My mother and the everlasting smile.
When I was young me and my mother were pretty close. I don't think I ever really stopped to wonder about whether it was nice to be close to her, whether it felt nice. I know I regretted it sometimes because...we spent so much time together and she was so over protective...it's like she got really jealous if I spent lots of time with friends.
I remember once I apologized for having a friend sleep over because at the end of the night my mother came up to me and said "You've been ignoring me all day y'know."
I wasn't ignoring her. I was playing with my friend.
It's like she needs to be the center of attention, more then that, it's like she needs to be loved the most.
I always hated her though, when she would have her boyfriend over and she'd suddenly be ignoring me, it was like I wasn't there and if I called her on it she'd be completely oblivious.
Maybe she wasn't ignoring me. Maybe she was just playing with her boyfriend.
We're not as close now though, we hardly spend time together and when we do we argue. I'll always wish there'd been more then just the two of us, I wish there was a brother or a father to keep things from getting so tense the way they do when there's just the two.
I don't know, I'm torn between wanting to be close with her again because I feel dependent on her as my mummy, and wanting to drift as far as possible from her because...erm, I don't really know why.
~~~~~~~
The District Manager visited the store today. That makes everyone tense but I figured I was doing fine. I'm an ok worker I think. I'm always polite to customers, I do whatever job anyone asks me.
More then that I get up at 6:30am to be there and work the morning shift after about 1 hour of sleep.
But I don't smile enough, I don't constantly have a grin on my face.
Jesus. I can't believe it's such a big problem, unfortunately Starbucks seems to think that if you're not grinning your ass off you're being rude. It just doesn't come naturally to me to smile so much. I tend to have a neutral sort of face, but apparently it's classified as "sullen" to other people, it's not intended that way though.
I'm never rude, I talk to customers, ask them things, smile when it's called for. Do I carry on a whole conversation like Miss America would? No.
I got talked to for it though. The District Manager told my Manager that "That girl over there needs to smile more. She looks like she doesn’t want to be here and y'know that's not good customer service."
My manager spent the rest of the day reminding me of this every five minutes.
"Smile!"
"Angelique *grins* remember your happy face."
"Hey, there's a customer, remember big, big smile."
I don't think I've ever had to be so falsely happy before. And I don't think I've ever looked so falsely happy either.
Curses on Starbucks, they stress me out, I'm quitting and getting a nice job at a library.
I remember once I apologized for having a friend sleep over because at the end of the night my mother came up to me and said "You've been ignoring me all day y'know."
I wasn't ignoring her. I was playing with my friend.
It's like she needs to be the center of attention, more then that, it's like she needs to be loved the most.
I always hated her though, when she would have her boyfriend over and she'd suddenly be ignoring me, it was like I wasn't there and if I called her on it she'd be completely oblivious.
Maybe she wasn't ignoring me. Maybe she was just playing with her boyfriend.
We're not as close now though, we hardly spend time together and when we do we argue. I'll always wish there'd been more then just the two of us, I wish there was a brother or a father to keep things from getting so tense the way they do when there's just the two.
I don't know, I'm torn between wanting to be close with her again because I feel dependent on her as my mummy, and wanting to drift as far as possible from her because...erm, I don't really know why.
~~~~~~~
The District Manager visited the store today. That makes everyone tense but I figured I was doing fine. I'm an ok worker I think. I'm always polite to customers, I do whatever job anyone asks me.
More then that I get up at 6:30am to be there and work the morning shift after about 1 hour of sleep.
But I don't smile enough, I don't constantly have a grin on my face.
Jesus. I can't believe it's such a big problem, unfortunately Starbucks seems to think that if you're not grinning your ass off you're being rude. It just doesn't come naturally to me to smile so much. I tend to have a neutral sort of face, but apparently it's classified as "sullen" to other people, it's not intended that way though.
I'm never rude, I talk to customers, ask them things, smile when it's called for. Do I carry on a whole conversation like Miss America would? No.
I got talked to for it though. The District Manager told my Manager that "That girl over there needs to smile more. She looks like she doesn’t want to be here and y'know that's not good customer service."
My manager spent the rest of the day reminding me of this every five minutes.
"Smile!"
"Angelique *grins* remember your happy face."
"Hey, there's a customer, remember big, big smile."
I don't think I've ever had to be so falsely happy before. And I don't think I've ever looked so falsely happy either.
Curses on Starbucks, they stress me out, I'm quitting and getting a nice job at a library.