and tomorrow there will be 4
Tomorrow is my induction for our second baby. I wasn't as excited this time around, but apparently that's pretty normal. I also had a REALLY rough pregnancy, which was hard to handle after Lilian's super easy one. I was hoping not to go down the induction road again but it is what it is. I wish I did go naturally because tonight wouldn't have been so hard. I'm not good with change, almost ever. I've had 2 1/2 years with Lilian and we were like a little team. As or tomorrow, that particular team will be no more. It won't be worse, it may be better, but it will, at the very least, be different and that left me sobbing in the bathroom after we put her to bed. I won't see her again until we bring Cocky Bear (her name for the baby, not mine) home and I know she doesn't fully understand what's happening and that makes me so sad and anxious. I will love this baby as much as I love Lilian, I know that, but it's the change from what I had for the last two years that I'm mourning right now.