Old POSTED@!!!@!

Oct 01, 2004 18:16

Ran across this entry in an old post of mine, figured I'd share it again with everyone...

In case you haven't seen these before, Christopher Walken, some comedian will occasionally go on WAAF with a Penthouse Forum letter and replaces all the dirty words with something of the chosen topic, so I decided to do this, but replace all the words with terms referring to Magic. So here it is, let me know what you think....

By: Bill O'Donnell

I never thought this would happen to me,
I was playing at a card shop one day,
and someone tapped me on the shoulder to ask me a question,
when I turned around I couldn't believe my eyes,
it was a woman, she was beautiful with the biggest pair of (bouncing beebles) I'd ever seen,
the minute I saw her my little (ardent militia) instantly became an (army of allah)
I should mention now that I'm hung like a (big furry monster)
in fact i've got a quite a (boa constrictor)
i thought I was gonna have to go home and (browbeat)
but she said she had never done it before and she wanted me to (battering ram) her (castle)
we went in the backroom and she immediately unzipped my pants,
she must've been impressed because she let out a (battle cry)
then she began to play with my (bull elephant) and fondle my little (caltrops)
she was giving me my best (stalking bloodsucker) I'd ever had,
she bagan to (choke) because my (acidic dagger) was hitting the back of her (cabal pit)
so I zipped off her top and began to play with her (chaos orbs)
then I began to (lich) her (air bladder)
I still was hoping she wouldn't (rushing river)
I couldn't wait I had to (probe) her
but I didn't want to put on a (cloak of mists)
still she insisted, so i put my (beast of burden) in an (aether barrier)
i could feel my (angry mob) bouncing off her (abandoned outpost)
she began to moan that she wanted my (chaos goo) and I let out (gerrard's battle cry)
i bent her over to check out her (academy rector)
but it looked like a (bubbling muck) so I put my (bone flute) back into her (abyss)
my (bloated toad) was really buried in her (banshee)
I couldn't hold back, she asked me, aren't you going to (juzam)
finally i shot my (balm of restoration) all over her (dense foliage)
after that she wanted to keep doing it but i said sorry honey (i'm all tapped out)

Let me know, thanks... =)
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