The petit blonde has landed!
Hi all,
Apologies for not having written before but see below!
So we've been in Sweden for 40 days and here is a summary of life so far, but feel free to scroll down fast if you are very bored:-
- Day 1: slam space bar thumb in hotel door on leaving for new house in Domsten. Arrive in tears with blood soaked hanky at new house. I wonder if thumb is broken, movers look nervous and wonder if I am still able to make them endless cups of tea. Enter house and within 30 mins the lights in the bath/sauna room blow, followed quickly by the lights in the master bedroom!
- Day 2: decide thumb isn't broken as have too much unpacking. First day of school for the girls. Natalie selects appropriate outfit; mini demin shorts, strappy crop top showing black bra straps and navel, turquoise leg warmers and a look which defies me to make comment. I do nevertheless and ask if she is auditioning for America's Next Top Hooker. The irony is lost on her, but effect of her outfit isn't as youngest mover trips on his tongue and drops a box marked fragile as Natalie tosses her hair and strides to the car. Niels drives girls to school and receives first parking ticket demanding ransom of a month's salary.
- Day3: thumb swollen to size of tree trunk, back to wondering if it is broken but continue unpacking. Natalie chooses another outfit, skinny jeans, black crop top showing off white bra straps and a trilby hat. I blame Kate Moss.
- Day 4: movers leave, just as well as the youngest is now completely smitten with Natalie and clearly has made plans to elope with her so took the precaution of hiding the very long ladder in the back of the garage. Pick up bewildered cat from luxury hotel and take him to Domsten house, give children strict instructions to keep Jelly (cat, not wobbly desert) in house for a long as possible so he has time to adjust. After 20 minutes decide to let him out as we can't stand the yeowling - he shoots straight up a tree after the over enthusiastic neighbour's dog greets him. Wearily unearth very long ladder out of back of garage .....
- Days 5, 6, 7 and 8: continue unpacking, all conversations begin one of three ways; 'Have you seen...?' 'I can't find...' or 'Where the bloody hell is the f..ing ....?'
- Day 9: I drive the girls to school, am stopped for speeding and breathalysed at 8 in the morning. I play both the English and the broken thumb card, waggling the bandaged thumb and explaining very loudly that it's hard to change gear without a thumb. Policeman seems sympathetic about the thumb, less so about the speeding.
- Day 10: Still no sign of broadband company and magic internet box. Niels has first of many verbal punch ups with voice on phone.
- Day 11: Shopping trip to local Ikea, enter with long list, exit with three chair covers but no chairs - out of stock!
- Day 12: Return chair covers to Ikea, realising covers are probably useless without chairs. Vow never to shop again at Ikea.
- Day 13: glorious weather, all of Helsingborg on bikes. In a fit of enthusiasm, I agree to join Niels on long bike ride along coastal path. Takes 3 hours to find key for bloody bike lock, meanwhile clouds have gathered. Niels decides to go for a swim, I sit on the beach and admire his courage though I can't help but notice that things shrink considerably in cold water.
- Day 14: glorious weather so mount bike and cycle to next village - all very picturesque and charming, fabulous views, friendly Swedes, thatched fishing cottages renovated to perfection. Idyllic. Return home and find my nether regions haven't felt so bruised since childbirth. Have to sit with bag of frozen peas between legs. Beg Niels to adjust seat on my bike so I can touch the pedals.
- Day 15 - 30: Unpacking, unpacking, more unpacking. Make numerous trips to Ikea - every other trip to return a purchase. Girls settle into school, make friends and complain they have nothing to wear. Computer and broadband finally hooked up - horray! Radio 1 for the girls and Radio 4 podcasts for me!
- Day 31: join gym. Am shocked by fitness level of the Amazonian women - instead of going to the corner, leaning heavily on the wall for a chatt and a giggle between exercises, they actually keep their feet moving as instructed. Furthermore as I haul my sweaty body into the car they all cycle home! I consider this unnatural. I suspect it is probably alsounhealthy; poor dears, don't they realise they're all going to look more gaunt than slim?
- Day 40: miss friends, the Sunday papers, any product made by Cadburys, marmite, property programmes on telly, binge drinking - even miss bloody Tescos! Book return trip to Britain.
By the way, in case of the more sympathetic amongst you were wondering, think the thumb was broken but now able to type as proven by this blog!
Miss you all,
Petit Blond