(no subject)
so the "overwrought emotions" which governed my livejournal are being tamed
insofar as you can tame what is intrinsic to my very nature, i guess
i suppose, i'm changing my reaction to things
i've had to wake up early to be ready for work (so livejournal, i must leave you very shortly!)
and i was all relaxed and happy in the sun, listening to sigur ros (i know they're a bit more of a cold weather sort of band, but it worked, trust me)
and i borrowed ramzy's laptop, checked facebook, and it all just made me feel a little more stressed
but i couldn't see any point to feeling a bit weird
because
the other day i was walking home at midnight, broken social scene as my chaperone
and i felt lonely. and i know i was alone, but i felt that sort of loneliness which feels like it can't be solved with other people or anything
and i thought of how some of my younger friends felt the same way (and older, i'm sure everyone feels this way sometimes)
and i just stopped feeling sorry for myself and realised that if my friends look to me and see me reacting
negatively to everything then it's going to set a precedent for everyone
as though the things i think i'm looking for become these things that are vital
when they're not at all
when i joined the music library, i asked the president to fix my life
and all through the year, i wondered when it was going to be fixed
so many relationships were formed from the music library
and i waited and wondered
until i realised that everything was fine
everything had been fixed
the library knew what was most important and fixed it
i just needed lots of friends around me
i only need lots of friends around me
insofar as you can tame what is intrinsic to my very nature, i guess
i suppose, i'm changing my reaction to things
i've had to wake up early to be ready for work (so livejournal, i must leave you very shortly!)
and i was all relaxed and happy in the sun, listening to sigur ros (i know they're a bit more of a cold weather sort of band, but it worked, trust me)
and i borrowed ramzy's laptop, checked facebook, and it all just made me feel a little more stressed
but i couldn't see any point to feeling a bit weird
because
the other day i was walking home at midnight, broken social scene as my chaperone
and i felt lonely. and i know i was alone, but i felt that sort of loneliness which feels like it can't be solved with other people or anything
and i thought of how some of my younger friends felt the same way (and older, i'm sure everyone feels this way sometimes)
and i just stopped feeling sorry for myself and realised that if my friends look to me and see me reacting
negatively to everything then it's going to set a precedent for everyone
as though the things i think i'm looking for become these things that are vital
when they're not at all
when i joined the music library, i asked the president to fix my life
and all through the year, i wondered when it was going to be fixed
so many relationships were formed from the music library
and i waited and wondered
until i realised that everything was fine
everything had been fixed
the library knew what was most important and fixed it
i just needed lots of friends around me
i only need lots of friends around me