Dealing with Doubts

Feb 12, 2008 20:37

Hello,
Lately this week, I have been swamped with all these doubts about how I see and percieve myself.  After starting therapy and feeling like I was headed in the right direction discovering my feminine identity and letting it out, doubts have sort of surfaced.  Most of the doubts surfaced shortly after I came out to my mother over a phone conversation or two in which she seemed fine with what I had to say at first, but then suspicious and almost accusatory a week later.  Basically, she was asking me, "Why are you dealing with this now?  Why do you feel you have to do anything?" - in reference to therapy and my feelings of wanting to deal with these identity issues finally after 20-plus years.  I think she has gotten into my head.  If she seems to doubt my sincerity and the seriousness of what I am trying to finally face, I begin to doubt myself too.

It's basically like this:  "Am I sure that I am doing the right thing?  How do I know for certain that I am a girl in a male body?  How do I know that this isn't just a phase of some kind?"

I think my Mom is looking for some sort of evidence out of me- something concrete that I can't readily provide.

Have any of you faced these kinds of doubts or situations before?  How did you folks deal with these feelings of doubt?

David/Sara

identity, identity-how did you know, i'm scared, questioning

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