(no subject)
So I was thinking of my faith...and how some might say it's fallen perhaps because of some choices I've made at school. And sometimes I wonder too...what is right, and what does God really expect of me. I thought I wouldn't be happy without being firmly planted in a church group of some sort...but I am. St Tim's was great..I made two of my closest friends there, Bryan and Elizabeth, and I am very VERY thankful for them, they are and were truly blessings in my life. But at the same time, that church, i.e. the youth group was filled with SO much drama, and fakeness, and while these kids may be praising jesus on sundays, their behavior, and by behavior i mean words and how they treated, excluded, and gossiped wasn't right.
I tried the whole "born again" non-denominational christian thing...and honestly it really is not for me, not at all. World Youth Day made me see that wasn't for me, it also made me see some kids true colors. Being religious in high school, also made me very judgemental and I don't want to live life like that, I just want to accept people. It also helped break the first relationship I had that probably could have led to something wonderful, and while I know that now, and he already did.....it's still lost.
So faith for me is something different, I love going to church on sundays, that hour a week is very powerful for me, it lets me reflect, stay calm, and let the stresses of the week go, all with God's help. I believe God is helping me get through all the tough times and situations I have encountered this semester, and through all that has happened I believe he has a plan, like with Alan and even Jenny. I can't wait to see how God's plan has unfolded for me, and while I don't pray a lot, or read the bible, I have faith, and I'm still dependent on Him. And right now, that's all I need. I'm 19, I want to live life...and experience a lot of things, this life is all I've got, and I'm gonna make it good while I still can, with God's guidance.
I tried the whole "born again" non-denominational christian thing...and honestly it really is not for me, not at all. World Youth Day made me see that wasn't for me, it also made me see some kids true colors. Being religious in high school, also made me very judgemental and I don't want to live life like that, I just want to accept people. It also helped break the first relationship I had that probably could have led to something wonderful, and while I know that now, and he already did.....it's still lost.
So faith for me is something different, I love going to church on sundays, that hour a week is very powerful for me, it lets me reflect, stay calm, and let the stresses of the week go, all with God's help. I believe God is helping me get through all the tough times and situations I have encountered this semester, and through all that has happened I believe he has a plan, like with Alan and even Jenny. I can't wait to see how God's plan has unfolded for me, and while I don't pray a lot, or read the bible, I have faith, and I'm still dependent on Him. And right now, that's all I need. I'm 19, I want to live life...and experience a lot of things, this life is all I've got, and I'm gonna make it good while I still can, with God's guidance.