i miss writing.

[tonightximxgone]

looking back at all the beauty
i only found in words
who were not reflected in my face
i shame myself for cutting off
and not letting myself follow the smoke signals
eleven of which told me this is my path
and i denied it to myself
hid it in your hands so i could never touch it
you wouldn't let me touch it
i haven't touched it
i lost it
i lost you.

["who the fuck did she think she was kidding? she never had him anyways."]