(no subject)
SOOOOO much has happened since I last posted......
*I got sick....again. =/
*My grandmother passed away.
*I missed three days (in a row) at school.
*I had a nervous breakdown (and I'm not joking).
Well, first of all, I'm feeling better. I swear there's some magic in my mother's chicken noodle soup...Hermione must be coming to my house when I don't know it and dashing some extra magic in it to make me feel better. =) But then I found out my grandmother passed away (my parents called me out of school). I tried to take care of my mother and not have a panic attack because I was missing so much school and tried to take care of my uncle and one of my sisters, but in all of that, I forgot to grieve myself. I'm one of those people though; it takes a long time for death to "sink in". It hit me hard a few days after, and I went home and cried myself to sleep, but I still don't think it's totally sunk into me yet. I still am waiting for her to call or to show up at one of my violin performances. I guess I just always expected her to be there. But I'm feeling a little better about all of it. At least she didn't have to suffer. Oh, so yes, I forgot I mentioned having a nervous breakdown. Well, I was supposed to be able to get my homework from the days I missed, so that I could work on it over our three-day weekend, but when my friend went to get it from the school office (I was six hours away at my grandmother's old house) there was nothing to pick up. Apparently my teachers just "decided" not to send over my homework or didn't care or something. Personally, I think they never even got the memo and the office should be held responsible. (growls) So, when my friend called me, and I found out that little bit of info, I went into one of my grandmother's rooms and waved my arms in the air, gulping for breath, after a little bit, my parents found me, and I saw them come in, and I started mumbling saying god know what about homework and I don't know what I'm supposed to do and this is insane....in a sense I was hypervenalating (sp?) in a sort of nervous breakdown sort of way. I don't really remember what they did to calm me down, but I'm here today and not in a mental hospital, so it worked. =) So, ya, we had her funeral, and I walked back into school with my "determined, don't even think about getting in my way, I'm going to beat the hell out of anyone that even THINKS I'm going to fail my classes this semester" look on my face. I stayed after with my teachers and went in at the crack of dawn every day this past week, and guess what?! I'm TOTALLY caught up on all of my work INCLUDING TRIG.! =D If you read all of this, I truely know that you care (or that you are completely insane). lol But I just had to get it all out sometime....
"Never be afraid to LIVE."
*In memory of Grandmother*