It was hard to ignore your child's pain. It had had a particular sense through the Force when Ben had brushed against Luke's mind, and in response he'd come to find his son. Feeling a bit guilty that he hadn't spent more time with his son on board, but knowing at the same time that Ben was sixteen now and also completely capable of taking care of himself, Luke came up the steps to this level of the Temple. It had a different layout than the one he was familiar with, but the effect was similar. One of calm, closeness with the Force.
And with the turmoil he was sensing in his son's mind, Luke figured Ben needed that.
"It's just me," he called softly, spotting Ben sitting among rippling reflections cast by the light on the water and making his way over. Luke didn't hide the concern in his voice or his presence. There were definitely some instances in which a Jedi was more than allowed to drop the mystique. "What's going on, Ben?"
At times like this, it was hard to believe he'd spent years avoiding his parents whenever possible. Here, now, his father's presence was the most reassuring thing in the galaxy -- or an infinite number of galaxies.
"I went to the ship," he said, eschewing all the normal lighthearted family banter. "I wanted my memories of the Ohm back, and I got them. It was like -- I've seen holos of the fall of Coruscant, and this was worse, because they were breaking the whole planet apart, and attacking the rest of the galaxy at the same time." He rubbed at his eyes with the sleeve of his plantsuit, not wanting to cry again. " I felt the whole galaxy die and I couldn't do anything about it."
Taking a seat beside Ben, Luke slid his arm around his son's shoulders, listening as he spoke. His own heart ached to hear the slight roughness of tears in his son's voice, to hear what he'd seen--what Luke must have seen, though he'd opted not to have his memories given back. Some things were better left alone. But it had been Ben's choice, and Luke would stand behind his son no matter what.
As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced.
"What could you have done then to stop them?" he asked gently.
"I don't know," he said brokenly. "Maybe taken out their command ship or raised an alarm. Or -- maybe I couldn't have done anything. But that doesn't help me feel any better about thousands of trillions of beings getting snuffed out. And I can't do anything about it now because... dad, I don't even know when it happened. We could have been in hibernation for a thousand years. What if there's not anyone left to help?"
That thought wasn't a happy one, and based on what Luke had found out when they'd stormed the bridge and rousted the pirates, it was very likely that the world he and Ben knew had been destroyed, along with many others. "There might not be," he agreed. "But we still have a responsibility to help those beings out there that still are alive, whether or not they're from the same place we are. I think the best thing we can do is to step up for them."
"I know." He paused, unsure how to articulate his jumble of emotions, the nagging doubts he had about everything that had happened. "I believe the ship about the Ohm getting Coruscant. What I felt... it was like mom on Kavan, but a thousand trillion times over. It felt like the Force, not some kind of trick. But I don't know what the best way to stand up for anyone is. Not against those things."
Rubbing Ben's shoulder absently (partly because thinking of how it had felt to lose Mara tugged a little bit on that wound), Luke was quiet a moment while he thought. Truth be told, he wasn't sure himself what exactly was expected of any of those who had awoken aboard. Save the multiverse was vague, even for a Jedi. How were they to take on this task? So many questions without answers.
Fortunately, there was a way to at least work on that.
"Neither do I, and neither does anyone else but Stacy and the Daligig, probably," Luke replied honestly. "It's something that either has yet to be told us, or that we have to come up with on our own. My credits'd be on the latter."
"That's what bothers me too," Luke said, looking thoughtful. "As much as I'm sure their motives are good, we can't do anything if we don't know anything." He looked sideways at his son, a bit of a smile playing around his mouth. "I seem to remember you're pretty good at finding things out. I've heard you've been asking questions since you got here."
"Then we keep asking." Luke looked at his son fully. "And if anyone can figure the right questions to ask, it's you. We find out as much as we can, tell the others, and go from there. It's what we can do."
Luke paused, brow furrowing. The thought of a hive mind reminded Luke entirely too much of the Kiliks, and how that had gone for Ben and for the other Jedi involved. Luke wasn't sure he was comfortable with it, though how much of that was because it was Ben suggesting it and setting off all of Luke's Danger To Your Child warnings he couldn't tell. It was a sound idea, but thinking of Ben or someone else aboard becoming like Raynar Thul wasn't a pleasant thing.
"I don't know," he said slowly. "If the Daligig haven't thought of that, it might be possible, though they could also have discarded it as too risky."
"But less likely to result in becoming a... what did your uncle call it? Bughugger?" He smiled, though it subsided back into that thoughtful look pretty quickly. "It is worth asking about, but whoever did it would have to be careful that they didn't get too attached."
And with the turmoil he was sensing in his son's mind, Luke figured Ben needed that.
"It's just me," he called softly, spotting Ben sitting among rippling reflections cast by the light on the water and making his way over. Luke didn't hide the concern in his voice or his presence. There were definitely some instances in which a Jedi was more than allowed to drop the mystique. "What's going on, Ben?"
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"I went to the ship," he said, eschewing all the normal lighthearted family banter. "I wanted my memories of the Ohm back, and I got them. It was like -- I've seen holos of the fall of Coruscant, and this was worse, because they were breaking the whole planet apart, and attacking the rest of the galaxy at the same time." He rubbed at his eyes with the sleeve of his plantsuit, not wanting to cry again. " I felt the whole galaxy die and I couldn't do anything about it."
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As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced.
"What could you have done then to stop them?" he asked gently.
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Fortunately, there was a way to at least work on that.
"Neither do I, and neither does anyone else but Stacy and the Daligig, probably," Luke replied honestly. "It's something that either has yet to be told us, or that we have to come up with on our own. My credits'd be on the latter."
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"I don't know," he said slowly. "If the Daligig haven't thought of that, it might be possible, though they could also have discarded it as too risky."
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