(no subject)
I just ate the weirdest muffin in the history of time. I was feeling a little peckish, so mom headed down to Perkins, which is about 5 seconds from my house. She called to tell me the muffin selections because I swear, they must have 300 kinds of muffins there. It's like a muffin emporium. But anyway, I decide on a "Berries N' Creme" muffin. I thought it sounded exciting. I wondered what might constitute the "creme" of the muffin, some frosting perhaps, or an extra creamy batter. But no, nothing as mundane as frosting had entered my muffin. I receive my long awaited breakfast pastry while playing Zelda, and take a big old bite without even looking down from my game. I threw the controller down in a frenzy and yelled, "OH MY GOD THIS MUFFIN IS FILLED WITH CUSTARD!" That's right, custard. The ensuing confusion was so complete I even managed to kill Link while trying to figure out the construction of my muffin. Who fills muffins with custard? Aliens, that's who. Alien are obviously trying to take over the world by filling innocent little muffins with mind-controlling custard and selling them to hapless passers-by. I need a brain scan to check for parasitic cranial leeches.We should alert the authorities immediately. Actually, why don't you, because I feel a sudden craving for human flesh.