Query
I have a serious question I'd like to ask all of you, if you'll humor me.
I need to know how others deal with, or even if they feel the horrific anxiety that comes with making decisions. Am I the only one who feels this way? Or do others just seem to manage it better?
For me it's like a soft nagging at first but then there's screaming in my head, telling me all the things that could go wrong and all the things I haven't thought of yet. It literally drives me to such severe panic attacks that I avoid doing anything out of routine. Take yesterday for example. I decided to forego college and take up aviation as a career. I was fine at first but now I'm screaming at myself in my head, going over every single possible thing that could go wrong during every step of the process and even worse contemplating what opportunities I lost by choosing that path. Maybe I would've been happier if I had done one or the other? I don't know and that just kills me. I cannot handle the uncertainty. I'm literally shaking at the thought of making such a life shattering decision without considering each and every possible outcome first. I may look normal but there's a screaming in my head that I can't stop until I decide to do nothing or I'm sure of my choice(which is almost never).
This happens even with small decisions too, like how to spend my free time after work. No matter what I do I will always spend the next day or two regretting and thinking of what I could've done instead and how it might've been better. I have no idea how to control this fear of decisions but its horrible and I want it to stop. I can't take it any more.
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