sekaijyuu wo teki ni shitemo, kimi wo mamoru yo.
★ Got kidnapped by Dad to go practice driving this afternoon, which invariably turned into one of those 'what are you doing with your life'/'stop being a slacker' talks.
In March, I turn nineteen, and after that, I'll be off my mother's insurance. Clearly, we Can't Have That Happen, so I have a few choices. I can A) join the military before March, B) get my license and a job that will cover my insurance before March, or C) enroll in classes at the local community college in the next nine days.
Well, clearly, I am not A) joining the fucking military, because that requires things like discipline, drive, commitment, motivation, and so on, none of which I can conscientiously claim to possess. I am also not keen on B) getting a job before March, because I wouldn't have much of a choice between fast food and retail, and no. That leaves C) going back to school, which honestly wouldn't be such a big deal if he weren't insisting that I enroll before the new semester, which is in - yes - nine days.
I really wouldn't be so averse to going back to school. I realize that in order to move forward and get out of here, I need to pull the Fish from the Bull and work with what I've got, instead of resisting. That means going out and doing things sometimes, playing nice with the locals and even shaking things up a little. That might mean going back to school. Okay.
But I'm not comfortable with learning how to drive in the next two weeks to a month, considering today was my first practice. Granted, I did well today, but I am not comfortable with rushing into this. Without my license, I have no way of getting to classes - buses don't run to our house, and both my parents work, so if they took me to classes, I'd have to be on campus all day (6:30 am - 4:30 pm) for what would probably be two or three classes.
I am also 95% certain that I cannot meet the requirements for enrollment in nine days. I need my GED transcript (which is probably lost, considering my parents' history of losing important fucking documents two weeks before we need them), immunization records (see 'GED transcript' and 'why I won't have it'), ACT or SAT scores less than five years old (do I even have those at all?) and the admission application, and I don't even know which classes I want to take.
If he hadn't flung this all at me at once - granted, I knew I'd be off her insurance come March, but they never pressed the issue until today, all at once - I'd be much more amenable to cooperating. As it stands, I am not comfortable with leaping into this headfirst the way he wants me to. It's nice that he has confidence in me; he thinks I can learn to drive in a month, he thinks I could join the military, he thinks I can do anything, and I'm not joking. I love him for that, and I believe that I could succeed at a lot of those things, but I'm not comfortable jumping in like this, and I wish he'd listen when I tell him that.
If anything, I'd like to take online classes, or wait until the summer courses start at the college, so I'd be okay driving myself there (and might have, you know, a car). But hell, I don't even know where the money for any of this is coming from. Our bank balance has been $500 - $1500 for months and months now.
Hell.
★ On a much lighter note, I finished the Kajimoto app for XP and posted it. ☆ He's quite lively, and a little different from the AU!Kaji muse that already existed; less gay, more friendly, less elitist, more rebellious. To boot, I think he's only met Ayaka, as opposed to the entire Extended Family from the Twilight Zone that AU!Kaji sees every holiday season. Not sure what that means, but hey.
★ Zaiger is awake, thanks to some combination of his own storyline, his apparent attachment to Jen, and his buchou (♥♥). He's telling me about his bedroom, so I think that's a sign that I need to interview him already. :D Yay.
★ Entirely conversely, Keigo is being vague and slippery and strange, and I'm not feeling very comfortable with him right now. ;; If I can't straighten him out, I won't be picking him up at CD, after all. I'll find someone else, though, because I Cannot just play Eishirou (who's vague and slippery, himself, but that's just Eishirou, and I'm learning). He's not nearly friendly enough; I'll end up beating my head against things, because he won't play with anyone outside of Higa.
And on the above note, *boxes Zaiger and drags him off to the interview room.*
In March, I turn nineteen, and after that, I'll be off my mother's insurance. Clearly, we Can't Have That Happen, so I have a few choices. I can A) join the military before March, B) get my license and a job that will cover my insurance before March, or C) enroll in classes at the local community college in the next nine days.
Well, clearly, I am not A) joining the fucking military, because that requires things like discipline, drive, commitment, motivation, and so on, none of which I can conscientiously claim to possess. I am also not keen on B) getting a job before March, because I wouldn't have much of a choice between fast food and retail, and no. That leaves C) going back to school, which honestly wouldn't be such a big deal if he weren't insisting that I enroll before the new semester, which is in - yes - nine days.
I really wouldn't be so averse to going back to school. I realize that in order to move forward and get out of here, I need to pull the Fish from the Bull and work with what I've got, instead of resisting. That means going out and doing things sometimes, playing nice with the locals and even shaking things up a little. That might mean going back to school. Okay.
But I'm not comfortable with learning how to drive in the next two weeks to a month, considering today was my first practice. Granted, I did well today, but I am not comfortable with rushing into this. Without my license, I have no way of getting to classes - buses don't run to our house, and both my parents work, so if they took me to classes, I'd have to be on campus all day (6:30 am - 4:30 pm) for what would probably be two or three classes.
I am also 95% certain that I cannot meet the requirements for enrollment in nine days. I need my GED transcript (which is probably lost, considering my parents' history of losing important fucking documents two weeks before we need them), immunization records (see 'GED transcript' and 'why I won't have it'), ACT or SAT scores less than five years old (do I even have those at all?) and the admission application, and I don't even know which classes I want to take.
If he hadn't flung this all at me at once - granted, I knew I'd be off her insurance come March, but they never pressed the issue until today, all at once - I'd be much more amenable to cooperating. As it stands, I am not comfortable with leaping into this headfirst the way he wants me to. It's nice that he has confidence in me; he thinks I can learn to drive in a month, he thinks I could join the military, he thinks I can do anything, and I'm not joking. I love him for that, and I believe that I could succeed at a lot of those things, but I'm not comfortable jumping in like this, and I wish he'd listen when I tell him that.
If anything, I'd like to take online classes, or wait until the summer courses start at the college, so I'd be okay driving myself there (and might have, you know, a car). But hell, I don't even know where the money for any of this is coming from. Our bank balance has been $500 - $1500 for months and months now.
Hell.
★ On a much lighter note, I finished the Kajimoto app for XP and posted it. ☆ He's quite lively, and a little different from the AU!Kaji muse that already existed; less gay, more friendly, less elitist, more rebellious. To boot, I think he's only met Ayaka, as opposed to the entire Extended Family from the Twilight Zone that AU!Kaji sees every holiday season. Not sure what that means, but hey.
★ Zaiger is awake, thanks to some combination of his own storyline, his apparent attachment to Jen, and his buchou (♥♥). He's telling me about his bedroom, so I think that's a sign that I need to interview him already. :D Yay.
★ Entirely conversely, Keigo is being vague and slippery and strange, and I'm not feeling very comfortable with him right now. ;; If I can't straighten him out, I won't be picking him up at CD, after all. I'll find someone else, though, because I Cannot just play Eishirou (who's vague and slippery, himself, but that's just Eishirou, and I'm learning). He's not nearly friendly enough; I'll end up beating my head against things, because he won't play with anyone outside of Higa.
And on the above note, *boxes Zaiger and drags him off to the interview room.*