Official Announcement: Santarchy San Francisco 2004
I'm flying back to San Francisco this weekend on my way to Santacon Tokyo. Through no fault or planning of my own this weekend ALSO happens to be Santarchy San Francisco. Here's a copy of the official public announcement. Please feel free to join matrushkaka and I as we join the red tide. (I'll be bringing Spruce Beer if US Customs will let me into the country with it.)
----------North Pole transmission begin-----------
"You better watch out
You better watch out
You better watch out
You better watch out"
-Santa
WHAT TO BRING:
An unmarked drinking vessel (paper bag/flask) to
supplement bar drinks, CASH for drinks, $5.50 for
ferry (if coming from Oakland), stained and unwashed
Santa suit.
WHAT TO DO/WHAT NOT TO DO:
1. Don't fuck with Santa
2. Don't fuck with the bartenders (have money ready,
know what you want to drink or we will choose for you,
and TIP!)
3. Don't fuck with the law (of any sort...that means
pimply mall security guys on up to cops. SOMEONE ELSE
will always talk to the cops.)
4. Santa likes sluts
WHERE AND WHEN:
Oakland->Ferry->SF
------------------
* Noon - East Bay Gathering
Heinhold's First and Last Chance Saloon 56 Jack London
Square, Oakland
(from BART, use the 12th St. Oakland stop and allow 20
minutes walking time.)
* 1:45 - Ferry Trip: Oakland to SF Ferry Building
Don't be late or you'll be waiting for two hours for
the next ferry.
Purchase tickets onboard the ferry - $5.50 One Way
http://www.eastbayferry.com/when/printable.html
-------
SF->Trouble
------------------
* 2:00pm - San Francisco Santa Gathering
Eddie Rickenbacker's Saloon
133 2nd Street (at Minna) in SF
(from BART or Muni - Montgomery Station, and then walk
1.5 blocks on 2nd St.)
-------
* 3:00ish until city-wide curfew - Grand Santa
Procession
Various high points of city fare and culture will be
visited upon by the merry Santa team, including the
black-veined crack whores who tend to the discerning
gentlemen looking for that something extra. Bring
toys, mistletoe, beer money, lube, elf-sized bondage
gear, and rubber gloves.
-------
If you don't catch us at this point, you better have a
friend who's already with us and who will answer his
cell phone and be aware enough to tell you more than
"There's all these Santas! In a bar!".
THE FOUR FUCKS:
Don't fuck with KIDS
Don't fuck with THE LAW
Don't fuck with SECURITY
DON'T FUCK WITH SANTA
----------North Pole transmission end-----------
----------North Pole transmission begin-----------
"You better watch out
You better watch out
You better watch out
You better watch out"
-Santa
WHAT TO BRING:
An unmarked drinking vessel (paper bag/flask) to
supplement bar drinks, CASH for drinks, $5.50 for
ferry (if coming from Oakland), stained and unwashed
Santa suit.
WHAT TO DO/WHAT NOT TO DO:
1. Don't fuck with Santa
2. Don't fuck with the bartenders (have money ready,
know what you want to drink or we will choose for you,
and TIP!)
3. Don't fuck with the law (of any sort...that means
pimply mall security guys on up to cops. SOMEONE ELSE
will always talk to the cops.)
4. Santa likes sluts
WHERE AND WHEN:
Oakland->Ferry->SF
------------------
* Noon - East Bay Gathering
Heinhold's First and Last Chance Saloon 56 Jack London
Square, Oakland
(from BART, use the 12th St. Oakland stop and allow 20
minutes walking time.)
* 1:45 - Ferry Trip: Oakland to SF Ferry Building
Don't be late or you'll be waiting for two hours for
the next ferry.
Purchase tickets onboard the ferry - $5.50 One Way
http://www.eastbayferry.com/when/printable.html
-------
SF->Trouble
------------------
* 2:00pm - San Francisco Santa Gathering
Eddie Rickenbacker's Saloon
133 2nd Street (at Minna) in SF
(from BART or Muni - Montgomery Station, and then walk
1.5 blocks on 2nd St.)
-------
* 3:00ish until city-wide curfew - Grand Santa
Procession
Various high points of city fare and culture will be
visited upon by the merry Santa team, including the
black-veined crack whores who tend to the discerning
gentlemen looking for that something extra. Bring
toys, mistletoe, beer money, lube, elf-sized bondage
gear, and rubber gloves.
-------
If you don't catch us at this point, you better have a
friend who's already with us and who will answer his
cell phone and be aware enough to tell you more than
"There's all these Santas! In a bar!".
THE FOUR FUCKS:
Don't fuck with KIDS
Don't fuck with THE LAW
Don't fuck with SECURITY
DON'T FUCK WITH SANTA
----------North Pole transmission end-----------