Title: Uncrossing the Stars
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Characters: Sam, Martouf/Lantash, Daniel, Jack
Pairings: Sam/Martouf/Lantash
Category: Angst, Drama
Warnings: None
Summary: Sam thought she had lost it all, mostly by her own hand, and the knowledge that she would never got the chance to tell him how she felt gnawed at her. But she would not let it end like that. In the end, she found a way to save them.
Rating: T
Prompt: 187. SG-1, Samantha Carter/Martouf|Lantash, she found a way to save them.
Chapter Three: The Ghost of a Memory
The Ancient device sat innocently on Sam's desk, buzzing like a hummingbird's wings. It was a relatively small device that fit in the palm of her hand and had a separate attachment that looked for all intents and purposes like a laser pointer, but it was made of carbide and had a flat tip with a divot like the nock of a crossbow arrow. There was a small crystal seated in the divot and it pulsed between green and blue hues like a heartbeat.
After running an exhaustive gamut of tests, Sam was still uncertain of the device's true purpose, but she was fairly certain that it could be use to alter a person's memories. She had no way of testing the device, which she referred to as a Memory Deprogrammer, without irreparable consequences.
"So, how does it work?" asked Daniel, curiously looking the device over from all angles.
Sam shrugged. “Honestly, I don’t know. I have no idea what it really is, but I do know that it emits some sort of electromagnetic field which does not seem to be harmful. According to the documentation that came with it from Area 51, it completely erased the last two years worth of memories of the three scientists who tried to activate it.”
Daniel glanced at the device then back at Sam. “So, what you’re saying is that our asses are going to be saved by sheer incompetence this time? No offense.”
“None taken,” she said, trying to keep the frustration out of her voice. "But you’re right.”
“Okay, so say we can get permission to take this device to the Tok’ra. How do you activate it without wiping your own memories of the last two years in the process. It sounds like the failsafe is automatically activated the moment this thing is turned on.”
“That’s the part I haven’t entirely figure out yet,” she admitted.
She sat down and laced her fingers together. Her eyebrows furrowed together in deep thought.
Daniel sat down opposite her, on the other side of the device, and studied her analysis of the device. “But you have thought about it so what are our options here?”
Sam sighed. She had spent the better part of the afternoon trying to come up with a viable course of action but none of them were without their shortcomings. “Option one: I activate the device and lose the last two years of my memory, too. Option two: we find someone else who is willing to activate the device and sacrifice the last two years of their life which is not likely and therefore not a valid option. Option three: we find a way to remotely activate the device so that only Martouf is affected. Option four: we wake Martouf up, hope he doesn’t try to kill himself again, and get him to activate the device.”
“But if we bring Martouf out of stasis, the first thing he will do is try to commit suicide. That was the failsafe that was implemented with the zatarc programming,” said Daniel.
He was right, of course, and that was the exasperating part. It would be so simple if they could bring Martouf out of stasis and have him activate the device himself, but nothing was ever simple. Sam had always heard that anything worth having was worth fighting for but, just once, she wished that things could be easy.
She stood up and started to pace the length of the table, wringing her hands. “I think our best option is to find a way to rig this device so that we can remotely activate it from a safe distance.”
It was easier said than done. Interfacing their technology with the Ancient’s technology was like mixing apples and oranges. It was not impossible, that was a word that she had struck from her vocabulary when she joined Stargate Command, but Sam was not convinced that she could do it in the time allotted.
Regardless, she was damn sure going to give it her best effort.
Her lab table was stacked with equipment and she had already begun to map out the best way for combining the two technologies in an effective way. All she had to do was turn the device on so in theory she could build something similar to a remote car starter. She would need a transmitter and a receiver to accomplish the task.
She snapped her fingers. “Walkie talkies.” It was so simple. She had been trying to overcomplicate it, but the answer had been right there in front of her face all along.
“I’m sorry, what?” said Daniel, confused.
Sam dug through the pile of equipment and pulled out two walkie talkies. “One would function as a transmitter, transmitting the signal to the other, the receiver, which in turn activates the device. All we have to do is attach the receiver to the device.”
Daniel turned the walkie talkie over in his hand. “How?”
“Like this,” Sam replied.
Two hours later, Sam had spliced the second walkie talkie to the Ancient device and slaved it to the first one which would act as the transmitter.
She held up the first walkie talkie in triumph. “With the push of this button, the receiver will safely turn on the Ancient device and, if all goes well, only Martouf will be affected. The last two years of his memory should be completely erased, including the zatarc programming, rendering him harmless and ordinary.”
Daniel was not one hundred percent convinced. “Harmless and ordinary? I don’t think those two words ever described Martouf.”
“You know what I mean,” said Sam. “He won’t be a threat to himself or others any longer as far as the zatarc programming is concerned anyway.”
“Which brings us to the next question: does he have to be awake in order for this to work?”
Sam nodded in the affirmative. “Yes, but not necessarily lucid. We could bring him out of stasis but keep him somewhat sedated so that he is awake but not aware of himself.”
Daniel eyed the Ancient device and the walkie talkies. “Is it ready?”
Sam fingered the transmitter with a sense of dread building in her stomach like a cocoon of butterflies nearing the point of emergence. “The only way to know is to test it.”
“Let’s go find, Jack,” said Daniel, jumping to his feet with a purpose.
Jack was not interested in the minuet details. He was only interested in the process, specifically whether or not it was going to put any of his team members in danger. Once he was satisfied that no one was going to lose their memories by accident, he acquired permission from the General to embark for the Tok’ra base.
Sam’s heart was racing with anticipation and anxiety as she walked through the tunnels toward the stasis chamber. The cocoon of butterflies in her stomach burst when she saw him lying on the crystal table. The healers had moved him from the stasis chamber to the crystal bed in anticipation of her return. He was heavily sedated to keep him from waking up before they were ready to rouse him but his body was burning through the sedative quite rapidly thanks to Lantash so they had to work quickly and efficiently.
Elise and Malek were waiting for her just inside the door. They both wore identical expressions of restrained curiosity. They had not been able to built a device to counteract the zatarc programming and they were curious to see if Sam had been able to do it where they had failed.
“How is he?” she asked, placing her bag on the table beside the bed.
“Stable,” replied Elise. “The effects of the medication will wear off soon. Are you prepared to start your experiment right away or do you need a few moments?”
“I need a few minutes to set everything up,” said Sam. “Have you completely evacuated this part of the base? We don’t want to erase anyone else's memories as a by product of negligence.”
Malek reassured her. “There is no need to worry, this section of the base has been sealed off from the rest of the compound.”
He and Elise left to double check that no one had wandered into that part of the base and Sam began to set up her equipment.
She gently placed the Ancient device on the side table and made sure that the receiver was still attached properly. It was still humming and it was slightly warm from being jammed in the backpack for so long. Sam turned on the receiver and pocketed the transmitter.
Martouf had to be conscious in order for the device to effect him so she waited for him to stir. She sat down beside him on the bed and gently brushed her hand across his. It was warm to the touch and her fingers tingled where they had come into contact with his skin.
Sam laced her fingers into his like she had done on that first day on the sand dunes. Like that day, something about it just felt right. “Martouf? I don’t know if you can hear me - it seems like I’ve been saying that a lot lately - but even if you can, you won’t remember this conversation later if everything goes well. I wanted to tell you that, no matter what happens, I’m going to be here for you. If this works, I’m going to help you get through it because it’s sort of my fault that you’re like this anyway, and I still feel guilty about shooting you just FYI, and it’s definitely going to be my fault that you don’t remember anything from the last couple of years so don’t worry about a thing. I’ve got you covered.”
She felt his fingers tighten around hers and he moaned softly as he started to come around.
It was time.
She leaned over and impulsively kissed his forehead.
In the end, she did not know how far the device would reach so she had overestimated the distance in an attempt to be safe rather than sorry.
“Ready?” Daniel asked when she reached the safe zone.
“As ready as I’ll ever be,” she said uncertainly.
Malek looked unconvinced. “Are you certain that we are safe here?”
Sam took the transmitter out of her pocket and turned it on. “If you would rather wait on the surface, I suggest you leave now.”
The base commander appeared to weigh his options. “I will stay.”
“Sir?”
Jack shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere, Carter.”
Sam’s heart was roaring in her ears as her thumb hovered over the button that would change so many lives forever. She took a deep breath and depressed the call button. The sound of static filled the air but there was no need to hold the button down so she let it go and in the silence that followed she could have heard a pin drop
"What now?" asked Jack impatiently. "Did it work?"
"I don't know," replied Sam.
She had rigged the walkie talkie attached to the Ancient device with an automatic timer that would turn it off after ten seconds, but she had also built in a manual override that would turn the receiver off in the event that the timer suffered a catastrophic failure. She wanted to make sure the device was turned off before she allowed anyone to approach the stasis chamber. She depressed the call button three times in rapid succession and waited for the indicator light she had installed to turn red.
Jack removed his Beretta from its holster. "Let's find out."
Sam's heart skipped a beat. "Sir, I don't really think..."
"Until we know otherwise, we consider Marty a viable threat and we treat him as such. Draw your sidearm, Major."
As much as she hated to admit it, Jack was correct. She pulled an identical Barrera M9 from her holster and made sure that it was cocked and locked. She flipped the safety off and followed Jack through the corridor and back to the isolation chamber.
With every step she took, horrible thoughts filled her head. She imagined the worst possible scenarios: Martouf dead on the floor, having took his own life as a result of her failure interfacing their technology with the Ancient device, Martouf attacking them when they entered the room and forcing them to put him down again, and other horrible things, but when they rounded the corner and stepped into the room, Martouf was lying on the bed with a dazed expression on his face.
"Martouf?" she asked gently. "Are you alright?"
He sat up and rubbed his head as if he had a bad headache. "Samantha Carter?"
Sam lowered her gun slightly, but still kept her finger on the trigger. "Yes, that's right. You remember me?"
He raised his head and locked his gaze with hers. "Of course, we met a few days ago." He surveyed the room, his expression darkening. "What...what has happened? Why am I in here?"
Jack stepped toward him, his gun still leveled at Martouf's chest. "You feeling alright, Marty? Any headache, nausea, homicidal or suicidal urges?"
Martouf looked at Jack with a shy smile, blatantly ignoring what he probably thought was an asinine question. "And you are...O'Neill, correct?"
"That's right? You remember anything else?"
Martouf's eyebrows furrowed as he tried hard to recall the last thing he remembered. "The base was under attack but we escaped with Samantha's father, Jacob Carter, the new host to Selmak. Did something happen after that?"
Jack holstered his weapon. "Yeah, about two years. Carter, he's all yours."
Martouf crinkled his nose in confusion. "Two...years."
"It's a really long story," she said, cheering internally at her success. "I'll tell you all about it, but Elise wants to evaluate you first."
"Evaluate me for what?"
Sam returned the ancient device to the backpack and tried not to smile too much. "To make sure you're okay. You've been through a lot in the last few weeks and we almost lost you. Luckily, Lantash was able to heal your physical wounds and I was able to devise a way to restore you, uh, mentally so to speak. Unfortunately, it came at the expense of your memory, specifically the last two years of it."
Martouf was speechless and they stared at one another for a long time. "I do not remember anything like what you speak of happening, nor does Lantash. Please tell me what happened."
Elise walked in and approached the bed. She nodded at Sam and Sam nodded back. "Later. I have some explaining to do for the council but I'll see you afterward and we'll talk, okay?"
Martouf visibly wavered between disappointment and uncertainty. "Okay."
There was a part of her, a very large part, that wanted to stay with Martouf and tell him how she felt,but that was a conversation that would have to wait, possibly for a long time, until they got to know one another all over again. Maybe this time they could do it right.
It was difficult to rightly express her emotions at that moment. They were all tangled up in knots and inseparable from one another. Her elation at saving him was clouded by an uncertain future and her feelings for him, as confusing as they were, were marred by his memory loss of the time they had spent together.
She found herself standing in the middle of the corridor, frozen in thought, unable to move forward but unable to go back. She had saved him. She had done the impossible yet again. She had kept her promise, a promise he did not know she had made. But what was to become of them now? Without the trials and missions that had made them who they were, what would they become? Was it enough that she had saved him? If they took a different path this time, could she be the one to watch him from a distance and keep her feelings inside? Was this how he had felt before?
Sam leaned against the wall and held her face in her hands. Her heart actually hurt at the thought. Just when she knew that he truth, just when they finally had a chance to open up to one another, this happened. It was heartbreaking.
Two tears slid down her cheek and she quickly wiped them away. One, she knew, was for her. The other was for him.
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