Everything is Numb3rs
Did this because I'm hitting my hardcore Numb3rs stage again and I'm bored/trying to stay awake/I want to. And so people have some knowledge of what I'm talking about when I fangirl over Numb3rs.
Summary from the official website.
NUMB3RS is a drama about an FBI agent who recruits his mathematical-genius brother to help the Bureau solve a wide range of challenging crimes in Los Angeles. The two brothers take on the most confounding criminal cases from a very distinctive perspective. Inspired by actual events, the series depicts how the confluence of police work and mathematics provides unexpected revelations and answers to the most perplexing criminal questions.
A dedicated FBI agent, Don Eppes (Rob Morrow), couldn't be more different from his younger brother, Charlie Eppes (David Krumholtz), a brilliant mathematician who, since he was little, yearned to impress his big brother. Don is joined on his team by fellow agents Megan Reeves (Diane Farr), a behavioral specialist who brings psychological insight to their investigations; David Sinclair (Alimi Ballard), who utilizes his incredible perspective and the survival skills he learned growing up in the Bronx; and new agent Colby Granger (Dylan Bruno) who just completed an extensive tour of duty in the U.S. Military.
After some initial reluctance, Don's team welcomes Charlie's innovative methods to crime-solving. Their father, Alan (Judd Hirsch), is happy to see his sons working together even though he doesn't understand the intricacies of what Charlie does for a living. It is his co-workers at CalSci who further refine Charlie's approach and help him stay focused. Physicist friend Dr. Larry Fleinhardt (Peter MacNicol) constantly challenges Charlie to employ a broader point of view to his work with the FBI, and Amita Ramanujan (Navi Rawat), Charlie's former grad student, frequently helps him see cases in a new light. Despite their disparate approaches to life, Don and Charlie are able to combine their areas of expertise and solve some killer cases.
Season 1 Cast (Left to right): Top Row: Professor Lawrence "Larry" Fleinhardt, Amita Ramanujan, and Agent David Sinclair. Bottom Row: Alan Eppes, Professor Charles "Charlie" Eppes, Special Agent Don Eppes, and Agent Terry Lake
Credited Season 2 & 3 Cast - sans Peter MacNichol/Larry Fleinhardt (Left to right): Alan Eppes, Agent Megan Reeves, Agent David Sinclair, Special Agent Don Eppes, Professor Charlie Eppes, Agent Colby Granger, and Professor Amita Ramanujan
Recurring character: Agent Ian Edgerton
Recurring Season 3 character: Dr. Mildred "Millie" Finch
“Charlie, you’re a mathematician, you’re always looking for the elegant solution. Human behavior is rarely, if ever, elegant.” -Professor Larry Fleinhardt
“Well, listen, Dad, whenever I have a girlfriend, I will let you know by putting a note on the refrigerator.” -Professor Charlie Eppes
Bob Mazelli: FBI? What’d we do wrong this time?
Agent Terry Lake: What did you do wrong last time?
Special Agent Don Eppes: Hey, what are you doing for dinner tonight? My dad's cooking for his friend, Jill.
Agent Terry Lake: What you mean… like a double date?
Don: No, no, I mean he'd be on a date. You'd just be doing me a favor. I mean... nothing to do with work.
Terry: Nice to see your social skills are as sharp as ever.
Don: Terry, I'm just trying to be upfront. I don't want there to be any weirdness, you know, given our history.
Terry: No weirdness, Don, just history.
Don: Is that a yes?
Terry: …Maybe.
Don: What if I let you bring your cuffs?
Terry: (Laughing) Well, in that case...
Don: Relax, I got a great apartment in a great neighborhood... you'll find one too.
Charlie: Then why are you over here all the time?
Professor Charlie Eppes: Okay, what's the biggest number you can think of?
Agent David Sinclair: A gazillion? Is that a real number?
Charlie: (Chuckles then suddenly stops) No.
Alan Eppes: You must have some kind of sixth sense. I buy rib-eye and you just materialize.
Special Agent Don Eppes: Well, actually, I… Did you say rib-eye? And like a baked potato?
Professor Larry Fleinhardt: Children are wormholes.
Professor Amita Ramanujan: Wormholes?
Larry: Yeah, they're portals into the unreachable future and unattainable past. No, as things stand now they exist only in the theoretical realm.
Amita: Well, I could see why you might have some trouble selling a woman on the idea of carrying your wormhole.
Charlie: Tell your aunt that statistically she's more likely to be mauled by a bear.
Larry: Actually, statistics favor the bear being mauled by my aunt.
“Here's where I get reductive on your ass.” -Larry
(Earlier Charlie misspelled the word "anomaly" which caused him to lose a chess game to Don and Alan)
Charlie: Yeah, don't worry. I'll take care of the old man while you're gone.
Don: Alright guys, see ya. (Don leaves)
Alan: Old man?!
Charlie: I use it strictly as a term of endearment, father.
Alan: Well, you better prepare yourself little boy because... this old man can kick your ass.
Charlie: Oh yeah? What are you gonna cheat again?
Alan: No, I'm gonna get the Scrabble board. (Alan gets up)
Charlie: …Cause, uh, Scrabble's missing a piece.
Larry: Charlie, have you ever considered our place in the universe?
Charlie: Certainly… every time we speak.
Alan: 3.5 is a ridiculous spread. I took the Jaguars and made $100.
Don: What, you have a bookie?
Alan: Do I need a lawyer?
Don: Ahh, I'll let ya slide.
(On the note he received) “It's from someone who says she's a fan of my work on low dimensional topology. And she's a fan of my… hair.” -Charlie [that is an actual reference to a group of fangirls who call themselves the "Slobbering David Krumholtz Groupies" who are obsessed with David's hair]
(To Charlie about there being no Nobel prize for math because Nobel’s wife cheated on him with a mathematician) “All you math guys are aced out because one of you was good in bed?” -Agent Megan Reeves
Charlie: Ah, you know what, it’s all right. Ever since they, uh, made the goalie paths smaller, my stats analysis has been thrown off anyway.
Don: You’re no fun, man. Hockey is, is, is more than stats.
Charlie: But stats are fun for, for me. (Hears photographers calling out) Why do they want pictures of us?
Don: Just… (Calls back) He’s a famous mathematician!
Charlie: Don’t do that.
Don: Hey, get your vogue on, Charlie.
Agent Colby Granger: (to David) Let's see if we can get the whiz kid in here to give us a hand.
Professor Charlie Eppes: (walking from behind and smiling) Whiz kid?
Don: So, does that make me a three-step thinker?
Charlie: You keep working with me you’ll get there soon enough.
Don: Shut up.
Colby: You assaulted a federal agent with a deadly weapon.
Suspect: It was a Volkswagen.
Don: So what does all your behavioral science training tell you about a grown man who still lives with his mother?
Megan: Probably about the same as two brothers still mooching meals at their dad’s house three nights a week.
Don: Hey, technically it’s my brother’s house, but o-okay, Megan, I-I see how it’s gonna be.
Megan: (grins) I just call ‘em like I see ‘em.
Don: Uh huh, all right.
Don: (catching paper airplane) Who made this?
Charlie: Me. Why?
Don: Wings are a little thin here buddy.
Charlie: Forgive me if all my years of advanced applied mathematics take issue with that assessment.
Don: Yeah… well… you'll forgive me if all my years of high school detention say I'm right. Go ahead… you make those wings wider… it'll fly.
Amita: Charlie, where did you learn all this stuff about assassination?
Charlie: If I told you that, I'd have to kill you.
Amita: Okay, seriously…
Charlie: Seriously.
Larry: A Fleinhardt? When did my name become a predicate adjective?
Charlie: When your students started using it that way.
“Emotions aren't rational, Granger. Revenge is just an emotion.” -Megan
(to Alan and Don sarcastically) “Isn't it nice having a living history of embarrassing moments from my childhood?” -Charlie
Marshall Penfield: You were always testy when challenged… Ya know; I was talking about that with Amita…
Professor Charlie Eppes: You were, were you? Marshall, do whatever you like… just you remember… Amita's a sharp mathematician so no matter how you try you're never gonna to get her to believe that this (holds up two fingers an inch apart) is six inches.
Marshall: (smirking) I bet with you that subject's never come up.
Colby: (to David) Ooh… math fight!
[Penfield is Charlie's biggest rival who's spent 5 years scrutinizing the "Eppes Convergence" which is Charlie's life's work]
“Curiosity. Not good for cats, great for scientists.” -Larry
“What's the deal? There are more people here in the middle of the night than at ten in the morning. It's like the FBI.” -Don
Special Agent Don Eppes: The Marshalls come to arrest him; he barricades himself inside the house. Four days later in the middle of a negotiation for no apparent reason he opens fire.
Agent Ian Edgerton: When did crazy stop being a reason?
Alan: (working crossword puzzle) Okay... 8-letter word for "egotistical."
Charlie: "Conceited".
Alan: "Conceited" is a 9-letter word.
Charlie: C-O-N-C-E-T-E-D.
Alan: (perturbed) Another person might think that our educational system has failed you completely, Charlie.
David: He was a white guy!
Don: Nah. it's more a geographic thing. Apparently, race isn't really a factor.
David: They need to circulate that memo.
Charlie: Hey I'm organized… enough!
Larry: There's a symmetry to my chaos. Okay. My system is chronologically by height.
Amita: Pretty poetic description of "clutter."
“There was another fire, and apparently a signed confession does not satisfy Professor Eppes' standard of guilt.” -Larry
(To Colby) “Why don't we try to only break one law a day?” -Megan
Charlie: You were unable to trace Ron Allen’s history because he was careful to conceal his past. What he couldn’t conceal, however, was the impact of his past.
Megan: I’m so hoping you have one of your cute little analogies for this.
Charlie: I think you need to loosen up, you know. Free your molecules and your ass will follow.
Larry: Oh yeah, well, sound advice.
David: Five bucks says he runs.
Colby: Yeah? Ten bucks says I catch him.
Megan: You knew her, didn't you?
(silence from Don)
Megan: It does say "behaviorist" on my job description.
Don: Yes, I knew her.
(to Colby in response to his question about teaching Krav Maga) “If you're gonna arrest people that are one hundred pounds heavier than you, you're gonna need to learn some hobbies!” -Megan
David: What's the first thing a New Yorker notices about L.A.?
Megan: No good pizza.
David: Okay, what's the second thing?
Charlie: We're gonna need the surveillance footage and some tripods, a laser pointer… and we're gonna need string.
Don: String?
Charlie: Lots of string.
Charlie: If you call me 'Chuck' one more time, I swear…
Don: Well, how about I call you 'Chuckie'?
Charlie: How about I call you 'Donald'?
Don: How about I call you 'Nerd'?
Colby: We're the only white people in here.
David: Yes… we are.
[David is black. Think about it.]
“The only thing a teacher ever gave me was detention.” -Colby
Alan: Larry, I'm going to give you the same advice I give to all the geniuses I know.
Larry: Which is?
Alan: Don't be an idiot.
“Don't underestimate how great it is to have somebody to come home to talk to.” -Don
David: You speak French?
Don: There was a girl, once upon a time.
“Never been in combat, but I've been in my share of fire fights and you know what scares the hell out of me? It's not dyin'; it's letting my guys down.” -Don
“Looking for patterns in a series of random events? Oh dear… Professor Eppes wouldn't approve.” -Colby
Megan: Get a name?
Colby: And an address. Plug that into your fancy little nav system in your Acura.
Megan: Oh, don't player hate.
Oswald Kittner: So I almost get shot and you guys respond by doing a lot of math.
Professor Charlie Eppes: That's how we roll at CalSci.
Amita: (regarding Mildred, who walked in on them making out and told them to pretend she wasn't there before she left) What is up with that woman?
Charlie: I don't know about you, but I- I can't just pretend that woman wasn't here. I just saw that woman.
(To Larry- about when he wanted to grow a mustache) “You said my hair follicles had not reached critical mass!” -Charlie
Megan: Autopsy results are in. Death from a gunshot wound to Minh's head.
Colby: We need an autopsy to tell us that?
Charlie: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Colby: No.
“David, apologize to the man for saving his life.” -Colby
“A = B = C = D. It's like one of Charlie's equations. Can't believe I just said that. ” -Colby
(When discussing why the FBI was involved with the dead diver)
Colby: Did the bullet hole in the wetsuit have anything to do with it?
Coroner: No, it's the bullet hole in the diver that really clinched it.
Colby: Glad to see those four years of medical school weren't wasted.
Colby: Unlocked door at the shady lawyer's apartment is never a good sign.
David: Guy needs to hire a maid service.
Colby: Guy needs to hire an arsonist. (pushes open bedroom door) David? (regarding the bullet wound in the back of Salazar's head) I'm no doctor, but I don't think this guy died in his sleep.
Dr. Millie Finch: Don't take this as a criticism…
Professor Charlie Eppes: Is it a criticism?
Millie: Yes.
Megan: So where's all the money go?
Amita: Most of the money stays in Mexico.
Charlie: Death Squad Retirement fund.
“In Antarctica we were used to doing everything very quietly. It’s like a big library… with penguins.” -Millie
Charlie: Since when did you become my conscience?
Amita: Around the same time we started making out.
Amita: Byzantines fighting side by side with Cowboys and Indians?
Charlie: I had an imaginative childhood.
Alan: Oh, by the way Charlie, when I hooked up all these lights I may have blown a circuit or two.
Charlie: A circuit or two?
Alan: Yeah, I hope you had the system backed up with that laptop of yours in the garage.
(Charlie frantically runs from the room to the garage)
Alan: (To empty room) I was just kidding.
David: The dude has always made me crazy. Ever know anyone like that?
Don: Well, you know Charlie, right?
(About Dr. Novich) "He skunked my office. I'm taking him down." -Charlie
Professor Stanley Novich: I've seen your game, Eppes. It won't make it at the big table.
Professor Charlie Eppes: My game has vastly improved.
Novich: Been practicing have you?
Charlie: I've been working on a specialized training program that should make me more than ready by tournament time.
Novich: Guess we'll just see.
Professor Amita Ramanujan: What is that? Geek trash talk?
Charlie: (showing his laptop monitor to David and Colby) Now, this is Professor Stanley Novich and this is where the door to his lab used to be.
David: What do you mean used to be?
Charlie: I had one of my Dad's contractor friends bring in a crew last night, they drywalled his doorway, they painted it to match the wall. (snickers)
Charlie: Can you help me out with some surveillance equipment?
Megan: (pauses) No.
Alan: Great! Now I have two jaded, world weary sons!
Don: And this one's got a shrink to prove it.
Charlie: You know you just broke the law with that little trick. The Law of Conservation of Angular Momentum.
Oswald: What, is Sir Isaac Newton gonna come and bust me?
Oswald: He shoots, he scores! Ohhh Oswald Kittner. Mercy rule?
Alan: This has gotta be a Canadian hockey table.
Oswald: Unless there's a self perpetuating element involved like, er, nanotechnology. Okay, you know when you stack up champagne glasses and fill them with champagne, you only pour the champagne into the top glass and then it overflows to the others. It requires resources applied in one location then it spreads.
Alan: Oh good god, another one?
Megan: And we need a witness who's willing to take them down.
Witness: I'm… I'm just so damn scared.
Megan: I know you are, but you're angry too.
Witness: They picked the wrong computer geek to mess with!
Charlie: Yeah, a specialized program for people like you.
Oswald: High school dropouts that are obsessed with fantasy baseball?
Charlie: Gifted people who lack traditional educations.
Oswald: That's a nice way of putting it!
(Oswald tells Charlie that he plans to apply to CalSci)
Don: You are right. That’s another one.
Alan: Well, we can always use one more.
Don: Are you kidding me? They’re taking over here.
Alan: You’re right.
Charlie: Hey, do me a favor. Go find Dr. Finch. Tell her we need a priority run on the super computer and you know, be convincing.
Oswald: I'll tell her the fate of democracy's at stake.
Charlie: I like that.
Don: Yeah, relax you got the fifth best shot in the country covering your ass.
Edgerton: Hey, fourth. You don't wanna ask how I moved up one spot.
(Charlie takes Ian's muffin and throws it to the ground for a demonstration) “You shouldn't come between a man and his fiber!” -Edgerton
Charlie: I can't believe it. Right in the middle of my lecture!
Alan: Charlie, I’m as embarrassed as you are.
Charlie: You were snoring!
David: Next time I don't answer my phone, do me a favor. Just call the cavalry, okay?
Colby: Yeah and what if you're having sex?
David: Point taken.
Agent Colby Granger: (sarcastically) Nice suit, Berelli.
AUSA Berelli: Nice face!
This picture of David and Colby needs a caption. Have at it! :D
[I’m feeling|
Fangirlish ]
[Current Addiction:| Get Mine, Get Yours ~ Christina Aguilera ]
Summary from the official website.
NUMB3RS is a drama about an FBI agent who recruits his mathematical-genius brother to help the Bureau solve a wide range of challenging crimes in Los Angeles. The two brothers take on the most confounding criminal cases from a very distinctive perspective. Inspired by actual events, the series depicts how the confluence of police work and mathematics provides unexpected revelations and answers to the most perplexing criminal questions.
A dedicated FBI agent, Don Eppes (Rob Morrow), couldn't be more different from his younger brother, Charlie Eppes (David Krumholtz), a brilliant mathematician who, since he was little, yearned to impress his big brother. Don is joined on his team by fellow agents Megan Reeves (Diane Farr), a behavioral specialist who brings psychological insight to their investigations; David Sinclair (Alimi Ballard), who utilizes his incredible perspective and the survival skills he learned growing up in the Bronx; and new agent Colby Granger (Dylan Bruno) who just completed an extensive tour of duty in the U.S. Military.
After some initial reluctance, Don's team welcomes Charlie's innovative methods to crime-solving. Their father, Alan (Judd Hirsch), is happy to see his sons working together even though he doesn't understand the intricacies of what Charlie does for a living. It is his co-workers at CalSci who further refine Charlie's approach and help him stay focused. Physicist friend Dr. Larry Fleinhardt (Peter MacNicol) constantly challenges Charlie to employ a broader point of view to his work with the FBI, and Amita Ramanujan (Navi Rawat), Charlie's former grad student, frequently helps him see cases in a new light. Despite their disparate approaches to life, Don and Charlie are able to combine their areas of expertise and solve some killer cases.
Season 1 Cast (Left to right): Top Row: Professor Lawrence "Larry" Fleinhardt, Amita Ramanujan, and Agent David Sinclair. Bottom Row: Alan Eppes, Professor Charles "Charlie" Eppes, Special Agent Don Eppes, and Agent Terry Lake
Credited Season 2 & 3 Cast - sans Peter MacNichol/Larry Fleinhardt (Left to right): Alan Eppes, Agent Megan Reeves, Agent David Sinclair, Special Agent Don Eppes, Professor Charlie Eppes, Agent Colby Granger, and Professor Amita Ramanujan
Recurring character: Agent Ian Edgerton
Recurring Season 3 character: Dr. Mildred "Millie" Finch
“Charlie, you’re a mathematician, you’re always looking for the elegant solution. Human behavior is rarely, if ever, elegant.” -Professor Larry Fleinhardt
“Well, listen, Dad, whenever I have a girlfriend, I will let you know by putting a note on the refrigerator.” -Professor Charlie Eppes
Bob Mazelli: FBI? What’d we do wrong this time?
Agent Terry Lake: What did you do wrong last time?
Special Agent Don Eppes: Hey, what are you doing for dinner tonight? My dad's cooking for his friend, Jill.
Agent Terry Lake: What you mean… like a double date?
Don: No, no, I mean he'd be on a date. You'd just be doing me a favor. I mean... nothing to do with work.
Terry: Nice to see your social skills are as sharp as ever.
Don: Terry, I'm just trying to be upfront. I don't want there to be any weirdness, you know, given our history.
Terry: No weirdness, Don, just history.
Don: Is that a yes?
Terry: …Maybe.
Don: What if I let you bring your cuffs?
Terry: (Laughing) Well, in that case...
Don: Relax, I got a great apartment in a great neighborhood... you'll find one too.
Charlie: Then why are you over here all the time?
Professor Charlie Eppes: Okay, what's the biggest number you can think of?
Agent David Sinclair: A gazillion? Is that a real number?
Charlie: (Chuckles then suddenly stops) No.
Alan Eppes: You must have some kind of sixth sense. I buy rib-eye and you just materialize.
Special Agent Don Eppes: Well, actually, I… Did you say rib-eye? And like a baked potato?
Professor Larry Fleinhardt: Children are wormholes.
Professor Amita Ramanujan: Wormholes?
Larry: Yeah, they're portals into the unreachable future and unattainable past. No, as things stand now they exist only in the theoretical realm.
Amita: Well, I could see why you might have some trouble selling a woman on the idea of carrying your wormhole.
Charlie: Tell your aunt that statistically she's more likely to be mauled by a bear.
Larry: Actually, statistics favor the bear being mauled by my aunt.
“Here's where I get reductive on your ass.” -Larry
(Earlier Charlie misspelled the word "anomaly" which caused him to lose a chess game to Don and Alan)
Charlie: Yeah, don't worry. I'll take care of the old man while you're gone.
Don: Alright guys, see ya. (Don leaves)
Alan: Old man?!
Charlie: I use it strictly as a term of endearment, father.
Alan: Well, you better prepare yourself little boy because... this old man can kick your ass.
Charlie: Oh yeah? What are you gonna cheat again?
Alan: No, I'm gonna get the Scrabble board. (Alan gets up)
Charlie: …Cause, uh, Scrabble's missing a piece.
Larry: Charlie, have you ever considered our place in the universe?
Charlie: Certainly… every time we speak.
Alan: 3.5 is a ridiculous spread. I took the Jaguars and made $100.
Don: What, you have a bookie?
Alan: Do I need a lawyer?
Don: Ahh, I'll let ya slide.
(On the note he received) “It's from someone who says she's a fan of my work on low dimensional topology. And she's a fan of my… hair.” -Charlie [that is an actual reference to a group of fangirls who call themselves the "Slobbering David Krumholtz Groupies" who are obsessed with David's hair]
(To Charlie about there being no Nobel prize for math because Nobel’s wife cheated on him with a mathematician) “All you math guys are aced out because one of you was good in bed?” -Agent Megan Reeves
Charlie: Ah, you know what, it’s all right. Ever since they, uh, made the goalie paths smaller, my stats analysis has been thrown off anyway.
Don: You’re no fun, man. Hockey is, is, is more than stats.
Charlie: But stats are fun for, for me. (Hears photographers calling out) Why do they want pictures of us?
Don: Just… (Calls back) He’s a famous mathematician!
Charlie: Don’t do that.
Don: Hey, get your vogue on, Charlie.
Agent Colby Granger: (to David) Let's see if we can get the whiz kid in here to give us a hand.
Professor Charlie Eppes: (walking from behind and smiling) Whiz kid?
Don: So, does that make me a three-step thinker?
Charlie: You keep working with me you’ll get there soon enough.
Don: Shut up.
Colby: You assaulted a federal agent with a deadly weapon.
Suspect: It was a Volkswagen.
Don: So what does all your behavioral science training tell you about a grown man who still lives with his mother?
Megan: Probably about the same as two brothers still mooching meals at their dad’s house three nights a week.
Don: Hey, technically it’s my brother’s house, but o-okay, Megan, I-I see how it’s gonna be.
Megan: (grins) I just call ‘em like I see ‘em.
Don: Uh huh, all right.
Don: (catching paper airplane) Who made this?
Charlie: Me. Why?
Don: Wings are a little thin here buddy.
Charlie: Forgive me if all my years of advanced applied mathematics take issue with that assessment.
Don: Yeah… well… you'll forgive me if all my years of high school detention say I'm right. Go ahead… you make those wings wider… it'll fly.
Amita: Charlie, where did you learn all this stuff about assassination?
Charlie: If I told you that, I'd have to kill you.
Amita: Okay, seriously…
Charlie: Seriously.
Larry: A Fleinhardt? When did my name become a predicate adjective?
Charlie: When your students started using it that way.
“Emotions aren't rational, Granger. Revenge is just an emotion.” -Megan
(to Alan and Don sarcastically) “Isn't it nice having a living history of embarrassing moments from my childhood?” -Charlie
Marshall Penfield: You were always testy when challenged… Ya know; I was talking about that with Amita…
Professor Charlie Eppes: You were, were you? Marshall, do whatever you like… just you remember… Amita's a sharp mathematician so no matter how you try you're never gonna to get her to believe that this (holds up two fingers an inch apart) is six inches.
Marshall: (smirking) I bet with you that subject's never come up.
Colby: (to David) Ooh… math fight!
[Penfield is Charlie's biggest rival who's spent 5 years scrutinizing the "Eppes Convergence" which is Charlie's life's work]
“Curiosity. Not good for cats, great for scientists.” -Larry
“What's the deal? There are more people here in the middle of the night than at ten in the morning. It's like the FBI.” -Don
Special Agent Don Eppes: The Marshalls come to arrest him; he barricades himself inside the house. Four days later in the middle of a negotiation for no apparent reason he opens fire.
Agent Ian Edgerton: When did crazy stop being a reason?
Alan: (working crossword puzzle) Okay... 8-letter word for "egotistical."
Charlie: "Conceited".
Alan: "Conceited" is a 9-letter word.
Charlie: C-O-N-C-E-T-E-D.
Alan: (perturbed) Another person might think that our educational system has failed you completely, Charlie.
David: He was a white guy!
Don: Nah. it's more a geographic thing. Apparently, race isn't really a factor.
David: They need to circulate that memo.
Charlie: Hey I'm organized… enough!
Larry: There's a symmetry to my chaos. Okay. My system is chronologically by height.
Amita: Pretty poetic description of "clutter."
“There was another fire, and apparently a signed confession does not satisfy Professor Eppes' standard of guilt.” -Larry
(To Colby) “Why don't we try to only break one law a day?” -Megan
Charlie: You were unable to trace Ron Allen’s history because he was careful to conceal his past. What he couldn’t conceal, however, was the impact of his past.
Megan: I’m so hoping you have one of your cute little analogies for this.
Charlie: I think you need to loosen up, you know. Free your molecules and your ass will follow.
Larry: Oh yeah, well, sound advice.
David: Five bucks says he runs.
Colby: Yeah? Ten bucks says I catch him.
Megan: You knew her, didn't you?
(silence from Don)
Megan: It does say "behaviorist" on my job description.
Don: Yes, I knew her.
(to Colby in response to his question about teaching Krav Maga) “If you're gonna arrest people that are one hundred pounds heavier than you, you're gonna need to learn some hobbies!” -Megan
David: What's the first thing a New Yorker notices about L.A.?
Megan: No good pizza.
David: Okay, what's the second thing?
Charlie: We're gonna need the surveillance footage and some tripods, a laser pointer… and we're gonna need string.
Don: String?
Charlie: Lots of string.
Charlie: If you call me 'Chuck' one more time, I swear…
Don: Well, how about I call you 'Chuckie'?
Charlie: How about I call you 'Donald'?
Don: How about I call you 'Nerd'?
Colby: We're the only white people in here.
David: Yes… we are.
[David is black. Think about it.]
“The only thing a teacher ever gave me was detention.” -Colby
Alan: Larry, I'm going to give you the same advice I give to all the geniuses I know.
Larry: Which is?
Alan: Don't be an idiot.
“Don't underestimate how great it is to have somebody to come home to talk to.” -Don
David: You speak French?
Don: There was a girl, once upon a time.
“Never been in combat, but I've been in my share of fire fights and you know what scares the hell out of me? It's not dyin'; it's letting my guys down.” -Don
“Looking for patterns in a series of random events? Oh dear… Professor Eppes wouldn't approve.” -Colby
Megan: Get a name?
Colby: And an address. Plug that into your fancy little nav system in your Acura.
Megan: Oh, don't player hate.
Oswald Kittner: So I almost get shot and you guys respond by doing a lot of math.
Professor Charlie Eppes: That's how we roll at CalSci.
Amita: (regarding Mildred, who walked in on them making out and told them to pretend she wasn't there before she left) What is up with that woman?
Charlie: I don't know about you, but I- I can't just pretend that woman wasn't here. I just saw that woman.
(To Larry- about when he wanted to grow a mustache) “You said my hair follicles had not reached critical mass!” -Charlie
Megan: Autopsy results are in. Death from a gunshot wound to Minh's head.
Colby: We need an autopsy to tell us that?
Charlie: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Colby: No.
“David, apologize to the man for saving his life.” -Colby
“A = B = C = D. It's like one of Charlie's equations. Can't believe I just said that. ” -Colby
(When discussing why the FBI was involved with the dead diver)
Colby: Did the bullet hole in the wetsuit have anything to do with it?
Coroner: No, it's the bullet hole in the diver that really clinched it.
Colby: Glad to see those four years of medical school weren't wasted.
Colby: Unlocked door at the shady lawyer's apartment is never a good sign.
David: Guy needs to hire a maid service.
Colby: Guy needs to hire an arsonist. (pushes open bedroom door) David? (regarding the bullet wound in the back of Salazar's head) I'm no doctor, but I don't think this guy died in his sleep.
Dr. Millie Finch: Don't take this as a criticism…
Professor Charlie Eppes: Is it a criticism?
Millie: Yes.
Megan: So where's all the money go?
Amita: Most of the money stays in Mexico.
Charlie: Death Squad Retirement fund.
“In Antarctica we were used to doing everything very quietly. It’s like a big library… with penguins.” -Millie
Charlie: Since when did you become my conscience?
Amita: Around the same time we started making out.
Amita: Byzantines fighting side by side with Cowboys and Indians?
Charlie: I had an imaginative childhood.
Alan: Oh, by the way Charlie, when I hooked up all these lights I may have blown a circuit or two.
Charlie: A circuit or two?
Alan: Yeah, I hope you had the system backed up with that laptop of yours in the garage.
(Charlie frantically runs from the room to the garage)
Alan: (To empty room) I was just kidding.
David: The dude has always made me crazy. Ever know anyone like that?
Don: Well, you know Charlie, right?
(About Dr. Novich) "He skunked my office. I'm taking him down." -Charlie
Professor Stanley Novich: I've seen your game, Eppes. It won't make it at the big table.
Professor Charlie Eppes: My game has vastly improved.
Novich: Been practicing have you?
Charlie: I've been working on a specialized training program that should make me more than ready by tournament time.
Novich: Guess we'll just see.
Professor Amita Ramanujan: What is that? Geek trash talk?
Charlie: (showing his laptop monitor to David and Colby) Now, this is Professor Stanley Novich and this is where the door to his lab used to be.
David: What do you mean used to be?
Charlie: I had one of my Dad's contractor friends bring in a crew last night, they drywalled his doorway, they painted it to match the wall. (snickers)
Charlie: Can you help me out with some surveillance equipment?
Megan: (pauses) No.
Alan: Great! Now I have two jaded, world weary sons!
Don: And this one's got a shrink to prove it.
Charlie: You know you just broke the law with that little trick. The Law of Conservation of Angular Momentum.
Oswald: What, is Sir Isaac Newton gonna come and bust me?
Oswald: He shoots, he scores! Ohhh Oswald Kittner. Mercy rule?
Alan: This has gotta be a Canadian hockey table.
Oswald: Unless there's a self perpetuating element involved like, er, nanotechnology. Okay, you know when you stack up champagne glasses and fill them with champagne, you only pour the champagne into the top glass and then it overflows to the others. It requires resources applied in one location then it spreads.
Alan: Oh good god, another one?
Megan: And we need a witness who's willing to take them down.
Witness: I'm… I'm just so damn scared.
Megan: I know you are, but you're angry too.
Witness: They picked the wrong computer geek to mess with!
Charlie: Yeah, a specialized program for people like you.
Oswald: High school dropouts that are obsessed with fantasy baseball?
Charlie: Gifted people who lack traditional educations.
Oswald: That's a nice way of putting it!
(Oswald tells Charlie that he plans to apply to CalSci)
Don: You are right. That’s another one.
Alan: Well, we can always use one more.
Don: Are you kidding me? They’re taking over here.
Alan: You’re right.
Charlie: Hey, do me a favor. Go find Dr. Finch. Tell her we need a priority run on the super computer and you know, be convincing.
Oswald: I'll tell her the fate of democracy's at stake.
Charlie: I like that.
Don: Yeah, relax you got the fifth best shot in the country covering your ass.
Edgerton: Hey, fourth. You don't wanna ask how I moved up one spot.
(Charlie takes Ian's muffin and throws it to the ground for a demonstration) “You shouldn't come between a man and his fiber!” -Edgerton
Charlie: I can't believe it. Right in the middle of my lecture!
Alan: Charlie, I’m as embarrassed as you are.
Charlie: You were snoring!
David: Next time I don't answer my phone, do me a favor. Just call the cavalry, okay?
Colby: Yeah and what if you're having sex?
David: Point taken.
Agent Colby Granger: (sarcastically) Nice suit, Berelli.
AUSA Berelli: Nice face!
This picture of David and Colby needs a caption. Have at it! :D
[I’m feeling|
Fangirlish ]
[Current Addiction:| Get Mine, Get Yours ~ Christina Aguilera ]