musings on paper

[topazemrys]

If rage is what you want
then I can give it to you
Not quite as articulate, perhaps, as your ideal--
talented, crazy, caged animal pianist--
But is that really what you want, or just a fantasy?
Sometimes I wonder
about things I haven't done...
Is this it? Are we ready?
Am I ready to accept your duplicity? Your hypocrisy?
My jealosy...?

Do I care too much...? Can you feel it?
Sometimes I wonder.
I hear it from your lips;
deliberate... but perhaps unthinking.
Your earnest face shows a controlled emotion
You say it so often, I wonder if you really understand...
Perhaps it's force of habit
or you might feel responsible for me
after almost three years
What is it to you? An investment?
(like my long hair)

Help me
Hold me
And I will believe
I will have faith that it is not a lie
Maybe I need you after all...