I'm sorry. Is three words considered talkative now or do you just have a loose grasp of the English language? Perhaps it's all that time you spent in a tank.
HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF MY ANGSTY PAST THAT UMBRELLA IS SO RESPONSIBLE FOR YOU BAAASSSTARRRRD
>|
She does not know why you are taller and older and suddenly attractive, Wesker, but it MAKES NO DIFFERENCE to ALICE. She just finds your sudden attitude one more reason to WIPE YOU OFF THE MAP!one!1
[Oh yeah, she's a total BA. And sigh, now Wesker will actually have to move.
...Oh hai, he's behind you. That poor wall over there, you totally killed it dead. Good job, you can hit something!] You're starting to make me miss Jill, dear. [He COULD snap her neck but wouldn't that be like a lion hunting a cricket? It's so beneath him.]
[Wesker catches her ankle, holding her there. Lucky for her he enjoys lifting people by the neck rather than the leg. He considers hitting her in the babymaker just in case his alter-ego didn't take care of that pesky procreation problem because, honestly, clones are bad enough.]
[Sorry, there is no slow-mo here that is not reserved for unnecessary martyrdom to save partners or Wesker beating Chris' ass, thank you. This is his universe, lady, FUCK YOUR OVER-USED SLOW MOTION SHOTS.
He ducks under the shots easily before punching her in the face. With his mother-fucking-left-hand. Because his dominant hand is too good for Alice.]
......I don't think I can emphasize enough how much I love you.replaces_youSeptember 15 2010, 18:05:10 UTC
[/FLOOOOOOOOOOOORED]
[GDIT THE LACK OF SLOW-MO THROUGH HER OFF
THAT WAS IT.]
UGH!
[She clothes-lines in place from the force, and OH there goes her useless pistol AND the shotgun because lol necessary up-vulnerability for plot purposes WHAT HE NEVER PUNCHED THAT HARD BEFORE HOLY CRAP THAT WAS LIKE BEING HIT BY A CAR.
But WAIT this is ALICE. She knows KUNG-FU. She has a LOT of WEAPONS. She does NOT go down EASILY. Even if you did just bust her nose YOU IMAGE-WRECKING BASTARD.
Here, after a moment of recovering, she throws a SHURIKEN from her Batman-wannabe concealed tool-belt of AWESOOOOOME >O
BECAUSE LOGICALLY, IF HE CAN DODGE BULLETS, HAND-THROWING A PIECE OF METAL WILL TTLY WORK]
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NO YOU DIDN'T.
SHE IS TTLY THE HOTTEST CHICK UP IN HUR
HOTTER THAN ANYONE
ESPECIALLY JILL >:C]
[You just gon' get A Look >8|
and then an overdramatic, disbelieving Head Movement] Excuse me?
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A GENIUS IN LEARNING TO USE OUT-OF-DATE WEAPONS THAT ARE ILLOGICAL FOR A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE.]
[Oh, this look is not amused.
And JUSTLIKEDAT, she has drawn a gun. >|
AND HAVE AN AWESOME ONE-LINER TO GO WITH IT--YOU READY FOR THIS?
OKAY GO:]
I never did like men with a bad sense of humor.
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[Yeah. Schooled. And you know that even your super!!1awesome cloning power telekinesis of death can't hit the real Wesker, so bitch, please.]
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GIVE HER A SECOND, SHE'LL THINK OF ONE.
...
HERE WE GO:] ...Aren't you talkative all of a sudden. [A headtilt as she regards him over her gun] I don't like that, either.
[Pfffff she probably wouldn't even try to use them against him because she forgets she has them half the time.]
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>O
HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF MY ANGSTY PAST THAT UMBRELLA IS SO RESPONSIBLE FOR YOU BAAASSSTARRRRD
>|
She does not know why you are taller and older and suddenly attractive, Wesker, but it MAKES NO DIFFERENCE to ALICE. She just finds your sudden attitude one more reason to WIPE YOU OFF THE MAP!one!1
This gun. She FIRES IT.]
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But how? It doesn't look like he moved at all! Dear Alice, your aim is deplorable, what are you, five feet away? That is almost point-blank range.]
Perhaps the dunking impaired your aim as well. Fingers still pruney?
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...THE GUN MUST NOT HAVE FIRED
YES, THAT IS IT
AFTER ALL, WITH THE WAY THE GUNS IN THESE MOVIES CLICK INSTEAD OF BLAST, IT IS AN EASY MISTAKE TO MAKE
NOT THAT ALICE MAKES MISTAKES
So NOW she draws one of her Hydras (I'VE GOT A SHOTGUN) with her free hand and NOW SHE SHOOTS WITH BOTH IT AND HER HANDGUN
TOTALLY FOOLPROOF
AND BADASS TO BOOT]
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...Oh hai, he's behind you. That poor wall over there, you totally killed it dead. Good job, you can hit something!] You're starting to make me miss Jill, dear. [He COULD snap her neck but wouldn't that be like a lion hunting a cricket? It's so beneath him.]
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OOOOHHHHH NOOOOO
YOU DID NOT JUST SAY YOU PREFER VALENTINE OVER HER
NO ONE PREFERS VALENTINE OVER ALICE
ONLY RETARDED FANS OF THE GAMES WHO DON'T KNOW ANY BETTER
AND MARY-SUE POWERS ARE FAST, TOO, K
SO HAVE A ROUNDHOUSE KICK THAT TOTALLY OUTDOES VALENTINE'S, WHO ARE YOU KIDDING]
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OH WHO STUPID NOW, YOU INFERIOR VIDEO GAME CHARACTER?
YEAAAAAHHHH
'Cause with him holding her there, he is SO OBVIOUSLY STUCK NOW LOL
SO SHE BRINGS BOTH GUNS UP AND FIRES POINT-BLANK
UH-HUH
THIS IS SO COOL
DO YOU SEE THIS, AUDIENCE?
WAIT LET'S SHOW IT FROM FOUR DIFFERENT ANGLES
ONCE IN SLOW-MO
WITH CRAPPY ROCK MUSIC]
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He ducks under the shots easily before punching her in the face. With his mother-fucking-left-hand. Because his dominant hand is too good for Alice.]
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[GDIT THE LACK OF SLOW-MO THROUGH HER OFF
THAT WAS IT.]
UGH!
[She clothes-lines in place from the force, and OH there goes her useless pistol AND the shotgun because lol necessary up-vulnerability for plot purposes WHAT HE NEVER PUNCHED THAT HARD BEFORE HOLY CRAP THAT WAS LIKE BEING HIT BY A CAR.
But WAIT this is ALICE. She knows KUNG-FU. She has a LOT of WEAPONS. She does NOT go down EASILY. Even if you did just bust her nose YOU IMAGE-WRECKING BASTARD.
Here, after a moment of recovering, she throws a SHURIKEN from her Batman-wannabe concealed tool-belt of AWESOOOOOME >O
BECAUSE LOGICALLY, IF HE CAN DODGE BULLETS, HAND-THROWING A PIECE OF METAL WILL TTLY WORK]
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