She's long gone with her red shoes on.
In seven long months I will be holding a new baby in my arms. And I don't think it's really hit me yet, I know I'm pregnant and I know I'm going to have a baby and I mean it's fine right now because these no new born sitting here crying needing to be feed every 2-3 hours. That's why I don't think it's hit me in all the ways it needs to hit me. For almost 2 weeks straight since I found out I haven't got it off my mind of WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO DO? I can't get that question out of my mind. And to be honest I'm fucking scared shitless because I have a 2 year old running around right now that dosen't listen to a single word I say to him, it's like I'm not even here. I'm sick day in and day out and I really don't know how I'm going to handle a new baby not even being able to handle my two year old and already thinking I'm so tired of being a mom but I mean this is just the beginning and that really scares me. I never thought I'd be a mother of two at nineteen I really didn't. This isn't like the life I wanted, or need right now. I'm dying to get outta the house right now with just one kid and I can't even get outta the house ever, how is it going to be with two kids, And kevins barley ever home and if he is, it seems like he's not. Blah I thought I had alot of say about this but all I'm doing is letting my cig burn away and I'm just.. lost I don't know what to do, or how I'm going to do it, ksgnpet