How Do You Do It?
Carly, I don't hate you.. and, take Vera out for a run. Vera, Carly isn't a screw-up leaver her alone. You two should stick together, and be better to eachother. It's times like these that I wish I had a sister, even if she was a step sister, or a brother, but I don't have anyone left. I mean, no one from my immediate family... There's just... I can't deal with this.
My question to Merlin, is how do I do it? How do I avenge my fathers death? The only way I can do that is by killing my mother and her new whatever-he-is... And I can't kill my mother, no matter what she did to my father... And, I need to stop crying, I have a migrane, and Carly's worried about me, and Vera's being... Caring.
I can't keep running from my problems can I? I moved to France, but that didn't help, and I moved to America, and where did that get me? Right back here, to the estate.
I couldn't believe it. I woke this morning, to a letter from mother about my Dad, and then I went to the library to read one of Dad's books to find them all destroyed, I couldn't believe it... I just, couldn't understand... I'm still crying, I'm still in the library, and I've been here for nearly six hours, reading the torn pages of my fathers books. One of my last solid memories of him. My childhood, when he used to read to me...
So, I guess this is where the partying ends for me, this is where I turn into the Emmeline that my mother needs to fear. Because I wont let her destroy my father, she will die for what she did... No matter how hard it will be for me.
Emmeline