fic advent, december 16 for hookedupforfun
Title: Unraveling
Rating: R for mentions of sex.
Pairing: Kevin/Addison
Summary: Busy's suicide ignites a reunion.
Addison sits in the corner of the room, staying out of the way of the many law enforcement officers, the coroners scouring the scene. Her eyebrow remained arched high on her forehead, too many thoughts racing through her mind to sort. The pearls her mother had left on the bedside table were being examined, along with the note that she’d left. Addison hears one of the officers mumble something about obtaining a handwriting sample from ‘the daughter’ and fury flows through her veins.
“Wait, you think I did this?” She asks incredulously, tears springing to her eyes, “You think I ki-“ she stops herself, wondering if she’s incriminating herself for something that she didn’t do.
Obviously she didn’t do it, there’s a bottle of pills- and the toxicology reports, it would clear her. But she knows that she can’t share this with anybody. She can’t tell a soul because it looks bad for the family. God forbid that Addison be able to tell anybody about how she was accused by the police of killing her own mother until they figured out that she swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills.
“Addison,” a voice addresses her from behind as she studies the scene with clenched fists.
“You can call me Dr. Mont-“ her voice falls short as she faces the man guilty of addressing her informally, “Kevin?” Her voice softens and the tears finally fall from her eyes.
He smiles sadly when she breaks, wants to wrap his arms around her but can’t because of appearances, “It’s protocol,” he offers in a quiet voice, “that’s all it is. We know what happened here. Addison- Addie, I’m so sorry.”
Addison wipes the tears from her eyes, clears her throat and straightens her posture, “I don’t want it released to the public. It was her final request.”
Kevin nods, “Of course. We obviously cannot cover up-“
“No, of course not. I simply don’t want it on the news.”
“No. I won’t let that happen,” his words are emphasized. He won’t let it happen. He will protect her.
“You’re not working SWAT anymore,” she says with an empty voice, looking anywhere but at him.
“Finally made detective,” he comments idly, eyes focused solely on her, “what can I do for you? Anything? Can I get you something?”
“I just want to get this over with so I can go home.”
“Alright,” he murmurs, “come with me. We’ll ask our questions so you can go.” His hand presses into the small of her back as he guides her from the room, and they both feel it. The connection they’ve always had.
The one that he walked away from.
It’s something he’s never been able to forgive himself for.
--
Sam’s incessant questioning and everybody else’s constant show of concern are starting to get to her. She doesn’t show it, of course. Busy wouldn’t have it any other way. She fingers the heavy pearls around her neck, looks at herself in the mirror and sees only her mother. A vessel of society, nothing but the best face forward and frivolous feelings tucked away even where Addison cannot find them.
The doorbell rings and she looks up at the clock in surprise.
Nobody is due to get in for at least another three hours as far as she knows.
Reluctantly, Addison goes to the door, fully expecting another flower delivery. The house is already full and people should know better than to send them to the house anyway- the obituary specifically requested donations be made to Busy’s favorite charity and that all flowers should be sent to the funeral home. It doesn’t mean that people don’t want to try to appear as if they truly cared about her.
When she pulls the door open, she finds Kevin standing before her, a single white Lily in hand an apologetic look on his face.
Addison’s brow furrows, “What are you doing here? How did you even-“
“Detective,” he offers smugly, before he motions to the interior of the house, “may I?”
“Oh. Y-yes,” she stammers slightly, “of course.”
Kevin steps inside, offers the Lily to her, “How are you holding up?”
“Is this standard follow up for the department, detective?” Addison asks coldly, ignoring his extension of the flower. She doesn’t want or need anything from him.
From anybody.
“Addison,”
“Detective Nelson,” she counters, “there’s no reason for you to be here.”
“And yet, here I am.”
“Why?” Her word is as tortured as the ending to their story, his inferiority complex getting in the way of their happiness. She doesn’t want to see him right now, he’s just another reminder of her failures, of her inability to live up to her mother’s expectations of her- expectations because Busy never hoped for anything.
She demanded it.
“I wanted to be here for you,” his words are simple but they hold so much meaning.
“Until you see Archer and he reminds you that you’re not from money?” She presses, tries to push him away with the same cold reality that he used to end their relationship in the first place, “That you’re not good enough to be here.”
“I know you don’t believe that, and I never should have,” Kevin mumbles, studying her, “but that’s not why I’m here right now. I’m here because you need somebody. I’m here because I never should have left. And I’m here because I am the only person who knows the truth and you need that right now. You need somebody that knows.”
Addison doesn’t want to let him in, doesn’t want him to see the tiny crack forming in her façade but his words slip through that crack and she starts to buckle. She inhales sharply, tries to hold onto that air as if it’s the last left in the room, but she can’t. Her head shakes and tears well in the blue eyes that he loves so much and she looks away, “I can’t do this right now. I can’t. You can’t be here.”
Kevin stops her, wraps his arms around her tightly, “This is where I belong,” he whispers in her ear, “it’s where I need to be. I’m not going anywhere.”
He’ll do whatever he has to in order to make her believe those words.
--
“You didn’t have to do that,” Addison hisses, sliding a jacket on to cover the reddened streaks on her arms.
“He was shaking you. I had to do something.”
“He wasn’t shaking me. He was just, he-“ she didn’t have any explanation for exactly what Sam was doing. Besides trying to get out of her the true story, what really happened to her mother. Too lost in going through the motions, she’d gotten sloppy with her stories and it was her fault that he could poke holes in them, it wasn’t Sam, it was that she-
“Addison,” Kevin says softly, reaches out, slides his hand up her arm, “he was hurting you. And there is no good reason for that.”
She doesn’t say it, but she’s so used to hurting now that she’s forgotten what else there is except pain.
--
Her back hits the wall and she stifles a gasp by biting his lip. He hurts in a way that nothing else has, in a way that she couldn’t ever get enough of. His hips are driving into hers with reckless abandon and the picture next to her head rattles slightly with each powerful thrust. Addison’s rests her forehead against his shoulder, scrapes her nails along his back.
Sam is two rooms down and if he opened the unlocked door there would be explanations to be made.
Yet somehow, she doesn’t care.
She’s starting to believe that she never has.
--
“I want to go home with you,” Kevin whispers into her ear, wraps an arm tighter around her as if the words will scare her away.
“I have somebody else to go home with,” she whispers back. Her words are as empty as she feels.
A smug grin tugs at the corner of Kevin’s mouth. He knows that Sam will not be an issue if he has anything to say about it. He’s already threatened the man with domestic violence charges if he doesn’t give Addison the space she needs right now.
He may just file them if she doesn’t get rid of the man herself.
Jurisdiction won’t stop him.
“You didn’t want this,” she finally says, sensing that her initial excuse isn’t enough for Kevin.
“I want you, Addison. I don’t deserve you. Not because of money or backgrounds or careers, but because I walked away from you. But I do want you,” every word resounds inside her despite the fact that they’re said in no more than a whisper.
“You want me,” she repeats softly.
“All of you, for better or for worse. And we’ve already had worse.”
“And you left.”
Kevin tightens his grip around her, “Then let me stick around for better.”
--
“I want a baby,” her voice wavers slightly as the words fall out. It’s the first time she’s really said anything about it since her mother died, since they got home.
But she’s never stopped thinking about it.
His eyes trail up to hers and there’s question there for a moment, she knows that she’s caught him off guard, but then his gaze softens a little, “You want a baby?”
She nods slightly, averts his gaze, “It’s something I’ve wanted for a long time. And if it’s not something- I know that you’re not- I just, it’s what I want. I need to be a mother, Kevin. And I don’t expect you to stick around for that. I want you to-“
“Wait, wait,” he says, setting his book aside and crossing the room to join her, “who said that I didn’t want to stick around for that?”
“I just know that we’re still- new. Again.”
“I’m not going anywhere. For better or for worse. And I meant it.”
Addison smiles, wraps her arms around his neck, “You mean it,” she murmurs before kissing him gently. She feels again, not numb or like she’s walking on eggshells in her own relationship. She’s happy. She’s genuinely happy, and she hopes. There’s still trepidation, he’s left once before, but every day she tests his boundaries in another way, and the next morning he’s always there.
Kevin breaks the kiss for just a moment, his hands still wandering up the back of her shirt, “So a baby?”
His hands on her flesh causes her to shiver slightly and she pushes him back towards the couch, “Later,” she murmurs, pressing her lips to his again.
He smiles against her lips and shifts so that she’s beneath him, “Maybe twins,” he offers, grinding his hips against hers, “I’m willing to work very hard to make sure you get everything you want.”
She pulls her shirt off and drops it onto the floor, looking up to him with darkened eyes, “Prove it.”
With that he bends and kisses her deeply. They’re happy now, together as they should have been all along. He’ll spend the rest of his life proving to her how sorry he is for walking away from her, even if she’s told him that he’s already forgiven.
Addison deserves nothing less.
Rating: R for mentions of sex.
Pairing: Kevin/Addison
Summary: Busy's suicide ignites a reunion.
Addison sits in the corner of the room, staying out of the way of the many law enforcement officers, the coroners scouring the scene. Her eyebrow remained arched high on her forehead, too many thoughts racing through her mind to sort. The pearls her mother had left on the bedside table were being examined, along with the note that she’d left. Addison hears one of the officers mumble something about obtaining a handwriting sample from ‘the daughter’ and fury flows through her veins.
“Wait, you think I did this?” She asks incredulously, tears springing to her eyes, “You think I ki-“ she stops herself, wondering if she’s incriminating herself for something that she didn’t do.
Obviously she didn’t do it, there’s a bottle of pills- and the toxicology reports, it would clear her. But she knows that she can’t share this with anybody. She can’t tell a soul because it looks bad for the family. God forbid that Addison be able to tell anybody about how she was accused by the police of killing her own mother until they figured out that she swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills.
“Addison,” a voice addresses her from behind as she studies the scene with clenched fists.
“You can call me Dr. Mont-“ her voice falls short as she faces the man guilty of addressing her informally, “Kevin?” Her voice softens and the tears finally fall from her eyes.
He smiles sadly when she breaks, wants to wrap his arms around her but can’t because of appearances, “It’s protocol,” he offers in a quiet voice, “that’s all it is. We know what happened here. Addison- Addie, I’m so sorry.”
Addison wipes the tears from her eyes, clears her throat and straightens her posture, “I don’t want it released to the public. It was her final request.”
Kevin nods, “Of course. We obviously cannot cover up-“
“No, of course not. I simply don’t want it on the news.”
“No. I won’t let that happen,” his words are emphasized. He won’t let it happen. He will protect her.
“You’re not working SWAT anymore,” she says with an empty voice, looking anywhere but at him.
“Finally made detective,” he comments idly, eyes focused solely on her, “what can I do for you? Anything? Can I get you something?”
“I just want to get this over with so I can go home.”
“Alright,” he murmurs, “come with me. We’ll ask our questions so you can go.” His hand presses into the small of her back as he guides her from the room, and they both feel it. The connection they’ve always had.
The one that he walked away from.
It’s something he’s never been able to forgive himself for.
--
Sam’s incessant questioning and everybody else’s constant show of concern are starting to get to her. She doesn’t show it, of course. Busy wouldn’t have it any other way. She fingers the heavy pearls around her neck, looks at herself in the mirror and sees only her mother. A vessel of society, nothing but the best face forward and frivolous feelings tucked away even where Addison cannot find them.
The doorbell rings and she looks up at the clock in surprise.
Nobody is due to get in for at least another three hours as far as she knows.
Reluctantly, Addison goes to the door, fully expecting another flower delivery. The house is already full and people should know better than to send them to the house anyway- the obituary specifically requested donations be made to Busy’s favorite charity and that all flowers should be sent to the funeral home. It doesn’t mean that people don’t want to try to appear as if they truly cared about her.
When she pulls the door open, she finds Kevin standing before her, a single white Lily in hand an apologetic look on his face.
Addison’s brow furrows, “What are you doing here? How did you even-“
“Detective,” he offers smugly, before he motions to the interior of the house, “may I?”
“Oh. Y-yes,” she stammers slightly, “of course.”
Kevin steps inside, offers the Lily to her, “How are you holding up?”
“Is this standard follow up for the department, detective?” Addison asks coldly, ignoring his extension of the flower. She doesn’t want or need anything from him.
From anybody.
“Addison,”
“Detective Nelson,” she counters, “there’s no reason for you to be here.”
“And yet, here I am.”
“Why?” Her word is as tortured as the ending to their story, his inferiority complex getting in the way of their happiness. She doesn’t want to see him right now, he’s just another reminder of her failures, of her inability to live up to her mother’s expectations of her- expectations because Busy never hoped for anything.
She demanded it.
“I wanted to be here for you,” his words are simple but they hold so much meaning.
“Until you see Archer and he reminds you that you’re not from money?” She presses, tries to push him away with the same cold reality that he used to end their relationship in the first place, “That you’re not good enough to be here.”
“I know you don’t believe that, and I never should have,” Kevin mumbles, studying her, “but that’s not why I’m here right now. I’m here because you need somebody. I’m here because I never should have left. And I’m here because I am the only person who knows the truth and you need that right now. You need somebody that knows.”
Addison doesn’t want to let him in, doesn’t want him to see the tiny crack forming in her façade but his words slip through that crack and she starts to buckle. She inhales sharply, tries to hold onto that air as if it’s the last left in the room, but she can’t. Her head shakes and tears well in the blue eyes that he loves so much and she looks away, “I can’t do this right now. I can’t. You can’t be here.”
Kevin stops her, wraps his arms around her tightly, “This is where I belong,” he whispers in her ear, “it’s where I need to be. I’m not going anywhere.”
He’ll do whatever he has to in order to make her believe those words.
--
“You didn’t have to do that,” Addison hisses, sliding a jacket on to cover the reddened streaks on her arms.
“He was shaking you. I had to do something.”
“He wasn’t shaking me. He was just, he-“ she didn’t have any explanation for exactly what Sam was doing. Besides trying to get out of her the true story, what really happened to her mother. Too lost in going through the motions, she’d gotten sloppy with her stories and it was her fault that he could poke holes in them, it wasn’t Sam, it was that she-
“Addison,” Kevin says softly, reaches out, slides his hand up her arm, “he was hurting you. And there is no good reason for that.”
She doesn’t say it, but she’s so used to hurting now that she’s forgotten what else there is except pain.
--
Her back hits the wall and she stifles a gasp by biting his lip. He hurts in a way that nothing else has, in a way that she couldn’t ever get enough of. His hips are driving into hers with reckless abandon and the picture next to her head rattles slightly with each powerful thrust. Addison’s rests her forehead against his shoulder, scrapes her nails along his back.
Sam is two rooms down and if he opened the unlocked door there would be explanations to be made.
Yet somehow, she doesn’t care.
She’s starting to believe that she never has.
--
“I want to go home with you,” Kevin whispers into her ear, wraps an arm tighter around her as if the words will scare her away.
“I have somebody else to go home with,” she whispers back. Her words are as empty as she feels.
A smug grin tugs at the corner of Kevin’s mouth. He knows that Sam will not be an issue if he has anything to say about it. He’s already threatened the man with domestic violence charges if he doesn’t give Addison the space she needs right now.
He may just file them if she doesn’t get rid of the man herself.
Jurisdiction won’t stop him.
“You didn’t want this,” she finally says, sensing that her initial excuse isn’t enough for Kevin.
“I want you, Addison. I don’t deserve you. Not because of money or backgrounds or careers, but because I walked away from you. But I do want you,” every word resounds inside her despite the fact that they’re said in no more than a whisper.
“You want me,” she repeats softly.
“All of you, for better or for worse. And we’ve already had worse.”
“And you left.”
Kevin tightens his grip around her, “Then let me stick around for better.”
--
“I want a baby,” her voice wavers slightly as the words fall out. It’s the first time she’s really said anything about it since her mother died, since they got home.
But she’s never stopped thinking about it.
His eyes trail up to hers and there’s question there for a moment, she knows that she’s caught him off guard, but then his gaze softens a little, “You want a baby?”
She nods slightly, averts his gaze, “It’s something I’ve wanted for a long time. And if it’s not something- I know that you’re not- I just, it’s what I want. I need to be a mother, Kevin. And I don’t expect you to stick around for that. I want you to-“
“Wait, wait,” he says, setting his book aside and crossing the room to join her, “who said that I didn’t want to stick around for that?”
“I just know that we’re still- new. Again.”
“I’m not going anywhere. For better or for worse. And I meant it.”
Addison smiles, wraps her arms around his neck, “You mean it,” she murmurs before kissing him gently. She feels again, not numb or like she’s walking on eggshells in her own relationship. She’s happy. She’s genuinely happy, and she hopes. There’s still trepidation, he’s left once before, but every day she tests his boundaries in another way, and the next morning he’s always there.
Kevin breaks the kiss for just a moment, his hands still wandering up the back of her shirt, “So a baby?”
His hands on her flesh causes her to shiver slightly and she pushes him back towards the couch, “Later,” she murmurs, pressing her lips to his again.
He smiles against her lips and shifts so that she’s beneath him, “Maybe twins,” he offers, grinding his hips against hers, “I’m willing to work very hard to make sure you get everything you want.”
She pulls her shirt off and drops it onto the floor, looking up to him with darkened eyes, “Prove it.”
With that he bends and kisses her deeply. They’re happy now, together as they should have been all along. He’ll spend the rest of his life proving to her how sorry he is for walking away from her, even if she’s told him that he’s already forgiven.
Addison deserves nothing less.