Silver Lining 2/?raths_kittenSeptember 7 2010, 00:33:33 UTC
So that day, when Jensen lay in bed, not sleeping, watching the sunlight stream in through their shoddy blinds, watch them illuminate Jared’s features, he tried to bite back his jealousy, tried to imagine a life without Jared - and found that he couldn’t.
No, if anyone was going to take Jared out of this, it was gonna be him.
So the next night, Jensen fished out the business card Misha gave him one day and decided to call. Misha wanted him for porn. But not just your garden variety, or he would have said yes in a heartbeat. After all, where was the difference? But no, Misha catered to a different clientele. The job would involve gangbangs and things up his ass he didn’t want to think about. It involved whips and chains and quite possibly spilled blood and tears on his part. Misha didn’t believe in acting. He believed in reality.
But it would pay more than Jensen pulled in in a month. And he figured after a few of those movies on the side, hopefully not leaving too many marks on him so he could continue his ‘day job’, and he could provide for Jared. Not as good as fucking Mark would, with his own company and private jet and fancy apartment, but Jared wouldn’t have to whore himself out anymore. Not for anyone. Jensen would never demand anything in return.
**
”Don’t do it,” Jensen told him the next day, after he’d set up his first role call.
“Do what?” Jared pulled off his leather pants and Jensen winced when he spotted some fresh bruises on his thighs. He’d been with Mark tonight, he knew he had. Bastard.
“Go with him. Be his.” Leave me, he added silently.
“And why the hell not?” Jared asked. “Not like it would be any different from right now, except for better pay for less work.” He raised his eyebrow, daring Jensen to defy him.
“But you…” Jensen started, then stopped. …wouldn’t be with me anymore. We’d both be alone again. Was that what he wanted? Jensen sighed. “If you want to go, go.”
“I never said I wanted to.” Jared still hadn’t pulled on his boxers for bed, but nothing Jensen hadn’t seen before. Nothing countless other men hadn’t seen before. “Just that the offer is out. And I’m thinking about it.”
“Well, don’t.” Jensen repeated, then he realized his voice came out too harsh, because Jared was scowling at him. “I mean, what I was gonna… I just…” Jensen passed a hand through his hair and looked up at the ceiling. “If you want out, I can pull you along for a while. Before you maybe find a real job.”
”What?” The anger seeped out of Jared’s body and he shook his head. “Jensen…”
”I mean it. I’ve got some cash coming in. It’s gonna last us a while. If that’s it, if you really want out, I’ll support you.” Jensen gave him a tentative smile, but when Jared wouldn’t smile back, he frowned. “Unless you want to go with Mark. That it? You want to be his?”
“Oh, don’t be stupid.” Jared rolled his eyes. “Rich bastard thinks he can do whatever he wants, buy whatever he wants. ‘Course I don’t want to be.”
“So that’s it then? You’ll take up my offer instead?” Jensen was hopeful. He’d go through anything as long as it meant keeping Jared by his side.
Jared crossed his arms in front of his chest. “And what would that offer entail again?”
“Whatever you want,” Jensen promised. “Take as long as you need to find a better job. Stay in and sleep all day. I don’t care. I’ll take care of the apartment and I’ll take care of the food.”
“And what would you want in return?” Jared had stalked closer to him, gaze intense, and Jensen gulped. He hadn’t thought that far. He’d never… fuck, he wouldn’t be Mark!
“Nothing.” Jensen raised his chin, honestly a little hurt Jared would think that low of him. “I don’t want anything from you, Jared.” Just companionship. Sticking around. Keeping him from falling into a deep, dark hole and sinking in, once he’d be left on his own again. It was okay before. Before he knew better. But a life after Jared? It seemed impossible.
“Are you sure?” Jared sunk down on his knees in front of him.
“Jay? What are you doing, man?” Jensen’s voice faltered and he had to swallow hard. Jared was looking up at him seductively before going for his zipper.
No, if anyone was going to take Jared out of this, it was gonna be him.
So the next night, Jensen fished out the business card Misha gave him one day and decided to call. Misha wanted him for porn. But not just your garden variety, or he would have said yes in a heartbeat. After all, where was the difference? But no, Misha catered to a different clientele. The job would involve gangbangs and things up his ass he didn’t want to think about. It involved whips and chains and quite possibly spilled blood and tears on his part. Misha didn’t believe in acting. He believed in reality.
But it would pay more than Jensen pulled in in a month. And he figured after a few of those movies on the side, hopefully not leaving too many marks on him so he could continue his ‘day job’, and he could provide for Jared. Not as good as fucking Mark would, with his own company and private jet and fancy apartment, but Jared wouldn’t have to whore himself out anymore. Not for anyone. Jensen would never demand anything in return.
**
”Don’t do it,” Jensen told him the next day, after he’d set up his first role call.
“Do what?” Jared pulled off his leather pants and Jensen winced when he spotted some fresh bruises on his thighs. He’d been with Mark tonight, he knew he had. Bastard.
“Go with him. Be his.” Leave me, he added silently.
“And why the hell not?” Jared asked. “Not like it would be any different from right now, except for better pay for less work.” He raised his eyebrow, daring Jensen to defy him.
“But you…” Jensen started, then stopped. …wouldn’t be with me anymore. We’d both be alone again. Was that what he wanted? Jensen sighed. “If you want to go, go.”
“I never said I wanted to.” Jared still hadn’t pulled on his boxers for bed, but nothing Jensen hadn’t seen before. Nothing countless other men hadn’t seen before. “Just that the offer is out. And I’m thinking about it.”
“Well, don’t.” Jensen repeated, then he realized his voice came out too harsh, because Jared was scowling at him. “I mean, what I was gonna… I just…” Jensen passed a hand through his hair and looked up at the ceiling. “If you want out, I can pull you along for a while. Before you maybe find a real job.”
”What?” The anger seeped out of Jared’s body and he shook his head. “Jensen…”
”I mean it. I’ve got some cash coming in. It’s gonna last us a while. If that’s it, if you really want out, I’ll support you.” Jensen gave him a tentative smile, but when Jared wouldn’t smile back, he frowned. “Unless you want to go with Mark. That it? You want to be his?”
“Oh, don’t be stupid.” Jared rolled his eyes. “Rich bastard thinks he can do whatever he wants, buy whatever he wants. ‘Course I don’t want to be.”
“So that’s it then? You’ll take up my offer instead?” Jensen was hopeful. He’d go through anything as long as it meant keeping Jared by his side.
Jared crossed his arms in front of his chest. “And what would that offer entail again?”
“Whatever you want,” Jensen promised. “Take as long as you need to find a better job. Stay in and sleep all day. I don’t care. I’ll take care of the apartment and I’ll take care of the food.”
“And what would you want in return?” Jared had stalked closer to him, gaze intense, and Jensen gulped. He hadn’t thought that far. He’d never… fuck, he wouldn’t be Mark!
“Nothing.” Jensen raised his chin, honestly a little hurt Jared would think that low of him. “I don’t want anything from you, Jared.” Just companionship. Sticking around. Keeping him from falling into a deep, dark hole and sinking in, once he’d be left on his own again. It was okay before. Before he knew better. But a life after Jared? It seemed impossible.
“Are you sure?” Jared sunk down on his knees in front of him.
“Jay? What are you doing, man?” Jensen’s voice faltered and he had to swallow hard. Jared was looking up at him seductively before going for his zipper.
Reply
Leave a comment