I have decided I love eiffel 65
wow I just don't update anymore. I blame myspace! MYSPACE RUINED MY LIFE lol
well, I don't have that job anymore. the company traveled to Trumball and due to the fact that I have no transportation...I got the kick. its okay tho. no worries tho it sucks that all I do is spend all of my time on my lazy ass on the computer. these days I feel like I'm not doing any of the things I love to do. for instance, I always have a camera with me right? well I barely take pics n I always put them on my computer now that my mom gave me her digital and I don't put any pics in my photo album anymore. might also be the fact that I dunno how to print the pics cuz its not working the way I want it lol. I'm lazy...I don't do a god damn thing. I barely see the outside world anymore n I hate it. makes me feel like I have no future.
Until yesterday when I found out I can have a future. I had a meeting with SOme counselor at the BRS (bureau of rehabilitation services) These ppl help ppl with disabilities of any sort with pretty much anything they need. this guy told me that they can help me get a job quicker, they r gunna help me go back to Physical Therapy so I can walk better (which my family's ecstatic about)....they r gunna put me in Driver's ed and the state will pay for it!! then they will help me with what I need to get my license n a car. u kno what this means?? DAWN HAS A FUTURE!!!! fucking sweet isn't it?
here's something that bothered me a little....the guy asked me basically my whole life story right? well the subject of my birthmark was brought up and he goes "well the world is very predjudiced and theres no doubt about it. ppl base on looks n things and don't c the beauty on the inside. I'm not trying to sound mean Dawn, but ppl won't hire u cuz u limp mostly"(which I agree with). he said if I wanted, he would help me find a doctor or someone that would do a surgery to get rid of my birthmark. y did I get so sad?? I mean the guy wasn't saying I have to or thats what he thinks I should do he's saying whatever I want I can get mostly lol. but does everyone really judge me cuz of my face??? I have always said "if ppl don't like how I look then they don't have to look at me" and I planned on sticking by that til I died....now I'm secondguessing it n I'm hating myself for second guessing it. I dunno what to do. but it made me so sad for the rest of the day yesterday. Kathleen says "u need to do what makes u feel good bout myself...I think u want it, but ur afraid to say it" Am I?? I dunno....maybe...but if I do do something like this, I would be changing myself. I dunno its complicated.
well, I don't have that job anymore. the company traveled to Trumball and due to the fact that I have no transportation...I got the kick. its okay tho. no worries tho it sucks that all I do is spend all of my time on my lazy ass on the computer. these days I feel like I'm not doing any of the things I love to do. for instance, I always have a camera with me right? well I barely take pics n I always put them on my computer now that my mom gave me her digital and I don't put any pics in my photo album anymore. might also be the fact that I dunno how to print the pics cuz its not working the way I want it lol. I'm lazy...I don't do a god damn thing. I barely see the outside world anymore n I hate it. makes me feel like I have no future.
Until yesterday when I found out I can have a future. I had a meeting with SOme counselor at the BRS (bureau of rehabilitation services) These ppl help ppl with disabilities of any sort with pretty much anything they need. this guy told me that they can help me get a job quicker, they r gunna help me go back to Physical Therapy so I can walk better (which my family's ecstatic about)....they r gunna put me in Driver's ed and the state will pay for it!! then they will help me with what I need to get my license n a car. u kno what this means?? DAWN HAS A FUTURE!!!! fucking sweet isn't it?
here's something that bothered me a little....the guy asked me basically my whole life story right? well the subject of my birthmark was brought up and he goes "well the world is very predjudiced and theres no doubt about it. ppl base on looks n things and don't c the beauty on the inside. I'm not trying to sound mean Dawn, but ppl won't hire u cuz u limp mostly"(which I agree with). he said if I wanted, he would help me find a doctor or someone that would do a surgery to get rid of my birthmark. y did I get so sad?? I mean the guy wasn't saying I have to or thats what he thinks I should do he's saying whatever I want I can get mostly lol. but does everyone really judge me cuz of my face??? I have always said "if ppl don't like how I look then they don't have to look at me" and I planned on sticking by that til I died....now I'm secondguessing it n I'm hating myself for second guessing it. I dunno what to do. but it made me so sad for the rest of the day yesterday. Kathleen says "u need to do what makes u feel good bout myself...I think u want it, but ur afraid to say it" Am I?? I dunno....maybe...but if I do do something like this, I would be changing myself. I dunno its complicated.