(no subject)

[tonylover]

fuck. i'm really sick of this shit. every fucking thing is going wrong i really don't know what to do. i FEEL like fucking dying. but you know, i'm scared shitless of dying. so fuck that idea right right. like, my brother had to fucking clean the toilet, big fucking deal man, and i was screaming at him cos he fucking wouldn't do it and he was meant to this morning when i was fucking babysitting. but noooooo he's such a cunt and is so fucking lazy, so i was saying how i fucking needed to get out of the house because i can't fucking stand the shit here anymore, and he is all, 'you're not the only one' and he fulled fucking siked up and got me against the wall WHILE he had a jug of boiling water in his hand so that went all over my fucking back and i had my coffee and dinner in my hand and my coffee spilled all the fuck over me and all over the floor and on my fucking pork chop and my back hurts like hell and i'm so fucking scared it's going to scar, which fucking sucks and i don't want it to because i don't want to model with mae over in london if i have a fucking desfigured back, jesus fucking christ, and just every other fucking thing that can fucking go wrong is and i can't fuckingjsdkjfjkvbhvbh  i don't care, i really don't, i could not fucking care less about anything right now, i just want to fucking die, and look at that, i'm contradicting myself, way to be a cunt tegan, way to fucking go. and i feel really sorry for mae because she had to sit there on webcam for fucking half an hour while she was sick and tired and wanted to go to bed, while i was sitting there being selfish and crying and she was trying to calm me down and i was just eing a difficult fucking shit. god, i'd go and get cmpletely fucking pissed off my face except for i promised laura i wouldn't fucking drink. it's just fucking ridiculous, and people wonder why i have anxiety and depression and fucking bi polar and all that fucking shit i ahve. it's the shit hole i live in that does it.

there's other shit about certain dead people as well, but i'm not even going to get into that because people already think i',m and hat off the mad hatters fucking tea party, so fuck. i'll just keep that in too shall i. yes i think i will.

tl;dr rite guys?
i'm sorry, i really am, i hate when i get like this, and i'm sorry you wonderful people need to read it, you know, don't fucking read it if you don't want to.