Sunday is all about self care...
Lately I've been fairly constantly distressed and/or anxious. I've been making a fairly concentrated effort toward self care and applying coping mechanisms. Sometimes it works better than others but overall given it's been literally three years or so since I experienced anything near this level of constant anxiety, I am doing amazingly.
So this weekend has involved a simple rule, that whatever it is I planned to do, it had to:
a) add energy in important ways, and had to be at worst energy cost neutral
b) bring gentleness and ease to my experience
c) help me relax
d) remind me of all the ways I'm loved and connected to people I care about
e) play and have fun just for the sake of it
So far, I've managed this pretty damned well and I *am* feeling better. Still a little anxious but well within ordinary requirements for coping with living in the world :)
Friday night I went to the Swancon screening for 'The Dark Knight Rises' (will blog separately about my thoughts on the movie). I had dinner in a small group of people I'm close to and trust even with my prickly and struggling self. They were wonderful and formed a buffer around me so that I didn't need to speak or touch where I didn't want to - and there were no issues of that kind anyway, but it helped immensely to have taken care of it before anything *could* happen.
(Which is to say, if I hugged you Friday evening it's because I really and genuinely wanted to hug you)
Saturday was Christmas in July down in Rockingham with friends,
amarillion's Mum did amazing amounts of cooking, replicating their family Christmas spread that
prk,
amarillion and I have been waxing enthusiastically about for years. Again, people I love dearly and am close to even when I'm struggling and the day was relaxing and time wonderfully spent. We talked and hung out, we had quiet time as needed, we ate far too much and enjoyed wine together. It was wonderful - just like Christmas, only we were getting to have it with each other instead of our respective families and there's a loveliness to that.
Last night I played my first ever multiplayer computer game with
amarillion - we started a game of Civ5, so I am feeling more of a gamer girl than ever and it's an awesome feeling - I've always wanted to do this and I never felt I could because the games people were playing were not ones I was interested in playing regardless of whether it was multiplayer or not. This doesn't include WOW which I've never played but mainly because I expect I'll like it *too* much for the time and money I have available to spend. Also, watching some of the treatment of women in the guilds etc was pretty offputting and life's too short to put myself in the midst of that crap. But yay gaming!!! I had a ball staying up late and playing games last night. I'm so delighted!
Today is about anything I want. I've been reading blogs, listening to music, tucked up in bed with the puppy for cuddles. I have vague plans to paint my nails, watch some of the TV I'm following atm and maybe even go visit
hipikat later if I can bear to leave the house and if he can bear to have company (both things are 50/50 odds :P). I also want to write some letters and postcards and play more Civilisation V. And, if Posterous comes back up any time soon, I have some blogging I want to do.
So I'm not feeling like my usual shiny self, but I have it all in hand. This post is mainly to reassure people who've expressed concern and also to remind myself that I am the expert in me and how to take care of me, and I'm doing pretty awesomely doing just that.
soon, I'll consider food but more than likely I'll go for a pot of tea in preference.
This entry was originally posted at http://transcendancing.dreamwidth.org/857725.html
So this weekend has involved a simple rule, that whatever it is I planned to do, it had to:
a) add energy in important ways, and had to be at worst energy cost neutral
b) bring gentleness and ease to my experience
c) help me relax
d) remind me of all the ways I'm loved and connected to people I care about
e) play and have fun just for the sake of it
So far, I've managed this pretty damned well and I *am* feeling better. Still a little anxious but well within ordinary requirements for coping with living in the world :)
Friday night I went to the Swancon screening for 'The Dark Knight Rises' (will blog separately about my thoughts on the movie). I had dinner in a small group of people I'm close to and trust even with my prickly and struggling self. They were wonderful and formed a buffer around me so that I didn't need to speak or touch where I didn't want to - and there were no issues of that kind anyway, but it helped immensely to have taken care of it before anything *could* happen.
(Which is to say, if I hugged you Friday evening it's because I really and genuinely wanted to hug you)
Saturday was Christmas in July down in Rockingham with friends,
amarillion's Mum did amazing amounts of cooking, replicating their family Christmas spread that
prk,
amarillion and I have been waxing enthusiastically about for years. Again, people I love dearly and am close to even when I'm struggling and the day was relaxing and time wonderfully spent. We talked and hung out, we had quiet time as needed, we ate far too much and enjoyed wine together. It was wonderful - just like Christmas, only we were getting to have it with each other instead of our respective families and there's a loveliness to that.
Last night I played my first ever multiplayer computer game with
amarillion - we started a game of Civ5, so I am feeling more of a gamer girl than ever and it's an awesome feeling - I've always wanted to do this and I never felt I could because the games people were playing were not ones I was interested in playing regardless of whether it was multiplayer or not. This doesn't include WOW which I've never played but mainly because I expect I'll like it *too* much for the time and money I have available to spend. Also, watching some of the treatment of women in the guilds etc was pretty offputting and life's too short to put myself in the midst of that crap. But yay gaming!!! I had a ball staying up late and playing games last night. I'm so delighted!
Today is about anything I want. I've been reading blogs, listening to music, tucked up in bed with the puppy for cuddles. I have vague plans to paint my nails, watch some of the TV I'm following atm and maybe even go visit
hipikat later if I can bear to leave the house and if he can bear to have company (both things are 50/50 odds :P). I also want to write some letters and postcards and play more Civilisation V. And, if Posterous comes back up any time soon, I have some blogging I want to do.
So I'm not feeling like my usual shiny self, but I have it all in hand. This post is mainly to reassure people who've expressed concern and also to remind myself that I am the expert in me and how to take care of me, and I'm doing pretty awesomely doing just that.
soon, I'll consider food but more than likely I'll go for a pot of tea in preference.
This entry was originally posted at http://transcendancing.dreamwidth.org/857725.html