(no subject)
My mom, a saint, said to me a few months ago "the older I get, the more everyone looks beautiful to me."
I wonder if thats the key to happiness and understanding in this world. Maybe its all about just love and seeing everyone as beautiful. Half the things we feel for people we never show-somehow that statistic disappointed me.
For the longest time, my whole life practically, I've always felt that something was missing. But now I just keep feeling more and more every day that those voids are filling. I haven't been this happy since freshman year I think, as odd as that sounds. I've never felt so close to my friends, and so deeply in love with life. I'm far away from that darker side of me and because of that I can breathe. I can breathe without thinking that it will be back again soon. I feel so overwhelmed sometimes by things that I don't take it slow. I think when I'm alone about how much I miss Alex and how I wish he was here with me all of the time. But I hardly show it to him, or maybe not to the extent that I feel it. Half the things we feel for people we never show and if thats the case I have a lot of catching up to do. There's so much good to come that time moves so slowly, its ALWAYS so slow its agonizing. There's always somewhere I want to be, someplace with him, some place enriched with the love and beauty of people. Aren't we all looking for some sort of utopia? We make the mistake of overlooking where it lies, because its right in front of us- the world in its rawest form. We just have to make of it what we can.
I wonder if thats the key to happiness and understanding in this world. Maybe its all about just love and seeing everyone as beautiful. Half the things we feel for people we never show-somehow that statistic disappointed me.
For the longest time, my whole life practically, I've always felt that something was missing. But now I just keep feeling more and more every day that those voids are filling. I haven't been this happy since freshman year I think, as odd as that sounds. I've never felt so close to my friends, and so deeply in love with life. I'm far away from that darker side of me and because of that I can breathe. I can breathe without thinking that it will be back again soon. I feel so overwhelmed sometimes by things that I don't take it slow. I think when I'm alone about how much I miss Alex and how I wish he was here with me all of the time. But I hardly show it to him, or maybe not to the extent that I feel it. Half the things we feel for people we never show and if thats the case I have a lot of catching up to do. There's so much good to come that time moves so slowly, its ALWAYS so slow its agonizing. There's always somewhere I want to be, someplace with him, some place enriched with the love and beauty of people. Aren't we all looking for some sort of utopia? We make the mistake of overlooking where it lies, because its right in front of us- the world in its rawest form. We just have to make of it what we can.