Sad but joyous weekend.
Well, Thomas and I traveled to Sacramento this weekend to celebrate the life of a recently passed on family friend. The funeral was on Saturday morning and we went with all of my family (Mom and Dad came out from Virginia, and both of my sisters live in Sacramento). It was such a wonderful celebration of his life that I only cried at a couple of moments. When his grandchildren carried roses up during the presentation of the gifts and at the reception during a slideshow of his life and when people made comments about how he had touched their lives.
It was also a wonderful time to spend with my sisters and parents and family. My brother-in-law's mother was in town also and we had a great time spending some time with her as well. It is so nice to be in a family where everyone gets along and loves each other so much.
Came home on Sunday afternoon. Sunday was Rob's birthday. He turned 38 this year. I can comfortably say how many years he has blessed us with his presence, because he stated last night that he does not care about that kind of stuff. Honestly, I really don't either about my age. Anyway, we went to dinner at The Old Spaghetti Factory in San Jose with friends Mark, Helen and their two boys Daniel and David. Well, we had finished dinner and had our cake for dessert (yes, I brought a cake) and were sitting around and somehow the topic of Matthew and Michelle's bio mom and step-dad came up. We were talking about how large their step-dad is and which car we had to use when picking them up for Michelle's birthday dinner the previous weekend, and Helen said at one point that it seemed like Matthew was "getting it" when it came to his mother's involvement in his life. At one point Mark asked if bio mom and step-dad were happy together. Matthew said, "what should be important is that she makes ME happy." I could not believe it. I know that teenagers are "all about me" but this seemed a bit ridiculous. I think he realizes that his mother should be more focused on him, but that she NEVER WILL BE. I feel really bad for him. Well, Mark then asked Matthew if he had a good time while his mother was visiting (they were here from December 13 until January 4). I think Matthew said yes, but when I looked over he had his head buried in his arm on the table and was crying.
Now, it has been 9 years since she moved to Michigan to be with this guy. You would think that he would have dealt with it by now, but since he is not in counseling and has not gotten a grip on his emotions or his feelings, we get behavior like this. I want so much to be able to give him the love that he is craving, but he does not want it from me. HE WANTS HIS MOMMY!! But, as much as I feel for Matthew, it is time to grow up and learn to deal with it!!! To me it was just ridiculous, and it makes me want to go to Michigan and put my hands around his mother's throat and make her realize what she is doing to her kids. While she was here, Matthew spent as much time as he could with her. Michelle, hardly any at all. She has written her mom off already, and that is really sad as well. Michelle has just dealt with this whole situation much more maturely since the beginning. Matthew has been protected, and coddled, and allowed to be a pain in the ass since his mother left. I, frankly, am tired of it. But, since I have no authority with him at all, I have to stand by and just try to ignore it as much as I can.
Anyway, Rob and I have our first Date Night tomorrow night. We are going to have a Date Night the second Tuesday of each month. We have a few gift certificates to different restaurants and I got him a gift card that is good to a bunch of different restaurants for his birthday, so who knows where we will go tomorrow night.
I hope everyone has a great week. Happy Monday!! Love and hugs.
It was also a wonderful time to spend with my sisters and parents and family. My brother-in-law's mother was in town also and we had a great time spending some time with her as well. It is so nice to be in a family where everyone gets along and loves each other so much.
Came home on Sunday afternoon. Sunday was Rob's birthday. He turned 38 this year. I can comfortably say how many years he has blessed us with his presence, because he stated last night that he does not care about that kind of stuff. Honestly, I really don't either about my age. Anyway, we went to dinner at The Old Spaghetti Factory in San Jose with friends Mark, Helen and their two boys Daniel and David. Well, we had finished dinner and had our cake for dessert (yes, I brought a cake) and were sitting around and somehow the topic of Matthew and Michelle's bio mom and step-dad came up. We were talking about how large their step-dad is and which car we had to use when picking them up for Michelle's birthday dinner the previous weekend, and Helen said at one point that it seemed like Matthew was "getting it" when it came to his mother's involvement in his life. At one point Mark asked if bio mom and step-dad were happy together. Matthew said, "what should be important is that she makes ME happy." I could not believe it. I know that teenagers are "all about me" but this seemed a bit ridiculous. I think he realizes that his mother should be more focused on him, but that she NEVER WILL BE. I feel really bad for him. Well, Mark then asked Matthew if he had a good time while his mother was visiting (they were here from December 13 until January 4). I think Matthew said yes, but when I looked over he had his head buried in his arm on the table and was crying.
Now, it has been 9 years since she moved to Michigan to be with this guy. You would think that he would have dealt with it by now, but since he is not in counseling and has not gotten a grip on his emotions or his feelings, we get behavior like this. I want so much to be able to give him the love that he is craving, but he does not want it from me. HE WANTS HIS MOMMY!! But, as much as I feel for Matthew, it is time to grow up and learn to deal with it!!! To me it was just ridiculous, and it makes me want to go to Michigan and put my hands around his mother's throat and make her realize what she is doing to her kids. While she was here, Matthew spent as much time as he could with her. Michelle, hardly any at all. She has written her mom off already, and that is really sad as well. Michelle has just dealt with this whole situation much more maturely since the beginning. Matthew has been protected, and coddled, and allowed to be a pain in the ass since his mother left. I, frankly, am tired of it. But, since I have no authority with him at all, I have to stand by and just try to ignore it as much as I can.
Anyway, Rob and I have our first Date Night tomorrow night. We are going to have a Date Night the second Tuesday of each month. We have a few gift certificates to different restaurants and I got him a gift card that is good to a bunch of different restaurants for his birthday, so who knows where we will go tomorrow night.
I hope everyone has a great week. Happy Monday!! Love and hugs.