"How can it be bullshit to state a preference?"
OPINION:
1. a : a view, judgment, or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter
- Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary
The reason for today's vocabulary lesson is my increasing annoyance with people who tell me that my daughter is very opinionated like it's a negative thing. She does indeed have definite ideas about what she likes or what she wants, and she isn't afraid to share these ideas.
I suppose it's a case of like mother, like daughter - I've often been told that I'm opinionated, and I want to raise my daughter to speak her mind and to make her own decisions about what she likes and wants, and what she doesn't like or want. My own mother, a woman with strong opinions, a woman unafraid to speak her mind, raised my two sisters and me the same way. She wanted the three of us to have our own voices and form our own convictions, and to stand behind them, to be determined, and proud of our decisions, and I want the same for Olivia.
I've noticed that I get a lot of flak for having opinions and sharing them with others during the course of conversation. One of my neighbors has often remarked to me, "You sure do have a lot of opinions," and while I like to think he's teasing, I can't help but notice the inherent sexism in his comment. My standard response has generally been a very sarcastic, "Yeah, I have a vagina AND an opinion, isn't it terrible?"
But it's true, if you think about it. Men who have opinions and who aren't afraid to voice them are often referred to as strong, tenacious, articulate, go-getters. Women, on the other hand, are often referred to as obstinate, headstrong, adamant, hardheaded. Why the negative connotations for women and the more positive adjectives for men? Why is being opinionated seen as a desirable character trait for men, but opinionated women are seen as a bad thing? Who wouldn't want their daughter to grow up to speak her mind? Should I re-think my standard response to people who call me opinionated? Maybe a nice "Yes, I do have a lot of opinions, isn't it great that I live in a country where I'm allowed to tell everyone what I think!"
Have any of you ever been told that you're opinionated? Anyone else experience this with their children? What about those of you who are men, or who have little boys - is there a different attitude about it if you're a man or have a male child?
1. a : a view, judgment, or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter
- Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary
The reason for today's vocabulary lesson is my increasing annoyance with people who tell me that my daughter is very opinionated like it's a negative thing. She does indeed have definite ideas about what she likes or what she wants, and she isn't afraid to share these ideas.
I suppose it's a case of like mother, like daughter - I've often been told that I'm opinionated, and I want to raise my daughter to speak her mind and to make her own decisions about what she likes and wants, and what she doesn't like or want. My own mother, a woman with strong opinions, a woman unafraid to speak her mind, raised my two sisters and me the same way. She wanted the three of us to have our own voices and form our own convictions, and to stand behind them, to be determined, and proud of our decisions, and I want the same for Olivia.
I've noticed that I get a lot of flak for having opinions and sharing them with others during the course of conversation. One of my neighbors has often remarked to me, "You sure do have a lot of opinions," and while I like to think he's teasing, I can't help but notice the inherent sexism in his comment. My standard response has generally been a very sarcastic, "Yeah, I have a vagina AND an opinion, isn't it terrible?"
But it's true, if you think about it. Men who have opinions and who aren't afraid to voice them are often referred to as strong, tenacious, articulate, go-getters. Women, on the other hand, are often referred to as obstinate, headstrong, adamant, hardheaded. Why the negative connotations for women and the more positive adjectives for men? Why is being opinionated seen as a desirable character trait for men, but opinionated women are seen as a bad thing? Who wouldn't want their daughter to grow up to speak her mind? Should I re-think my standard response to people who call me opinionated? Maybe a nice "Yes, I do have a lot of opinions, isn't it great that I live in a country where I'm allowed to tell everyone what I think!"
Have any of you ever been told that you're opinionated? Anyone else experience this with their children? What about those of you who are men, or who have little boys - is there a different attitude about it if you're a man or have a male child?