(no subject)
Still don't know what is going on.
I talked to Kathy today (she called, finally) and she tells me that my mother is saying that I'm going to NYC with the boys for two weeks. I didn't know this, but HEY, who am I to complain right? I'M THE PERSON WITH THE FUCKING PLANS THAT JUST GOT CANCELLED BECAUSE OF THIS BULLSHIT. That's who I am. kthxbye.
Today left me feeling like no one cared. Like no one gives a damn about me, even though I know that they do. I guess it's the drama queen in me talking. I dunno, John wasn't really talking to me tonight, Angelo wasn't either, and Danitra came online and didn't even IM me. Cathy is away on vacation with her honey, Chris and I never speak unless I IM him to rant and rave about bullshit... I feel friendless though I know that I have friends and family. And this being single thing has left me feeling like I'm somehow screwed up and don't deserve to be in a relationship. It's a horrible feeling, but then I think about the relationships I've been in before and I'm just like....yeah. I don't deserve to be in a relationship right now because I do indeed suck at going out with NICE guys. I tend to go out with assholes.
What I need is to get away, which is why I'm trying really, really hard to hold onto this Spring Break trip to Orlando. Even if it's just me and John, at least I'll have fun and maybe get into some trouble. What happens in Orlando stays in Orlando. I think it would be really cool to be able to just... do what I want because no one I know will find out about it, unless I go really crazy and end up arrested or on the news. Which I wouldn't doubt! Hehe.
Moving to Montana might be out of the question. Too far, and U-Hauls are expensive man. You gotta pay by the muthaf-ing mile. Fuck that. I'll find somewhere close by, warm, and crawling with jobs. I need to get a job already, this is killing me.
Inactivity kills.
I love DSL. <3 @ music downloads. <3 @ Limewire. <3 @ lack of a life <3 @ Trillian.
I talked to Kathy today (she called, finally) and she tells me that my mother is saying that I'm going to NYC with the boys for two weeks. I didn't know this, but HEY, who am I to complain right? I'M THE PERSON WITH THE FUCKING PLANS THAT JUST GOT CANCELLED BECAUSE OF THIS BULLSHIT. That's who I am. kthxbye.
Today left me feeling like no one cared. Like no one gives a damn about me, even though I know that they do. I guess it's the drama queen in me talking. I dunno, John wasn't really talking to me tonight, Angelo wasn't either, and Danitra came online and didn't even IM me. Cathy is away on vacation with her honey, Chris and I never speak unless I IM him to rant and rave about bullshit... I feel friendless though I know that I have friends and family. And this being single thing has left me feeling like I'm somehow screwed up and don't deserve to be in a relationship. It's a horrible feeling, but then I think about the relationships I've been in before and I'm just like....yeah. I don't deserve to be in a relationship right now because I do indeed suck at going out with NICE guys. I tend to go out with assholes.
What I need is to get away, which is why I'm trying really, really hard to hold onto this Spring Break trip to Orlando. Even if it's just me and John, at least I'll have fun and maybe get into some trouble. What happens in Orlando stays in Orlando. I think it would be really cool to be able to just... do what I want because no one I know will find out about it, unless I go really crazy and end up arrested or on the news. Which I wouldn't doubt! Hehe.
Moving to Montana might be out of the question. Too far, and U-Hauls are expensive man. You gotta pay by the muthaf-ing mile. Fuck that. I'll find somewhere close by, warm, and crawling with jobs. I need to get a job already, this is killing me.
Inactivity kills.
I love DSL. <3 @ music downloads. <3 @ Limewire. <3 @ lack of a life <3 @ Trillian.