Why Lie?
I've had so much going on lately that every time I sit down to write I don't know where to start and end up blowing the whole thing off. But I'm determined to get over the hump (haha), so here goes...
I'm working on a redesign of the main Bay City Blues phone sex website. This is the first time I have attempted anything of this scale, and it's much more complicated that making the kind of blogsites I've been doing for the other BCB girls. Obviously there are a ton of pages, plus there are scripts for making the girls show available, unavailable, and on the phone. I'm such a novice that every time I get one thing figured out, I run into something else I don't know how to do. But I'm the kind of person who learns best by doing, so even though it's frustrating, I know I have to slog through the trials and errors. I don't want to give too much away yet, because this is going to take me a while, but I think it will be pretty cool when all is said and done.
Had an audition the other day for a commercial, and I honestly don't know why I bother. Ok, well yes I do. My friend called and asked me to come in, and I never turn him down. I need experience in auditions and especially on film, because...I SUCK!!! Seriously. I have no idea what to do in front of a camera and the first thing that happens is I lose my lines. To make matters worse, I was auditioning with another actress, and I'm sure she just thought it was the most terrible excuse for acting ever. *sigh*
The thing is, I'm so comfortable on stage. I have unshakeable confidence in my acting for the theatre. I don't get why tv/film is so hard for me. And I think it has become such a big deal that I sabotage myself in auditions by not preparing properly. But then the other side of me goes, "I don't WANT to fucking prepare for a damn real estate commercial!" I think I either need to stop torturing myself and start turning down these types of auditions, or I need to make it my goal to actually get cast in one and work hard to get it done. Ambivalence and apathy are getting me nowhere, so it's time to hitch my cart to some different ponies.
Tomorrow I am going to a planning party for the Masturbate-A-Thon...How funny a visual is that? Lol! But I am really looking forward to meeting some local deviants who are into art and performance and sex. I have already started outlining my piece for the show, although it won't be completely scripted since I like working off the audience. Plus, I get to be raunchier than the last time, so it's going to be even more fun. You know me- the fewer limits, the better! *winks*
On Monday, Howard and I went to the Taste of the Nation: Portland, the equivalent of a culinary orgasm that also happens to benefit some great charities. There were yummy sips and nibbles from over 100 local wineries, breweries, distilleries, restaurants, and specialty stores. Unbelievable! It's pretty spendy, but 100% of the proceeds go to very deserving hunger charities, so it's easy for me to rationalize. Lol. It also gave the budding foodie in me a whole slew of new restaurants I want to try...Oooh! That reminds me I wanted to go find all my restaurant reviews from PortlandFood.org and repost them here. But it will have to wait until after I make a blogsite for new BCB phone sex vixen, Juliana...
***PHONE SEX SPOILER***
I've been meaning to write this for days, so here goes...Skip the rest of this entry if you live in a fantasy world and don't understand how the phone sex business works.
This past week I got a phone call from an ex-contractor who claimed that by putting up a recent character using the same model she does, BCB had made a personal attack on her. The sheer lunacy of her complaint astounds me. First of all, I hadn't given this person a thought in over a year at least, so she's flattering herself to think it was an attack of any sort aimed at her.
We did not attempt to duplicate her phone sex character- the name is different, as is the persona. That's our way of letting our intelligent customers know we're not trying to sell them a different girl than the one they might have gotten to like who used the same model. How fun is trying to call a girl you like, only to get a stranger? It used to be common practice for companies (including BCB in the beginning) to have different operators play an existing character, but this is much less accepted now.
I feel that model choice is a hugely important part of putting together a phone sex profile, as the model is literally the online face of the operator and should be representative of her personality and sexuality. But there is a distinction between just the model and the complete character. I have stated many times before that I believe the best operators are the ones who put the most of themselves into their phone sex persona. I believe it so strongly, that I am one of the few pso's I know who uses both my own real name and my own photographs.
Of course, I do see why this ex-BCB girl is upset. She has been misleading her callers for years and claiming to be the model in the photographs she uses. Anyone could go right now, buy those pictures, and put up a phone sex character using that model. Yet she thinks BCB doing it was a personal attack on her. Did I know she was using the pictures when I let a new operator choose that model? Yes. Just like I know that ANY web model I might purchase photos of may be used by any other phone sex or "dating" website who wants to buy the same photos. This is how it works, unless you purchase exclusive rights to specific photo sets and/or models.
Bay City Blues paid good money for that content. Why should I waste legally purchased and fully licensed photographs because she has been dishonest with her callers? I'm sitting here shaking my head, days later, because it belies such unfamiliarity with the standard practices of a business this person has been in for years now. How do you stay in a business for so long without knowing how it works?
I do believe that one of the best things we have done is to stop asking our girls to lie to clients who know better. (Have you ever seen a porno for fuck's sake? Recognize anyone? Sheesh!) And "coming out" has been so liberating for me personally, my heart actually goes out to the sexy sirens who live in fear and therefore limit their own potential. My choice is not the decision I expect everyone to make, but I won't be bound by their deceptions either.
All I can say is if you don't want to be worried about being exposed as a fake or defending yourself from what you see as copycat characters, try doing something nobody else can do better than you- BE YOURSELF.
And oh yeah...
Hehehe.
Love,
Tonya
I'm working on a redesign of the main Bay City Blues phone sex website. This is the first time I have attempted anything of this scale, and it's much more complicated that making the kind of blogsites I've been doing for the other BCB girls. Obviously there are a ton of pages, plus there are scripts for making the girls show available, unavailable, and on the phone. I'm such a novice that every time I get one thing figured out, I run into something else I don't know how to do. But I'm the kind of person who learns best by doing, so even though it's frustrating, I know I have to slog through the trials and errors. I don't want to give too much away yet, because this is going to take me a while, but I think it will be pretty cool when all is said and done.
Had an audition the other day for a commercial, and I honestly don't know why I bother. Ok, well yes I do. My friend called and asked me to come in, and I never turn him down. I need experience in auditions and especially on film, because...I SUCK!!! Seriously. I have no idea what to do in front of a camera and the first thing that happens is I lose my lines. To make matters worse, I was auditioning with another actress, and I'm sure she just thought it was the most terrible excuse for acting ever. *sigh*
The thing is, I'm so comfortable on stage. I have unshakeable confidence in my acting for the theatre. I don't get why tv/film is so hard for me. And I think it has become such a big deal that I sabotage myself in auditions by not preparing properly. But then the other side of me goes, "I don't WANT to fucking prepare for a damn real estate commercial!" I think I either need to stop torturing myself and start turning down these types of auditions, or I need to make it my goal to actually get cast in one and work hard to get it done. Ambivalence and apathy are getting me nowhere, so it's time to hitch my cart to some different ponies.
Tomorrow I am going to a planning party for the Masturbate-A-Thon...How funny a visual is that? Lol! But I am really looking forward to meeting some local deviants who are into art and performance and sex. I have already started outlining my piece for the show, although it won't be completely scripted since I like working off the audience. Plus, I get to be raunchier than the last time, so it's going to be even more fun. You know me- the fewer limits, the better! *winks*
On Monday, Howard and I went to the Taste of the Nation: Portland, the equivalent of a culinary orgasm that also happens to benefit some great charities. There were yummy sips and nibbles from over 100 local wineries, breweries, distilleries, restaurants, and specialty stores. Unbelievable! It's pretty spendy, but 100% of the proceeds go to very deserving hunger charities, so it's easy for me to rationalize. Lol. It also gave the budding foodie in me a whole slew of new restaurants I want to try...Oooh! That reminds me I wanted to go find all my restaurant reviews from PortlandFood.org and repost them here. But it will have to wait until after I make a blogsite for new BCB phone sex vixen, Juliana...
***PHONE SEX SPOILER***
I've been meaning to write this for days, so here goes...Skip the rest of this entry if you live in a fantasy world and don't understand how the phone sex business works.
This past week I got a phone call from an ex-contractor who claimed that by putting up a recent character using the same model she does, BCB had made a personal attack on her. The sheer lunacy of her complaint astounds me. First of all, I hadn't given this person a thought in over a year at least, so she's flattering herself to think it was an attack of any sort aimed at her.
We did not attempt to duplicate her phone sex character- the name is different, as is the persona. That's our way of letting our intelligent customers know we're not trying to sell them a different girl than the one they might have gotten to like who used the same model. How fun is trying to call a girl you like, only to get a stranger? It used to be common practice for companies (including BCB in the beginning) to have different operators play an existing character, but this is much less accepted now.
I feel that model choice is a hugely important part of putting together a phone sex profile, as the model is literally the online face of the operator and should be representative of her personality and sexuality. But there is a distinction between just the model and the complete character. I have stated many times before that I believe the best operators are the ones who put the most of themselves into their phone sex persona. I believe it so strongly, that I am one of the few pso's I know who uses both my own real name and my own photographs.
Of course, I do see why this ex-BCB girl is upset. She has been misleading her callers for years and claiming to be the model in the photographs she uses. Anyone could go right now, buy those pictures, and put up a phone sex character using that model. Yet she thinks BCB doing it was a personal attack on her. Did I know she was using the pictures when I let a new operator choose that model? Yes. Just like I know that ANY web model I might purchase photos of may be used by any other phone sex or "dating" website who wants to buy the same photos. This is how it works, unless you purchase exclusive rights to specific photo sets and/or models.
Bay City Blues paid good money for that content. Why should I waste legally purchased and fully licensed photographs because she has been dishonest with her callers? I'm sitting here shaking my head, days later, because it belies such unfamiliarity with the standard practices of a business this person has been in for years now. How do you stay in a business for so long without knowing how it works?
I do believe that one of the best things we have done is to stop asking our girls to lie to clients who know better. (Have you ever seen a porno for fuck's sake? Recognize anyone? Sheesh!) And "coming out" has been so liberating for me personally, my heart actually goes out to the sexy sirens who live in fear and therefore limit their own potential. My choice is not the decision I expect everyone to make, but I won't be bound by their deceptions either.
All I can say is if you don't want to be worried about being exposed as a fake or defending yourself from what you see as copycat characters, try doing something nobody else can do better than you- BE YOURSELF.
And oh yeah...
Hehehe.
Love,
Tonya