I'm crazy.
Seriously. I just have to be mentally ill for me to be this .... retarded.
Honestly. I feel like pooh. Yeah I'm PMSing but I still don't tihnk that's the whole story.
I worked all week on the music we got and I help a bassoonist who has been playing for liess than 2 years to play grade 5 and 6 music and it was great for both of us, and I still feel like I'm not good enough.
Dr.Kirkpatrick invited me to be part of her college band. And Mr.Bocook, who is pretty famous, says that I play beautifully and I play with all the characteristics of the bass clarinet ..like that's the reason you have that part on the bass clarinet. Could I get a higher compliment than that? I doubt it. So why do I feel so bad?
I just don't understand myself. How could I sit here and feel like I underachieved? How messed up do I have to be to have that mentality?
And that leads me to the conclusion that I am just insane.
Truely.
Other than that, my manager scheduled the one day that I can't work this week and that's all. I'm so mad at him right now. I do'nt want to loose my job but I'm not working on saturday. Period. GAH. MEN! If Sarah had made the schedule she would've done it right.
Rachel is coming over soon. And then the rest of that side of my family will be here tomorrow. And then I'm going out around 5..ish? ANd coming home..late. Since I don't work ever this week!!!!
I should go get my paycheck.
I should kill Eric..
Yeah that's all I have to say.
Honestly. I feel like pooh. Yeah I'm PMSing but I still don't tihnk that's the whole story.
I worked all week on the music we got and I help a bassoonist who has been playing for liess than 2 years to play grade 5 and 6 music and it was great for both of us, and I still feel like I'm not good enough.
Dr.Kirkpatrick invited me to be part of her college band. And Mr.Bocook, who is pretty famous, says that I play beautifully and I play with all the characteristics of the bass clarinet ..like that's the reason you have that part on the bass clarinet. Could I get a higher compliment than that? I doubt it. So why do I feel so bad?
I just don't understand myself. How could I sit here and feel like I underachieved? How messed up do I have to be to have that mentality?
And that leads me to the conclusion that I am just insane.
Truely.
Other than that, my manager scheduled the one day that I can't work this week and that's all. I'm so mad at him right now. I do'nt want to loose my job but I'm not working on saturday. Period. GAH. MEN! If Sarah had made the schedule she would've done it right.
Rachel is coming over soon. And then the rest of that side of my family will be here tomorrow. And then I'm going out around 5..ish? ANd coming home..late. Since I don't work ever this week!!!!
I should go get my paycheck.
I should kill Eric..
Yeah that's all I have to say.