
Never mind the friends I’m making,” I sang.
Just as the word “making” was sung Frank nailed Mikey in the balls, making him fall in pain and making me go off on Frank. I whipped the microphone down and ran after him. He threw his guitar down and came after me.
I punched him in the side of the face and he proceeded to kick me in the groin, which I’m sadly getting used to.
After Frank kicked me I was on the floor and he hopped his 140-something pound frame on top of me. We were beating the shit out of each other. I had his blood on my flesh and he had mine on his.
Ray came over and started pulling us apart. The security guards were escorting fans safely out of the venue and Bob was tending to Mikey. Ray was unsuccessful at ending the fight and I’m pretty sure he was hit a few times.
As Frank continued hitting me, I looked over to the side of the stage. Worm and the other security guards were rushing on the stage. They yanked us off of each other and that’s when the verbal fighting began.
“You’ve not only ruined the band but you ruined our last show!” I screamed and then coughed up blood.
“You broke my fucking heart. How do you think it felt having to perform knowing that you no longer want me?” Frank yelled at me.
That must have been hard but he told me that he hated me which was just as hard to accept.
“I understand that must have been difficult but you have to understand that I have no sexual interest in you anymore! You no longer mean anything to me. I’ve moved on and maybe you should too!” I said lowering my voice.
“I’ve never heard such cruel words come from anybody’s mouth. I’m heartbroken that you feel that way,” Frank replied while tears ran from his bloodshot eyes.
I was beyond speechless. Frank walked off the stage not bothering to say another word. As the fact that the band was over was sinking in I stood staring blankly at the empty stage. Everything I worked so hard to achieve has just been ripped away.
Chapter 7
Suddenly I felt 2 arms being wrapped around my waist.
“Are you alright bro?” Mikey asked. He laid his head on my shoulder.
“MCR’s is done. Frank hates me and yet I think things will be okay,” I said. I coughed as Mikey kissed my neck.
“Are you okay?” I asked knowing how much Frank’s kicks hurt.
“I’m fine, just upset that you fought him and that the band is done,” He said and then pointed to the side of the stage where Brian stood.
“Frank explained what happened. I’m happy for you 2 but it’s a shame that things went down that way,” he said walking towards us.
“It is a shame but we can’t do anything about it now,” I said softly.
“Too bad,” Brian said handing me 2 plane tickets.
“Frank’s already on a plane to LA. Bob and Ray leave tomorrow morning for Chicago. You guys leave in an hour for Belleville. We got all your things packed and put them in your car,” Brain added. I felt my eyes swell up.
“It’s been a pleasure to work with you guys,” he continued. Mikey pulled Brian into a 3-person hug with me.
“You’re a good guy. Take care of yourself,” Mikey told Brian.
“Keep in touch. We love ya,” I through in. Brian pulled himself from the hug.
“I love all of you guys so don’t hesitate to call if ya need something,” Brian concluded.
He walked off the stage.
“We will,” Mikey and I said in unison.
“Let’s go,” I said and took Mikey’s hand. I looked out to the empty chairs that were once filled with screaming fans.
“So Long and Goodnight,” I said softly quoting our most famous song. I put my arm around my little brother and walked off the stage for the final time. We drove to the airport and boarded a plane. We were oblivious to the fact that Frank wasn’t done fighting.
Chapter 8
The plane landed in Belleville, NJ at about 6am Saturday. Mikey and I retrieved our luggage and drove to my house. Mikey decided to move in with me so we sent our assistant, Kaz to Brooklyn to get the rest of Mikey’s belongings.
It’s been about 4 months since that fatal Las Vegas show. What happened in Vegas didn’t stay in Vegas because there are still tabloid reports about the breakup!
Mikey and I are doing great. We told our parents everything and they’ve been really supportive. Today is Mikey’s birthday and I’m determined to make it a good one.
“Hey Mikes,” I said while cleaning up dinner.
“Yeah,” he answered as he slapped my ass.
“As part of your birthday present let’s go to the club!” I suggested.
Mikey agreed and we ran upstairs to get ready.
Mikey put on a tight black shirt and tight jeans. I put on loose jeans and an Iron Maiden tee. I also slipped on my flip flops and grabbed my leather jacket as we headed out the door. We hopped in the car and drove to Sierra Lena Gays and Lesbians Night Club. We walked in and I grabbed Mikey and pulled him to the dance floor.
I grabbed his waist and began thrusting myself into him. I felt his erection through his jeans.
“Anxious?” I asked as I pulled him closer.
“A little bit,” he replied while sweat ran down his face. I licked the sweat off of him.
“Too bad because I’m not doing a damn thing about it here,” I joked.
“Bitch,” he insulted. I grabbed his face and stuck my tongue down his throat making for one of the sloppiest kisses I’ve ever experienced.
“I love you Michael James Way,” I said in his ear after the kiss ended.
“I love you Gerard Arthur Way,” he said back.
“Ready to get going?” I asked out of breath. Mikey swallowed hard.
“Yeah,” he answered, took my hand and let me outside.
“Oh God it’s freezing out here,” Mikey announced. I took off my jacket and wrapped it around him. I gave him a quick peck, stepped in the car and turned on the radio.
“As requested here is Frank Iero’s new song ‘Bruised’” the DJ said.
This hard rock scream-o song played.
“Ya left him for me but then left me for him
You heartless inconsiderate Bitch
Don’t you know that the decision you made has left me scarred and bruised?
I walked away from the best thing I ever had because of you
You loved me, you fucked me, you left me, you punched me, bruised me,” the song played
I turned off the radio before it could finish.
“Wow. Harsh,” Mikey declared.
“No kidding,” I replied angered that Frank would do such a thing.
“What should we do?” Mikey asked knowing that I wanted revenge.
“Let’s send him a fucking sex tape and show him what he doesn’t want to see,”
I answered and began picking up speed in order to get home to make our big screen debut.
Chapter 9
We arrived home at midnight and I immediately set the video recorder, sitting it directly in front of my bed. I hit the record button and turned off the lights. Mikey and I stripped to our boxers and hopped on the bed.
Mikey took the lead by placing various kisses in various areas. He started at my face and moved to my lower abdomen. He bit the elastic of my boxers and began removing them using only his teeth. He succeeded in making me incredibly needy.
His mouth was now at the tip of my erection. He placed his mouth over me and began sucking deeply. I placed my hands in his hair.
“Oh God Mikey!” I yelled in pleasure. For being his first time doing it he did wonderful! “Ahh Mikey!” I screamed releasing myself in his mouth.
He swallowed it down and reached for the tube of lube that was sitting on the end table.
He lubed up his 2 fingers and placed them at my entrance.
“Ready love?” he asked. I nodded and Mikey shoved both fingers in at once. It was painful but Bert showed no mercy when he fucked me so I’ve had worse pain.
He made a scissoring motion inside of me a few times and then removed his fingers. He then proceeded to stroke himself to hardness. After his member was fully erect he placed himself at my entrance. He slowly inserted himself into me. I winced in pain but quickly got used to it.
He began thrusting in and out of me. He hit my prostate immediately, making me scream out in pleasure.
“Gee I can’t hold it anymore,” Mikey said. He filled my insides with his warm cum and then removed himself. I pulled him into a loving embrace and kissed him passionately.
I looked at Mikey’s beautiful petite frame and face. He smiled. I then realized that I loved him more than anybody I had ever been with, more than Bert and more than Frank.
The way I feel is just unexplainable. He’s just beautiful in every way possible. I kissed him again and then got up and pushed the stop button on the video recorder. I took the tape out, put it in an envelope and wrote Frank’s address on it.
I walked over to my dresser and put on my pajamas. I looked like an idiot because my pajamas were of a skeleton but oh well. I kissed Mikey softly as he lay on my bed completely nude.
“I’ll be right back,” I whispered walking out the door with the tape in hand.
I walked to the mail drop off at the end of the road and slipped the tape in. I began walking back home to the love of my life.
Chapter 10
As I was walking home, my vague thoughts were rudely interrupted by fierce crashes and violent screams. I was shocked but I just assumed it was my rowdy neighbors, Mr. and Mrs. Armstrong. I kept on walking. As I walked the crashes and screams grew louder. The crackling of each step I took, my heavy nervous breathing, the full moon gleaming down upon me and all the dark ominous alleys that I passed were truly terrifying.
The screams became louder. They sounded like high pitched cat screams mixed with deadly crashes. I continued walking but my pace strengthened. I had then passed the Armstrong’s house and it was clear to me that the noises were not coming from there.
My body was trembling. I continued walking until I realized that the screams and crashes were indeed coming from my house! I froze when I reached my doorstep. I stood outside listening, to terrified to enter.
“AHHHHHHH QUIT PLEASE!” the first voice pleaded. I had a very dominant feeling in the pit of my stomach that something was seriously wrong.
“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” demanded the second voice followed by a painful crash. I stood there in shock and then realized that I recognized at least one of the two voices.
I quickly whipped open the door and ran inside with no concern for my own personal safety. My house was pitch black but I continued running which resulted in tripping over something that had clearly been thrown out of place.
“YOU BASTARD JUST QUIT IT!” the first voice cried in pain. That plead was followed by a dramatic slap. That particular voice was strangely familiar.
“MIKEY?” I shouted up the stairs. My response was a possibly heavy object being thrown against the wall and cries of pain.
Suddenly a faint shadow came peering over the top of the stairs. My heart was racing.
Then to my complete and utter shock the shadow came running down the stairs, shoving me onto the floor.
My back ached in pain and the shadow disappeared out the door. I heard intense crying coming from upstairs. I pulled myself to my feet and started making my way to my bedroom. I moved as fast as I possibly could.
“Mikey, sweetie it’s me, Gerard,” I said softly. The crying continued and then I reached the top of the stairs. The only light in the room was that coming from the moon.
Mikey was lying on the floor nude, covered in blood, with my desk on top of his small weakened frame.
I ran over to my baby brother, who was noticeably in pain. I pulled the desk off of him and sat down by him, wrapping my arms securely around him.
“Are you okay? What happened? Who did this?” I asked all at once.
“Gee, he… he…. he…. raped me and… and… f…f….fought me,” Mikey confessed as tears streamed down his face like running water coming from a faucet.
“Oh sweetie,” I said softly while stroking his beautiful hair. I looked at his lower half. He had blood rushing from his genitals and entrance. I got up, being careful not to hurt him, and got a damp cloth from the bathroom. I sat back down and placed the cloth between his legs to gather the blood.
“Oh baby, I’m sorry,” I apologized feeling guilty for leaving him alone. The simplest way to put it is; I was selfish in wanted revenge against Frank and I ended up putting the love of my life in the face of danger because of it. I felt guilty although I’m sure Mikey would tell me that it’s “not my fault.”
I took him in my arms and felt his body go limp against mine. I kissed his bloodied cheek tenderly.
“Who did this to you honey?” I asked as I continued to stroke his soft, mangled hair.
“F….F….Fra….Frank,” Mikey confessed through his tears. I looked him straight in his eyes, which were bloodshot from crying. I felt the anger boil up in my veins.
“That bastard,” I thought to myself.
Chapter 11
After comforting Mikey in a brotherly way, I had a strong decision made that I would fight to the grave on.
“You have to see a doctor,” I said not trying to sugar coat what had happened.
“What Gerard? I’m fine!” Mikey insisted. I rolled my disbelieving eyes.
“No you’re not. Your body is torn. You’re seeing a doctor!” I declared, sounding like my overprotective mother.
“If I see a doctor will you get off my fucking case?” Mikey asked with a crude attitude.
“Yeah I will but with that attitude you’re not getting ANY sympathy what-so-ever,” I said with my own attitude. I got up and left the room.
I knew he was upset and that he had a good reason to be but I was so pissed that I didn’t take his feelings into consideration.
I went downstairs and feel asleep on the couch. In the morning I made Mikey an appointment with Dr. Cape to get checked out. I was awake for well over 3 hours before I had to wake Mikey up. I went back upstairs to wake him.
“Mike get up,” I said shaking him gently. He rolled over and rubbed his eyes. I handed him his glasses.
“I made up an appointment with Dr. Cape. We have to leave in 10 minutes so get ready,” I stated bluntly.
“Fine,” he said quietly. He got up and started dressing. I began leaving the room.
“Are you mad at me?” Mikey asked. I turned around.
“No, not really,” I answered blankly and went back downstairs. Within 5 minutes Mikey and I were in the car. The car ride was silent with little conversation. We arrived and waited for nearly a half hour until Dr. Cape’s assistant, Jodi, walked in.
“Mikey Way?” she asked looking around.
“Want me to go with you?” I asked Mikey. He nodded and we followed Jodi into Dr. Cape’s office.
“He’ll be here in a few minutes,” Jodi said. We waited patiently.
“Nervous?” I asked him. He swallowed hard.
“Yeah, wouldn’t you be too?” he asked.
I answered “yes” and then Dr. Cape walked in.
“Hello Michael. I see here that you are in need of a rape test?” he asked. Mikey blushed and nodded his head.
“Okay, no problem. Who is this and do you want him in here with you?” Dr. Cape asked pointing at me.
“He’s my brother and yes I do want him in here,” Mikey replied.
“Ok great,” Dr. Cape said and proceeded with the exam. He directed Mikey to remove his pants and then examined his lower half. Mikey was blushing but that’s expecting when you’re being touched by a complete stranger. Dr. Cape checked his entrance.
“You’re a bit torn up. We’re going to have to put some stitches in ya,” he stated. Mikey gave me a “you-got-to-be-kidding” look. Dr. Cape proceeded to stitch Mikey up. Mikey winced in pain a few times but overall took it well.
Dr. Cape then took a sample of the sperm that Frank had left behind in my poor baby brother.
“By chance to you know who did this?” Dr. Cape asked.
“No,” I quickly snapped. I hated Frank but I didn’t want him in jail. We finished talking to Dr. Cape, who said that Mikey should take it easy for a few days, and then we were released from the hospital. We started driving.
“I have a surprise for you,” I said to Mikey as we drove past our house.
“What?” he said with a better attitude than before.
“I’m taking you to Hawaii. I packed our shit last night and put it in the trunk last night,” I said trying to cheer him up.
“Really? Wow!” Mikey exclaimed. I drove to the airport. Mikey and I needed some romance after what happened. I just hoped he would be up for it.
Chapter 12
We arrived at the airport and boarded Flight 271. We took our seats. I sat by the window and Mikey got the isle. I took his hand in mine.
“What time is it?” He asked. I looked at my watch.
“2:40pm. The flight is 8 hours,” I replied and the plane took off. Mikey squeezed my hand.
“I’m sorry ‘bout having attitude with you earlier,” Mikey apologized. I brought his hand to my mouth and kissed it.
“Don’t worry about it sweetie,” I said placing my head on his shoulder.
“Tired?” Mikey asked. I nodded.
“Rest love and I’ll wake ya if you’re needed,” he said sweetly. I sat up briefly to kiss him.
“Love you,” I said laying my head back on his shoulder and then closed my eyes. It wasn’t long before I fell asleep. I was waked by Mikey’s hand gently stroking my package. I felt myself get hard. I opened my eyes and noticed that he had a blanket covering us.
“What are you doing?” I asked him quietly.
“I’m bored,” he announced.
“I’m hard,” I said stating the obvious.
“I’ll take care of that later but right now I have to pee,” Mikey said getting up from his seat. I sat patiently but got bored quickly. A genius idea hit me. I got up and went to the bathroom where Mikey was doing his “business.” I slammed on the door.
“Just a minute,” he said from inside the bathroom.
“Bullshit Michael. Open up it’s me,” I said and Mikey opened the door.
“What do you want?” he asked smiling.
“You,” I replied and shoved him back into the small room. I slammed the door shut and grabbed his waist and moved him against the wall. I kissed his neck and then moved up to his mouth. Our tongues battled and I moved my hands from his face to his chest to his zipper. I began unzipping his zipper and fucking turbulence hit! We were immediately thrown from the room onto the isle of the plane. The flight attendant told us to get back to our seats. We got up, embarrassed, and made our way back to our seats. Turbulence went on for a few minutes and then the flight was back to normal. Shortly after, we landed safely on the ground. We exited the plane and I looked at my watch. It read 10:17pm.
We got to the rental car and drove to the hotel. We checked into the Maui Aloha Hotel. I took my swimming trunks out of my bag and sat my bag on the bed.
“Grab your shorts and towel,” I told Mikey.
“Why?” he asked.
“Just do it,” I insisted. He got up off the couch and obeyed my command.
“Get changed,” I continued bossing him. We both got changed and I put a blindfold on him.
“What are you doing?” Mikey asked curiously.
“Do you trust me?” I asked avoiding his question.
“Of course I do. You’re my brother, why wouldn’t I trust you?” he answered.
“Good answer. Now follow me,” I said taking his hand. I led him out of the hotel and 4 blacks down to the ocean. The moon beamed on us beautifully.
Chapter 13
I led him to the edge of the ocean, letting the tide come in on our bare feet.
“Are we at the ocean?” Mikey asked.
“Shhh,” I said. I turned him around and took off the blindfold and threw it on the ground. Mikey gasped.
“We are at the ocean!” he exclaimed. He jumped up on me, wrapping his legs around my waist and arms around my neck. I placed a soft kiss on his cheek and began carrying him into the cold ocean water. I went in up to my chest and stopped. The moon continued to beam upon us.
“Gerard this is perfect. I love you,” Mikey whispered in my ear. I bashed my lips onto his. Once again our tongues battled. I rubbed my hand on his lower back and ass. He also stroked my back. We kissed passionately until Mikey pulled away.
“I feel bad,” he said looking me into the eye.
“Why baby?” I asked staring deeply.
“Because I wanna make love to you but I can’t,” he confessed.
“Still sore?” I asked lowering him into the water.
“Yeah,” he said with a deep swallow.
“Don’t worry about it love. I don’t love you any less,” I joked. Mikey laughed and began splashing me. I dove under the water and pulled his shorts to his ankles. I came back up.
“You’re awful,” he declared in a joking manner and then pulled up his shorts. I moved toward him and brought him into a hug. We held each other for a while, just listening to the sounds of nature. I felt Mikey shivering against my body.
“You’re shaking. Do you wanna go back up to the hotel?” I asked. He answered “yes” and we walked back to the hotel with towels wrapped around our cold bodies. When we got back to our room we got naked and climbed into bed together. We held each other until we fell asleep. We had such a wonderful night. Too bad our vacation was about to become a dramatic soap opera!
Chapter 14
I woke with Mikey in my arms. He was sound asleep. I sat up and heard somebody coughing. I looked over at the couch and there sat Frank! My jaw dropped and my heart stopped.
“Morning Beautiful,” Frank said enthusiastically. Mikey sat up beside me.
“What the fuck?” Mikey asked obviously shocked to see Frank.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Well I recently received an interesting package from the two of you and I thought I’d share it with everybody at the hotel. I made copies and put them outside every room!” Frank admitted.
“Also, I figured you’d like to view it with me!” he added and turned the TV on. There was Mikey and I fucking each other.
“Why the fuck would you do this?” Frank asked violently. I answered as the tape played.
“This is mild compared to you raping Mikey!” I screamed out.
“Shut the fuck up! I never did that to him!” Frank denied.
“Bullshit Frank! You did it. Fucking admit it!” Mikey yelled at him.
“Fuck. Fine, I did it and I’ll fucking do it again if you don’t shut up!” Frank threatened. Mikey then ran from the room sobbing and I lost my fucking cool. I shoved Frank to the ground.
“Threaten him again and I’ll fucking kill you. That’s a promise!” I scolded.
“Now you’re threatening me!” Frank stated.
“You’re fucking stalking us! How the fuck did you get in here?” I said loudly. Frank got up from the floor.
“You left me for Mikey!”
“You dared me to kiss him!”
“You destroyed the band!”
“You wrote a violent song about me!”
“You sent me a sex tape!”
“You raped my brother!”
We bickered like children. After I mentioned the rape Frank was speechless for the first time in his life.
I shoved Frank away from the door.
“What are you doing?” he asked me in a normal talking voice.
“Finding my brother!” I declared. I exited the room and slammed the door behind me.
Chapter 15
I ran down to the lobby and seen Mikey sitting alone at a table. I went and sat by him. He looked pissed off.
“Don’t fucking talk to me!” Mikey commanded. I was shocked.
“Why the fuck are you mad at me?” I asked baffled by his madness.
“Well let’s see. You insisted on making a sex tape because of a song! Now the entire hotel gets to view it! Good fucking idea, Gee!” Mikey said through tears. I wanted to hold him so bad but I knew he wouldn’t go for it.
“Mikey, I…”
“You better fix this shit between you and Frank or we’re done!” Mikey cut me off.
His comment made me want to vomit. He got up and left the table. I put my head in my hands and cried for hours. Eventually a young waitress came over to me. She was holding a dinner menu.
“Sir, can I get you anything?” she asked. I looked up and accepted the menu.
I quickly scanned through it. Nothing sparked my interest.
“Uh…” I started. Then I spotted the beverage section of the menu.
“Umm…” I continued.
“Would you like more time to decide?” she asked politely.
“Uh…No, can I just get a beer?” I asked.
“Right away Sir,” she obliged.
“Great thanks. Keep them coming if you would,” I stated, throwing my sobriety away. The waitress nodded and walked off to retrieve my order.
Chapter 16
After hours of drinking, I passed out. I have faint memory of somebody taking me back to the room but I don’t have the slightest clue of who it may be.
When I woke up the next morning Frank was sitting on the bed next to where I was laying.
“I was worried about you,” he said when I opened my eyes.
My head was pounding. I forgot what a hangover felt like.
“What? Where’s Mikey?” I replied quietly. Frank rolled his eyes.
“On a plane back to Jersey,” he started. “He found out about you drinking and was pissed so he left. He doesn’t care about you Gerard.’
“Screw him then,” I said defensively. Frank nodded.
“Who knows what could have happened if I wasn’t there,” Frank said letting his ego shine through.
He moved closer to me and pressed his lips against mine. His tongue begged for entrance and I granted it. Our tongues battled viciously. Frank’s hand traveled down my body and landed on my package. He began stroking it gently and proceeded to undo my pants. I pulled away.
“Frank, NO!”
“No what?”
“We can’t do this.”
“Gee, I love you. Why can’t we?”
“We’ve been over this. I love Mikey.”
“Mikey doesn’t want you anymore!”
“I don’t care. I’m not giving up that easily. I have to fight for him.”
Frank got up and walked toward the door.
“Fine,” he said in a depressed tone. He exited the room, leaving me alone.
Maybe I should have felt bad for that but I didn’t.
I grabbed my phone and dialed 514-4370, Mikey’s cell. After 3 rings, he picked up.
“Hello?”
“Mikey, it’s Gee. Where are you? Frank said you went back to Jersey,”
“No I didn’t. I’m at the ocean.”
“Wait. What? Frank told me you got pissed at me for drinking and that you left.”
“I was mad but I’m not anymore. Why are you listening to Frank anyway? He only wants to destroy us so he can get back with you.”
“You’re right. I shouldn’t be giving him the time of day.”
“Uh huh. Hey I miss. Come down to the ocean. We can spend some time together.”
“Yeah, that sounds fun. I’ll be there in a few minutes. I love you.”
“Love ya babe. See ya soon,”
We hung up the phone and I left to go be with Mikey.
Chapter 17
When I arrived at the ocean Mikey was laying on the ground on top of his sponge bob beach towel. I went and laid next to him.
“Hey Beautiful,” I said.
“Hey, Gerard listen. Don’t worry about the drinking thing. I’m not mad. I’m just glad to be with you,” he replied clearing the air.
“Ok good,” I said and kissed him on the cheek. Right after I kissed him two young girls approached us.
“Hey, Can we have your autographs?” the black haired girl asked. We nodded and signed their old MCR CDs.
“Thank you so much,” the red haired girl said.
“No problem. You girls have a nice day,” Mikey said and turned his attention to me.
“Months after the breakup and we’re still signing autographs,” Mikey joked.
“Die - hard fans,” I replied with a smile. We were watching two guys surfing. They were extremely good at it! I was envious.
“We should try that Mikes,” I suggested. Mikey laughed in disbelief.
“Uh no,” he answered, “but I do wanna try something.”
“What?” I asked innocently.
“Follow me,” he demanded taking my hand and leading me into the changing room.
“What are we doing?” I asked suspiciously.
“You talk way to fuckin’ much!” he exclaimed while ripping my shirt off my body.
“Mikey here?” I said shocked.
“Zip it,” he insisted and took off his shirt.
Chapter 18
After removing both our shirts Mikey smashed his lips onto mine and shoved his tongue in my mouth. We swapped spit with each other for a while and then Mikey began removing my shorts. I was already getting hard.
After he had me naked he pulled his shorts off and shoved two fingers in my mouth.
“Suck!” he instructed.
I obeyed him and after I sucked he placed his fingers at my entrance. He put one inside of me and slight pain shot through my body. He entered the second finger and the pain became more intense.
He began scissoring his fingers inside of me and then removed them. I was so hard it was becoming painful! He placed his cock slowly inside me and began thrusting.
“Harder!” I demanded.
He did as I said and thrust harder. He nailed my prostate and I screamed in pleasure and pain.
“AHH Mikey!” I yelled.
“I’m cumming!” Mikey announced.
AHH baby, so am I,” I seconded.
He released his warm cum inside of me and I released mine on our stomachs. We were breathing heavy.
I pulled him into a hug. While we were hugging I began stroking his back gently.
“I love you more than air,” I told him sincerely.
“Same to you baby,” he replied, “Let’s go back to our room.”
“Yeah let’s do that,” I answered.
Mikey grabbed his shirt and cleaned our bodies off.
He then grabbed his shorts and put them back on. I did the same and then took his hand in mine. I brought his hand up to my mouth and kissed it.
“You mean the world to me. You know that right?” I asked.
“Of course I know that,” he reassured me.
I led him out of the changing room and we walked back up to our hotel room.
Chapter 19
Wile we were walking back to the hotel Mikey informed me that he wasn’t feeling well. He said he had extreme stomach cramps and a painful migraine. He looked pale and his eyes were glassy. By the time we got back Mikey looked as though he was going to vomit. I heard him gagging and coughing as he ran into the bathroom. I went in by him and sat on the floor. I began stroking his back and caressing his hair as he continued to vomit.
“Are you okay?” I asked even though the answer was obvious.
“Nah,” he replied while spitting. His eyes were rolling to the back of his head. His body looked weak. I was extremely worried.
“Aw baby,” I said trying to comfort him. I sat there with him for nearly an hour. He looked up at me.
“Gee, I’ve never felt like this before,” he said as a single tear ran down his cheek.
“Aw come here,” I said taking him into my arms. He was shivering but when I placed a kiss on his forehead he was burning up. I held him tightly until I felt him pass out in my arms.
“Mikey?” I said unsure of what to do.
I carefully stood up and carried him onto the bed. I laid him there and got a cool rag. I gently wiped the rag over his flesh while I caressed his hair. He slowly opened his eyes.
“Hey,” I said with a relieving smile. He gave me a weak smile back.
“You look rough. Just rest for the night,” I instructed.
“Okay,” he said whispering. He closed his eyes and went to sleep. I sat there just admiring his face. He was sick but still beautiful. I took his glasses off and placed them on the nightstand. I kissed his head lightly and proceeded to clean up the room, which had been polluted with clothing. After hours of cleaning, it actually looked like humans had been staying there.
I went over to the bed where Mikey was sleeping and laid down beside him. I laid there for a while praying that he’d feel better in the morning and I eventually fell asleep.
When I woke up, Mikey was still sleeping soundly. I decided to call up room service for breakfast.
“Good Morning. This is Daniel. How may I help you?” said the man politely.
“Good Morning Daniel. This is Gerard Way. I was just wondering what I can get for a breakfast,” I replied trying to sound just as professional.
“Well Mr. Way, we have quite a selection,” Daniel started, “Some of our most popular items include a simple order of toast, bagels, pancakes, eggs and such.”
“That all sounds great but I need something for a light stomach,” I stated.
“In that case I would suggest something such as fruit or a soup,” Daniel suggested.
“Uh the fruit sounds good,” I decided.
“Of course and it will be there within 5 minutes,” he ended. I hung up the phone and went to sit by Mikey. I began stroking his hair. Just then there was a loud knock on the door.
“ROOMSERVICE!” a voice yelled. I got up and retrieved my order.
“Hey Mikey, wake up,” I said softly into his ear.
He didn’t answer.
Chapter 20
I shook him a bit and finally his eyes opened.
“Yeah,” he said weakly.
“I ordered us some food. How ya feeling?” I asked.
“Not the best,” he answered.
“Well try to eat something,” I said handing him a pear. He took a few bites and then stopped.
“Gerard, I don’t wanna worry you but could you please drive me to the hospital?” he asked. My heart about stopped!
“Yeah let’s go,” I said.
I drove as fast as I could to the hospital. I was going around 80 in a 55 zone so if I was pulled over chances are I’d end up in jail. Thankfully, I didn’t get pulled over.
When we arrived at the Koike Hospital I went with Mikey to the main desk.
“Aloha Gentlemen, how may I help you?” asked the red haired woman behind the desk. Her name was Kina and she was probably in her mid 30s.
“Uh Hi, my name is Michael Way. I was really sick last night and I’m still not feeling the greatest,” Mikey explained.
“Okay hun, you look pale so go and wait in that room. Dr. Zaire will be in soon,” Kina assured Mikey while pointing to Dr. Zaire’s office.
“Who are you? Father? Brother?” Kina asked me as I stood there dumbfounded.
“Brother,” I answered.
“Good. Now I’m assuming you’re over 18 so fill this out for Michael,” she said handing me a form. I quickly filled it out and handed it back to her. She looked it over quickly.
“You’re Gerard Way?” she asked.
“Uh huh,” I replied thinking a comment about MCR was to be made.
“We had an attempted suicide victim come in this afternoon and we found this in his pocket,” she explained handing me an envelope with my name on it.
“Who was the victim?” I asked curiously.
Chapter 21
“Frank Iero,” she answered. My heart began racing.
“Oh my God, is he alright? What happened?” I asked worried as I fought back tears. Truth is; Frank may have caused Mikey and I a lot of emotional pain but we have a history and that history will never disappear. We were together for years and he was a big part of my life. That won’t ever change.
“He’s in critical condition and he slit his wrists,” Kina explained trying to stay calm. I, however, was a mess.
“Uh thanks. I’m gonna go read this,” I said holding the envelope. She nodded. I went over to the waiting area and read the letter.
Dear Gerard,
I’m not sure if you’ll ever read this. I may be wasting my time but here’s what I have to say. When you broke up with me I fell to an all-time low. I was heartbroken and depressed. When Mikey confided in me about having romantic feelings for you I decided to play with them and dared you to kiss him. I had no idea that such an action would later become my greatest regret. I love you so much. I’d die for your happiness and since I’m causing you grief, I feel like I have to. I intend on ending my own life in your honor. Please attend my funeral with Mikey, Brian, Ray and Bob. You and the band were my life and since both are over, I have no reason to live. I’ll love you forever.
Love,
Frankie
By the end of the letter, I was crying hysterically and Mikey was standing in front of me with Dr. Zaire.
“I just told your brother about Frank Iero. He’s been asking to see you. I suggest you go now. He doesn’t have much time left,” Dr. Zaire said.
I took a deep breath and wiped the tears from my eyes.
“Uh okay,” I replied. We were pointed in the direction of Frank’s room.
“So what was wrong?” I asked Mikey.
“He said I had a minor case of food poisoning,” Mikey replied.
We walked into Frank’s room. He was lying there with large casts over his arms. His flesh was pale. I sat in the chair next to Frank’s bed.
“Frankie?” I asked softly. He barely opened his eyes.
“Gee, I love you,” he spoke quietly and closed his eyes again.
Just then Dr. Zaire walked in and the monitors went blank and made a drowned out beeping sound. I panicked.
“FRANKIE NO, C’MON MAN HOLD ON! DON’T GIVE UP!” I cried as Dr. Zaire tended to Frank who was slowly dying. Mikey grabbed my body and held me tightly.
“Gerard, I love you. I love you,” he said repeatedly in my ear. He then rocked me back and forth trying to be as comforting as possible.
“We lost him,” Dr. Zaire said remorsefully.
“NO!” I screamed and broke into tears. Mikey however showed no emotion.
Chapter 22
After receiving the horrible news about Frank, Mikey and I hopped on a plane and flew back home to Jersey. Frank’s body was also taken back for burial. We got home and called the guys about funeral information. None of them took it well. After making the calls, I felt vulnerable and needed Mikey.
“Mikey, I need you,” I said softly. He got up and climbed onto the reclining chair with me. He sat on my lap and started kissing me passionately. Our tongues glided over each other and eventually his kisses moved to my neck.
His hands began unbuttoning my shirt and placed kisses over my bare chest. He quickly removed his shirt and threw it to the floor with mine.
He then unzipped my pants and removed them also. It wasn’t long before he had me completely naked on the chair. He leaned down and placed a kiss on my penis before taking it in his mouth. I felt my cock hit the back of his throat. With each such I felt myself get closer to cumming.
After quite a few sucks I released myself into his mouth. He swallowed it easily. A sweet sensation of pleasure ran through my body. He removed his mouth and sucked on his fingers. He slowly entered them inside me and prepared my body. He then removed his own pants and placed his erection at my entrance. He entered himself slowly and started with slow, steady thrusts. He rapidly picked up speed, hitting my prostate easily. That wave of pleasure stole my body once again and our breathing became heavy. It was a bitter-sweet moment.
“I’m cumming,” he whispered releasing himself in my body. He then removed himself and pulled me into an embrace. I felt amazing. For the first time, I felt like we made love instead of just fucking. I then looked over at the clock.
“Shit Mikey, we have to go to Frank’s funeral,” I said softly. We kissed passionately once again, got dressed, and left for the funeral.
Chapter 23
We arrived at the church and I immediately noticed that everybody there was in black or red, similar to the “Helena” video.
I seen Frank’s father right away and Mikey and I went to comfort him. He broke into tears when he saw us and that made me break down also. After saying talking with Frank’s devastated family for a while we went over to Ray and Bob, our former band mates.
“Hey guys, where’s Brian?” Mikey asked, still showing no emotion.
“His wife went into labor last night so he couldn’t make it but he sends his remorse,” Ray explained. Bob looked at me. Tears were streaming down his face. I had never seen Bob cry before so it was hard.
”He was one hell-of-a guy,” Bob said sadly and pulled me into a hug. Mikey then grabbed my hand and led me up to the front of the church were Frank’s body rested in a coffin. Bob and Ray followed us. I looked down into the coffin. Frank’s pale, tattooed frame glared up at us. His eyes closed. His body clothed in his usual concert outfit. I was then reminded of the time, months ago, when I watched him sleep with his ipod in the bunk, only this time he wasn’t sleeping. He would never wake up. He would never speak to us again. He would never tell his dad that he loves him. He would never play his guitar again. Just that thought made me even more heartbroken. That and the thought of his father made me devastated.
Mikey, Bob and Ray all walked away, leaving me alone by Frank’s corpse.
“I’ll forever love you,” I whispered into the coffin and placed a rose in by his body. I reached my hand in the coffin and stroked his hand one last time. His flesh was freezing but was still as soft as the first time I ever held it.
“Goodbye Frankie,” I said and took my seat next to Mikey. The funeral director proceeded with saying goodbye to one of the world’s greatest guitar players.
The service lasted about an hour and I cried through it all. Mikey showed no emotion what-so-ever. After it was over Mikey and I hopped into the car and began driving home. We turned on the radio.
“Up next is a rare demo by the late Frank Iero. It’s entitled ‘Sorry,’” the DJ said and then played the demo.
“My love, my best friend
I hope you’re sorry for, tearing me apart
I am sorry for letting you go
No matter how the ball rolls
Or how hard the wind blows
How bright the sun shines
How hard the rain falls
How deadly the lightening may be
I will forever love you
You are my world
My sanity
My security
My reason for living
My reason for leaving
Aw baby I’ve decided to leave
I’m sorry for leaving you this way
My alternative is not apparent and could be nonexistent
I have no other choice
You’ll forever remain my love
My desire
My emotion
My pleasure
I’m sorry
Now, don’t shed your tears for me
Shed them for what we had
And what we’ll never get again
Let your final tear fall,”
His lyrics were beautiful. They were set to a dreary drum part with light guitar. His vocals were amazing. He was always my backup singer. If I had only knew what a talent he really was, he would have been singing lead too! Who am I kidding? He’s gone now and no matter how much I pray or how hard I cry, he’s not coming back. It kills me that I’m the reason he slit his wrists and it will forever haunt me. His lyrics, to both songs, will forever haunt me! I can only blame myself for his actions. I took a deep breath and looked at Mikey. He was beautiful. I know he hated Frank for raping him but none of that mattered when the rapist is in the ground. I forgave Frank at his funeral when I told him that I loved him. Mikey, however, will hold a grudge until he’s laid to rest. That’s fine, I guess. I still love Mikey more than life itself, although I don’t exactly love life at this moment. I took another deep breath and focused on driving. I swallowed hard and let that final tear roll down my trembling cheek.