Yes sir

[tracethoselips]

So, tomorrow is the big day. I start filling out the application for The National Guard. Phew I'm so scared. I feel like I'm going to be signing my life away. I can't help but think I'm not going to make it through basic training. I'm going to die. I'm in great physical condition. I can mentally block out someone screaming at me 24/7...but for some reason I'm just scared. 8 weeks....my whole summer, gone to basic training. In the long run though, I'll have so many benefits. I'm talking to my sister now online. Tomorrow will be 4 years that her husband had been dead. He was like a blood brother to me, my everything. I hate thinking of it. 4 years! Where has the time gone? I still wake up everyday hoping to hear his voice. Sometimes...I swear I do. I miss him so much. My life has never, and will never be the same without him. I try so hard to live up to what I feel he will be proud of because I know hes watching over me. He's protecting me. Nothing feels right though. Everything I do feels wrong without him here. I want him here to help walk me through life. The only person who I trust is gone. He was my best friend. My world. He showed me so many things. He opened my eyes so many times. Tomorrow I sign those papers and I pray that he's right there with me. I hope he's proud. I hope he'll be there that day when I graduate basic training in my suit, with a smile so wide....I did this for him.

Joseph Boyd
1973-2000
Love is everlasting