Tumbling
I feel more that I'm tumbling into my future more than rocketing into it. It's to be expected... these latest changes have been ones that I've been terrified of making, and then it was as if some one came up from behind me and PUSHED.
I've noticed that I'm sleeping a lot more, as if to try and sleep through this change, but that won't happen.
My relationship is becoming serious. My career is starting to move. This year I'm losing all vestiges of the teen I've been for the last nine years, and I'm becoming a true adult.
It's frightening. Enthralling. Exciting. I want it, but I'm scared.
It's forcing me to deal with things from my past that I had buried deeply. The wounds that were slowly healing and then "torn fresh" are now healing properly, instead of festering and becoming worse. I realize that things were different then, and the choices I made were in reaction to my situation around me. I would probably do differently now, if only because I've learned from my mistakes then. And truly, that's all I could hope for. Learn, and move on. No need to dwell on it.
I'm not sure if I'm saying anything of any real point... it's all been said before.
The upshot? I have groceries. And beer.
I think I'm going to fix myself a pizza and enjoy an Amstel with it.
My life is pretty damn good; I'm just not quite used to it yet.
I've noticed that I'm sleeping a lot more, as if to try and sleep through this change, but that won't happen.
My relationship is becoming serious. My career is starting to move. This year I'm losing all vestiges of the teen I've been for the last nine years, and I'm becoming a true adult.
It's frightening. Enthralling. Exciting. I want it, but I'm scared.
It's forcing me to deal with things from my past that I had buried deeply. The wounds that were slowly healing and then "torn fresh" are now healing properly, instead of festering and becoming worse. I realize that things were different then, and the choices I made were in reaction to my situation around me. I would probably do differently now, if only because I've learned from my mistakes then. And truly, that's all I could hope for. Learn, and move on. No need to dwell on it.
I'm not sure if I'm saying anything of any real point... it's all been said before.
The upshot? I have groceries. And beer.
I think I'm going to fix myself a pizza and enjoy an Amstel with it.
My life is pretty damn good; I'm just not quite used to it yet.