Fic: Been Here Before
Another fic inspired by the st_xi_kink Kink Meme. This one did not turn out how I was expecting. I am not sure about my Sulu voice but *shrugs* here it is!
Title: Been Here Before
Pairing: Kirk/Sulu; Sulu and Chekov friendship
Prompt: Kirk and Sulu develop kind of a regular post-adrenaline-rush friends-with-benefits thing, after the Enterprise's inevitable various brushes with death.
Rating: NC-17 for graphic sex, not-graphic violence, and language
Disclaimer: Kirk, Sulu, and the Enterprise are not mine. I just play with them for fun and not profit
Author's notes: The title is from Notion by Kings of Leon. Once again, I have no beta so feel free to point out typos, mistakes, or leave concrit. I love it all!
It’s the same thing every time. Sulu will slip away from the group of victorious or mourning crewmembers - it’s usually some of both - because he can’t stand to be around that much talking when he’s just seen someone die. The inescapable reality that it could have been him, might be him next time, leaves his skin crawling and his muscles painfully tense. He finds somewhere quiet without anyone realizing he has left.
Usually, the captain follows him.
The first time had been the most confusing sexual experience of his life. He had still been lying breathless on the transporter pad when he had realized Kirk was hard. From there, it was a blur of Chekov talking excitedly, Spock disappearing, and Kirk muttering as he dragged him to an empty room near the transporter room - Sulu later learned it was briefing room 19B. The door had barely closed before he felt Kirk breathing heavily on his neck and a calloused hand sliding into his trousers. From the moment Sulu felt Kirk’s hand wrap around his half-hard dick, part of Sulu’s brain turned off and another turned on. He didn’t think as he reached a hand into Kirk’s trousers. Thrusting his hips into Kirk’s grip was as second nature as the motions of advance lunge, thrust, forward recovery, en garde. Kirk’s dry hand was starting to chafe and he assumed his hand was causing equal amounts of pleasure/pain for Kirk, but the twin sensations just spurred them both on. He could barely hear Kirk’s muttered cursing over the sound of his blood pounding.
In the moment of clarity before orgasm, Sulu watched Kirk’s face go slack and open. It was the perfect counterpoint to the feeling of the man’s cock pulsing in his hand and Sulu quickly followed, throwing his head back at the pleasure rolling through him.
After a few moments, Kirk’s eyes met his and Sulu was surprised at the look of determination and focus that were now on the man’s face. They quickly separated and busied themselves with cleaning their hands and adjusting their clothing. All the while, Sulu wanted to shake Jim and ask a hundred questions, starting with “What the hell was that?” and ending with “When can we do it again?” Kirk was so relaxed, though, that Sulu found himself following suit.
It wasn’t until they stepped outside and everyone is still debating whether Spock should have gone down to Vulcan that Sulu realizes the entire thing couldn’t have been more than two or three minutes.
Everyone had been completely focused after that with concern over Earth and Kirk and Spock disappearing on a suicidal mission to save… well, everything. Then he didn’t hear anything from Kirk for days once they were back on Earth and he decided that Kirk had forgotten, that it would never happen again.
It did happen again, three months after they left Earth again. What should have been a quick peace-keeping mission on a planet resulted in two security officers bleeding out by his feet and another barely standing upright up by the captain. By the time they were beamed back up to the ship, the third officer - Weis was his name - had collapsed and Kirk’s face was bleeding and starting to bruise. Sulu had been thrown and landed wrong. He had a limp and long, deep scrape on his shoulder and side to show for it.
The medical officers rushed to the fallen security officer and Sulu rushed to the nearby bathroom. He was still gingerly wiping his face when he heard the door open and then close behind him. Sulu knew it was Kirk even before he felt the captain’s hands on his hips. Their eyes met in the mirror then and Sulu was struck again by how beat the captain was. His eyes must have showed concern because Kirk tried to smile and ended up just wincing.
Like the first time, they barely talked as Kirk slid Sulu’s trousers off his hips and down his legs. Kirk cocked an eyebrow in questioning and Sulu considered for only a moment before nodding and spreading his legs wider. It was impossible not to watch in the mirror as Kirk stuck two fingers in his own mouth and sucked them, wetting them completely before reaching between Sulu’s legs. He felt the burn through his entire body but quickly willed himself to relax and soon Kirk had three fingers thrusting and twisting inside him. Sulu groaned appreciatively when Kirk added more saliva and then again when Kirk finally lined himself up and eased into him.
Sulu couldn’t think at all - not about his knee and shoulder, not about Weis, not about how fucked up this all was - as the captain started thrusting shallowly. All he could feel was the sensation of fullness in his ass and the fleeting sparks of bone-deep bliss every time Kirk would brush his prostate. The world narrowed to another person’s hands on his hips and another person’s pleasure being whispered in his ear until Kirk went still suddenly and came inside him. Sulu leaned against the sink for a few more moments, relishing the feeling of the throbbing in his ass, and then resumed stroking himself. Kirk’s hand knocked his away to claim Sulu’s cock. With only a few strokes, Sulu emptied himself into the sink in front of him.
Afterwards, they cleaned themselves up and were both washing their hands when Jim said, without quite looking at him, “Heh. Good planning, coming in here. Easy clean-up.” Sulu wanted to tell him that he actually came in here because he thought he would be sick with the pain in his knee and the memory of a man’s blood spreading on the ground. It seems pointless, though, even mean. He knew the captain was just as bothered by what had happened as we was. At least, he thought so, even if Kirk now had that cocky grin on his face that Sulu kind of hated.
Instead Sulu just nodded jerkily as Kirk dried his hands and walked out of the bathroom. Sulu counted to sixty before following after him, not that anyone noticed when he returned after the captain.
After the second time, there was no change in how Kirk treated him and Sulu chalked it up to the man having a thing for danger. He couldn’t help but wonder when the captain went on mission with other officers which one of them was getting fucked afterwards. He concentrated on his work, though, and did not let it bother him.
The third time, Sulu had time to get to his quarters and take a hurried shower before there is a knock at his door. There was no one else that would come to his door now - not with Pavel sedated in the sickbay - so he said “come in” without worrying that he only had a towel around his waist.
Kirk looked as bad as he’d ever seen him. He wasn’t hurt, other than some small cuts on his face from the explosion that had injured Chekov. Kirk’s eyes were narrowed, though, and he moved without his usual grace and energy.
Suddenly, Sulu didn’t have the energy for whatever Kirk had in mind this time. His best friend was recovering from a broken arm and a concussion and Kirk had been the one to give the orders to start the blast when he knew Chekov had just finished setting the damn thing up. It was a miracle Chekov wasn’t dead and now the captain wanted to fuck him and then act like nothing had happened?
Well, fuck that.
“Sorry, captain, I don’t feel up for anything right now,” Sulu couldn’t even stand to see Kirk’s face at that moment he turned around before he could see Kirk’s reaction. He opened a drawer to reach for a shirt but before he could pick one up, Kirk’s hand was batting his out of the way and slamming the drawer shut.
“Damn it!” Before he realized what he was doing, Sulu had slammed his elbow into Kirk’s chest. The captain was a little bigger than he was but the force was enough to send him staggering backwards against the wall.
Sulu’s heart was racing with anger and the dawning realization that he had just assaulted his superior officer. Kirk just stared at him, his mouth open like he couldn’t get enough air.
“What the hell was that?” Sulu finally managed to ask.
Kirk shook his head, seemingly unable to get the words out. Instead, he grabbed Sulu and pulled him until their foreheads were touching. Kirk was breathing heavily and his eyes were closed. Anger, fear, defeat was written all over his face. Sulu pulled back a few inches, feeling stunned. The captain never showed fear.
Without opening his eyes, Kirk pulled Sulu close again and crashed their mouths together. There was no tenderness in the kiss, only teeth and tongue and a battle for dominance. Each time Sulu bit Kirk’s lip or thrust his tongue inside Kirk’s mouth, he felt some of the rigidity leave Kirk’s body. A few minutes later, Sulu was finally able to concentrate on the feel of Jim’s body and the ache in his cock instead of Chekov’s face twisted with pain as he was rushed to sickbay. After that, it was almost easy to turn the captain around until he’s facing the wall and grind his hips against Kirk’s ass.
Kirk’s response was a deep groan and a tilt of his hips that brought his ass against Sulu again.
“Hey,” Sulu asked. He was a little surprised to hear his voice because they never talked when they did this. “You want me to fuck you?”
Kirk kept his gaze on the wall in front of him, so Sulu couldn’t see the look on his face. He did see how Kirk’s body shifted as if he couldn’t stand to be still for the five seconds it took to make a decision. Then he nodded.
Sulu squeezed Kirk’s shoulder in acknowledgement before moving away to retrieve the lube from the drawer by his bed. By the time he had turned back around, Kirk was unzipping his pants. He rolled his eyes when he saw what Sulu was holding. “Don’t need that.”
“Believe me, I’m not taking you dry.” Kirk opened his mouth to argue and Sulu shook his head. God, the captain was messed up sometimes. “You want this, we’re doing it my way this time.”
Kirk had to be told twice to move to the bed. Once he was spread out on his stomach on Sulu’s sheets, he impatiently demanded that Sulu skip preparing him. Frustrated, Sulu slammed the bottle of lube on the bed and glared. “You are going to have to trust me on this. You trust me out there to watch your back, you trust me to not kill you for getting Chekov hurt,” Kirk’s shoulder tensed at this but Sulu continued. “You can trust me to fuck you.”
Sulu took his silence as agreement. The captain let him finish and didn’t complain when Sulu lifted him unto his hands and knees. Sulu knew what Kirk wanted, though, and as soon as his cock was lined up, he thrust inside in one long push. Kirk went rigid below him, a low moan welling up from his throat. After a few focused breaths, he relaxed again. Sulu withdrew slowly and pushed forward again, just a little faster this time. With each thrust after that, he focused on getting as deep inside Kirk as he could and tilting his hips in different ways so he hit every part of Kirk’s channel.
For his part, Kirk pushed back with each thrust. And, god, he was so tight that Sulu knew he couldn’t do this often. It made the sensations that much sharper to imagine the pangs of pain that he knew he must be causing.
As good as it felt, Sulu never forgot what the captain needed from this. He let his hand wander to the few bruises that had been hidden under Kirk’s shirt and caressed them lightly with his roaming hands. Kirk rewarded him with an eager whine and bore down even harder on Sulu’s cock with the next thrust.
The sex felt like they were trying to escape everything for just a few minutes. It felt like an apology and forgiveness to each other and themselves for not being quicker, tougher, and stronger. For not saving everyone.
Too soon, Sulu felt his orgasm approaching and was glad to see one of Kirk’s hand move to stroke himself. He leaned forward, covering the captain’s back with his chest, and strengthened his thrusts. When he felt Kirk start to tremble, he couldn’t hold back any longer and with one last push, he groaned and poured his release into Kirk’s body. Moments later, Kirk muttered “Ooooh fuck” and clamped his ass so hard around Sulu’s still pulsing dick that Sulu saw starts.
They lay side by side for a few minutes afterwards. Sulu wasn’t too exhausted to consider how weird it was to be laying in a bed with the captain. From what he’d heard, Kirk rarely gave his partners time to catch their breaths before running out the door. Maybe he was just too sore to move.
Finally, Kirk spoke. “We had one chance with the explosives. The Gorn’s knew we were coming. Any longer and they would have gotten those crystals out of there and we would have all been dead.”
Sulu closed his eyes and sighed. “Yeah, I know.” He thought about the people who had gathered outside sickbay to check on Pavel. “Lots of people are still going to be mad.”
“I know. Everyone loves Chekov.” Kirk’s voice was unusually affectionate. For a moment, Sulu wondered how hard it might have been to make the call to detonate the explosives when he did.
Sulu turned his face so he could see Kirk. “You going to fuck everyone that’s mad at you?”
Kirk chuckled and rubbed his eyes. “Nah. Would get a little tiring.”
“Look tired enough after just one.”
“Yeah. Should get back to my quarters.” He didn’t get up, though. Sulu could hear his breathing getting deeper and more regular.
’I should tell him to leave before he falls asleep,’ Sulu thought to himself. ’I should tell him to leave and not come to me whenever he gets someone killed.’ He didn’t do either one. Somehow, he was okay with that.
Title: Been Here Before
Pairing: Kirk/Sulu; Sulu and Chekov friendship
Prompt: Kirk and Sulu develop kind of a regular post-adrenaline-rush friends-with-benefits thing, after the Enterprise's inevitable various brushes with death.
Rating: NC-17 for graphic sex, not-graphic violence, and language
Disclaimer: Kirk, Sulu, and the Enterprise are not mine. I just play with them for fun and not profit
Author's notes: The title is from Notion by Kings of Leon. Once again, I have no beta so feel free to point out typos, mistakes, or leave concrit. I love it all!
It’s the same thing every time. Sulu will slip away from the group of victorious or mourning crewmembers - it’s usually some of both - because he can’t stand to be around that much talking when he’s just seen someone die. The inescapable reality that it could have been him, might be him next time, leaves his skin crawling and his muscles painfully tense. He finds somewhere quiet without anyone realizing he has left.
Usually, the captain follows him.
The first time had been the most confusing sexual experience of his life. He had still been lying breathless on the transporter pad when he had realized Kirk was hard. From there, it was a blur of Chekov talking excitedly, Spock disappearing, and Kirk muttering as he dragged him to an empty room near the transporter room - Sulu later learned it was briefing room 19B. The door had barely closed before he felt Kirk breathing heavily on his neck and a calloused hand sliding into his trousers. From the moment Sulu felt Kirk’s hand wrap around his half-hard dick, part of Sulu’s brain turned off and another turned on. He didn’t think as he reached a hand into Kirk’s trousers. Thrusting his hips into Kirk’s grip was as second nature as the motions of advance lunge, thrust, forward recovery, en garde. Kirk’s dry hand was starting to chafe and he assumed his hand was causing equal amounts of pleasure/pain for Kirk, but the twin sensations just spurred them both on. He could barely hear Kirk’s muttered cursing over the sound of his blood pounding.
In the moment of clarity before orgasm, Sulu watched Kirk’s face go slack and open. It was the perfect counterpoint to the feeling of the man’s cock pulsing in his hand and Sulu quickly followed, throwing his head back at the pleasure rolling through him.
After a few moments, Kirk’s eyes met his and Sulu was surprised at the look of determination and focus that were now on the man’s face. They quickly separated and busied themselves with cleaning their hands and adjusting their clothing. All the while, Sulu wanted to shake Jim and ask a hundred questions, starting with “What the hell was that?” and ending with “When can we do it again?” Kirk was so relaxed, though, that Sulu found himself following suit.
It wasn’t until they stepped outside and everyone is still debating whether Spock should have gone down to Vulcan that Sulu realizes the entire thing couldn’t have been more than two or three minutes.
Everyone had been completely focused after that with concern over Earth and Kirk and Spock disappearing on a suicidal mission to save… well, everything. Then he didn’t hear anything from Kirk for days once they were back on Earth and he decided that Kirk had forgotten, that it would never happen again.
It did happen again, three months after they left Earth again. What should have been a quick peace-keeping mission on a planet resulted in two security officers bleeding out by his feet and another barely standing upright up by the captain. By the time they were beamed back up to the ship, the third officer - Weis was his name - had collapsed and Kirk’s face was bleeding and starting to bruise. Sulu had been thrown and landed wrong. He had a limp and long, deep scrape on his shoulder and side to show for it.
The medical officers rushed to the fallen security officer and Sulu rushed to the nearby bathroom. He was still gingerly wiping his face when he heard the door open and then close behind him. Sulu knew it was Kirk even before he felt the captain’s hands on his hips. Their eyes met in the mirror then and Sulu was struck again by how beat the captain was. His eyes must have showed concern because Kirk tried to smile and ended up just wincing.
Like the first time, they barely talked as Kirk slid Sulu’s trousers off his hips and down his legs. Kirk cocked an eyebrow in questioning and Sulu considered for only a moment before nodding and spreading his legs wider. It was impossible not to watch in the mirror as Kirk stuck two fingers in his own mouth and sucked them, wetting them completely before reaching between Sulu’s legs. He felt the burn through his entire body but quickly willed himself to relax and soon Kirk had three fingers thrusting and twisting inside him. Sulu groaned appreciatively when Kirk added more saliva and then again when Kirk finally lined himself up and eased into him.
Sulu couldn’t think at all - not about his knee and shoulder, not about Weis, not about how fucked up this all was - as the captain started thrusting shallowly. All he could feel was the sensation of fullness in his ass and the fleeting sparks of bone-deep bliss every time Kirk would brush his prostate. The world narrowed to another person’s hands on his hips and another person’s pleasure being whispered in his ear until Kirk went still suddenly and came inside him. Sulu leaned against the sink for a few more moments, relishing the feeling of the throbbing in his ass, and then resumed stroking himself. Kirk’s hand knocked his away to claim Sulu’s cock. With only a few strokes, Sulu emptied himself into the sink in front of him.
Afterwards, they cleaned themselves up and were both washing their hands when Jim said, without quite looking at him, “Heh. Good planning, coming in here. Easy clean-up.” Sulu wanted to tell him that he actually came in here because he thought he would be sick with the pain in his knee and the memory of a man’s blood spreading on the ground. It seems pointless, though, even mean. He knew the captain was just as bothered by what had happened as we was. At least, he thought so, even if Kirk now had that cocky grin on his face that Sulu kind of hated.
Instead Sulu just nodded jerkily as Kirk dried his hands and walked out of the bathroom. Sulu counted to sixty before following after him, not that anyone noticed when he returned after the captain.
After the second time, there was no change in how Kirk treated him and Sulu chalked it up to the man having a thing for danger. He couldn’t help but wonder when the captain went on mission with other officers which one of them was getting fucked afterwards. He concentrated on his work, though, and did not let it bother him.
The third time, Sulu had time to get to his quarters and take a hurried shower before there is a knock at his door. There was no one else that would come to his door now - not with Pavel sedated in the sickbay - so he said “come in” without worrying that he only had a towel around his waist.
Kirk looked as bad as he’d ever seen him. He wasn’t hurt, other than some small cuts on his face from the explosion that had injured Chekov. Kirk’s eyes were narrowed, though, and he moved without his usual grace and energy.
Suddenly, Sulu didn’t have the energy for whatever Kirk had in mind this time. His best friend was recovering from a broken arm and a concussion and Kirk had been the one to give the orders to start the blast when he knew Chekov had just finished setting the damn thing up. It was a miracle Chekov wasn’t dead and now the captain wanted to fuck him and then act like nothing had happened?
Well, fuck that.
“Sorry, captain, I don’t feel up for anything right now,” Sulu couldn’t even stand to see Kirk’s face at that moment he turned around before he could see Kirk’s reaction. He opened a drawer to reach for a shirt but before he could pick one up, Kirk’s hand was batting his out of the way and slamming the drawer shut.
“Damn it!” Before he realized what he was doing, Sulu had slammed his elbow into Kirk’s chest. The captain was a little bigger than he was but the force was enough to send him staggering backwards against the wall.
Sulu’s heart was racing with anger and the dawning realization that he had just assaulted his superior officer. Kirk just stared at him, his mouth open like he couldn’t get enough air.
“What the hell was that?” Sulu finally managed to ask.
Kirk shook his head, seemingly unable to get the words out. Instead, he grabbed Sulu and pulled him until their foreheads were touching. Kirk was breathing heavily and his eyes were closed. Anger, fear, defeat was written all over his face. Sulu pulled back a few inches, feeling stunned. The captain never showed fear.
Without opening his eyes, Kirk pulled Sulu close again and crashed their mouths together. There was no tenderness in the kiss, only teeth and tongue and a battle for dominance. Each time Sulu bit Kirk’s lip or thrust his tongue inside Kirk’s mouth, he felt some of the rigidity leave Kirk’s body. A few minutes later, Sulu was finally able to concentrate on the feel of Jim’s body and the ache in his cock instead of Chekov’s face twisted with pain as he was rushed to sickbay. After that, it was almost easy to turn the captain around until he’s facing the wall and grind his hips against Kirk’s ass.
Kirk’s response was a deep groan and a tilt of his hips that brought his ass against Sulu again.
“Hey,” Sulu asked. He was a little surprised to hear his voice because they never talked when they did this. “You want me to fuck you?”
Kirk kept his gaze on the wall in front of him, so Sulu couldn’t see the look on his face. He did see how Kirk’s body shifted as if he couldn’t stand to be still for the five seconds it took to make a decision. Then he nodded.
Sulu squeezed Kirk’s shoulder in acknowledgement before moving away to retrieve the lube from the drawer by his bed. By the time he had turned back around, Kirk was unzipping his pants. He rolled his eyes when he saw what Sulu was holding. “Don’t need that.”
“Believe me, I’m not taking you dry.” Kirk opened his mouth to argue and Sulu shook his head. God, the captain was messed up sometimes. “You want this, we’re doing it my way this time.”
Kirk had to be told twice to move to the bed. Once he was spread out on his stomach on Sulu’s sheets, he impatiently demanded that Sulu skip preparing him. Frustrated, Sulu slammed the bottle of lube on the bed and glared. “You are going to have to trust me on this. You trust me out there to watch your back, you trust me to not kill you for getting Chekov hurt,” Kirk’s shoulder tensed at this but Sulu continued. “You can trust me to fuck you.”
Sulu took his silence as agreement. The captain let him finish and didn’t complain when Sulu lifted him unto his hands and knees. Sulu knew what Kirk wanted, though, and as soon as his cock was lined up, he thrust inside in one long push. Kirk went rigid below him, a low moan welling up from his throat. After a few focused breaths, he relaxed again. Sulu withdrew slowly and pushed forward again, just a little faster this time. With each thrust after that, he focused on getting as deep inside Kirk as he could and tilting his hips in different ways so he hit every part of Kirk’s channel.
For his part, Kirk pushed back with each thrust. And, god, he was so tight that Sulu knew he couldn’t do this often. It made the sensations that much sharper to imagine the pangs of pain that he knew he must be causing.
As good as it felt, Sulu never forgot what the captain needed from this. He let his hand wander to the few bruises that had been hidden under Kirk’s shirt and caressed them lightly with his roaming hands. Kirk rewarded him with an eager whine and bore down even harder on Sulu’s cock with the next thrust.
The sex felt like they were trying to escape everything for just a few minutes. It felt like an apology and forgiveness to each other and themselves for not being quicker, tougher, and stronger. For not saving everyone.
Too soon, Sulu felt his orgasm approaching and was glad to see one of Kirk’s hand move to stroke himself. He leaned forward, covering the captain’s back with his chest, and strengthened his thrusts. When he felt Kirk start to tremble, he couldn’t hold back any longer and with one last push, he groaned and poured his release into Kirk’s body. Moments later, Kirk muttered “Ooooh fuck” and clamped his ass so hard around Sulu’s still pulsing dick that Sulu saw starts.
They lay side by side for a few minutes afterwards. Sulu wasn’t too exhausted to consider how weird it was to be laying in a bed with the captain. From what he’d heard, Kirk rarely gave his partners time to catch their breaths before running out the door. Maybe he was just too sore to move.
Finally, Kirk spoke. “We had one chance with the explosives. The Gorn’s knew we were coming. Any longer and they would have gotten those crystals out of there and we would have all been dead.”
Sulu closed his eyes and sighed. “Yeah, I know.” He thought about the people who had gathered outside sickbay to check on Pavel. “Lots of people are still going to be mad.”
“I know. Everyone loves Chekov.” Kirk’s voice was unusually affectionate. For a moment, Sulu wondered how hard it might have been to make the call to detonate the explosives when he did.
Sulu turned his face so he could see Kirk. “You going to fuck everyone that’s mad at you?”
Kirk chuckled and rubbed his eyes. “Nah. Would get a little tiring.”
“Look tired enough after just one.”
“Yeah. Should get back to my quarters.” He didn’t get up, though. Sulu could hear his breathing getting deeper and more regular.
’I should tell him to leave before he falls asleep,’ Sulu thought to himself. ’I should tell him to leave and not come to me whenever he gets someone killed.’ He didn’t do either one. Somehow, he was okay with that.