Oh Louis, always whining...

[traceroo]

I am actively procrastinating right now. I should be working on my final paper for my Legal Research class; it's worth 25% of my total grade. I had three weeks to work on it, and I blew off the first two. It'll be a whopper of a topic, too -- researching case law on airline liability when a commercial flight crashes due to pilot negligence.

Comments

Re: (Insert appropriate title here)

[traceroo]

You're awesome. :) Thanks for the long-distance hug by way of your heartfelt words (or tink of the glasses, however you wish to memorialize it in metaphor). I appreciate knowing that you understand what it's like to be in this boat -- and I appreciate the boot in the ass!

It's avoidance -- maybe a little laziness! I keep hoping, "This month is the month!" and it's not necessary... but after eight months, that sure rings hollow. I'm not afraid that I don't really want a baby; I'm good with that decision. I'm mostly afraid of some sort of brand of FAILURE YOU'RE A TERRIBLE FAILURE AS A WOMAN BECAUSE YOU'RE OLD AND DRIED UP MIGHT AS WELL BOTTLE YOURSELF AS A LICHE YOU OLD BAG... ya know. Like ya do. It doesn't have to make a lot of logical sense... Or I fear that the answer is there, the solution is there, but it will be very, very expensive. The idea that we could have a baby if only we were rich enough to pretty much BUY one is horrifying to me in a lot of ways -- not the least of which is simply the question of how to pay for it. Again, sort of a fucked up issue, but there it is.

Ahhh! What would I do without late-night LJ lurkers? Thanks for being here for me tonight. :)

Trace

Re: (Insert appropriate title here)

[sans_peur]

I assume you've checked for coverage from your insurance? My friend managed to get either 3 or 4 of her rounds covered. Also, if you haven't already been evaluated for it, see about getting checked for PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) which is a common interferer-of-things-baby.

And that first call and appointment isn't the $20K commitment - it's "just" a doctor's appointment at first. It'll be some evaluation and some serious (and scary) talk about viability at your "old" age (@#$! 28 years' old is "old" for egg harvesting...grrr). Maybe just getting past this call hump (no pun intended) will get you relaxed enough that nature does its thing!

Re: (Insert appropriate title here)

[traceroo]

No insurance coverage for Ian or me; we checked. Still, even the full committment on IVF is still less expensive than adoption, if not a sure thing. The initial consultation is like $250 -- easy money. That will at least give us some information and options. There's a lot of tiny steps between here and full on in vitro, so we'll see what they say.

Oh, no other symptoms of PCOS -- and Ian and I have each conceived previously in life, to various ends. We know for certain that at one time I was fertile, and we have no reason to believe otherwise for Ian. Natch, I'm sure a round of testing will be early on the agenda in the next process.

I'm calling this morning! :)

Trace