creative writing
Got my first critiques today. By far the most popular bit in the whole story was this:
"I found her in the bathroom, red curls pulled back into a ponytail as she glared critically at an eyebrow in the mirror. I watched for a moment as she examined herself under the bright bathroom lights. She was probably looking for more of the faults that I somehow never managed to see. 'Hi,' she muttered as she made a face at herself."
Practically every reviewer underlined that passage and made nice comments about it.
Next week I'll find out what the professor thought. I bet anything she's going to tell me it needs another page of expanded details.
"I found her in the bathroom, red curls pulled back into a ponytail as she glared critically at an eyebrow in the mirror. I watched for a moment as she examined herself under the bright bathroom lights. She was probably looking for more of the faults that I somehow never managed to see. 'Hi,' she muttered as she made a face at herself."
Practically every reviewer underlined that passage and made nice comments about it.
Next week I'll find out what the professor thought. I bet anything she's going to tell me it needs another page of expanded details.