Restless in Texas
This week I'm feeling a little tapped out emotionally. Yesterday, my very good friend kajivar had to let go of her cat Tristan who was 13. I've known Tristan since she got him, and his sudden passage from this world, and sympathy for his mama just hit me like a ton of bricks.
On top of that, I hate to admit it, but I can't help but feel there's a little truth to the concept of Seasonal Affective Disorder. This sounds like the stupidest, most ridiculously made-up ailment I've ever heard of in my life! Yet I can't deny that when the weather it grey and rainy and blah as it has been here off and mostly on for the past week, I just feel worn down by it. The sun comes out, the weather turns warm, and it's like WALL-E charging his solar batteries for me! I perk right up! It's sunny and clear here today, but still chilly, windy like mad, no open windows. I miss sunny warmth and I'm ready for it to arrive.
Then, like so many people, I'm feeling worn down by the noise surrounding Healthcare Reform. I don't intend to talk about the actual issue here and now -- but gee whiz, I'm just tired of all the noise surrounding it, and so much of it mean and crazy. Noise noise noise! I've told Ian that I'm getting to the point where I don't even enjoy watching "The Daily Show" as much as I used to because political talk in general just brings out the worst in me, and raises my blood pressure (even if Jon Stewart keeps me laughing the whole time).
Mostly I'm just ready to move, ready to move on. I hesitate posting stuff like this because I always feel a little guilty. Through the past year, I've received so many reminders, some kind, some incredibly unkind, that many people would love to have the endless free time that I do. Noted. Many people would also like to have the sense of purpose in life and self-confidence from it that my critics have as well, myself included. I'm ready to go back to work. I'm ready to put down roots in our new community. I'm ready to buy a house and build a nest. I'm ready to plant a garden, both literally and metaphorically. Instead, I'm just sort of rattling around inside this house -- not even outside mowing the ever-growing lawn with my newfound lawn mowing fu since the weather is yucky. ARGH.
Just... feeling restless this week, and wanting to feel useful instead.
I think I'll go clean the house.
Trace
On top of that, I hate to admit it, but I can't help but feel there's a little truth to the concept of Seasonal Affective Disorder. This sounds like the stupidest, most ridiculously made-up ailment I've ever heard of in my life! Yet I can't deny that when the weather it grey and rainy and blah as it has been here off and mostly on for the past week, I just feel worn down by it. The sun comes out, the weather turns warm, and it's like WALL-E charging his solar batteries for me! I perk right up! It's sunny and clear here today, but still chilly, windy like mad, no open windows. I miss sunny warmth and I'm ready for it to arrive.
Then, like so many people, I'm feeling worn down by the noise surrounding Healthcare Reform. I don't intend to talk about the actual issue here and now -- but gee whiz, I'm just tired of all the noise surrounding it, and so much of it mean and crazy. Noise noise noise! I've told Ian that I'm getting to the point where I don't even enjoy watching "The Daily Show" as much as I used to because political talk in general just brings out the worst in me, and raises my blood pressure (even if Jon Stewart keeps me laughing the whole time).
Mostly I'm just ready to move, ready to move on. I hesitate posting stuff like this because I always feel a little guilty. Through the past year, I've received so many reminders, some kind, some incredibly unkind, that many people would love to have the endless free time that I do. Noted. Many people would also like to have the sense of purpose in life and self-confidence from it that my critics have as well, myself included. I'm ready to go back to work. I'm ready to put down roots in our new community. I'm ready to buy a house and build a nest. I'm ready to plant a garden, both literally and metaphorically. Instead, I'm just sort of rattling around inside this house -- not even outside mowing the ever-growing lawn with my newfound lawn mowing fu since the weather is yucky. ARGH.
Just... feeling restless this week, and wanting to feel useful instead.
I think I'll go clean the house.
Trace