30 Day meme (07)
30 Day meme
Day 01 - Introduce yourself
Day 02 - Your first love, in great detail
Day 03 - Your parents, in great detail
Day 04 - What you ate today, in great detail
Day 05 - Your definition of love, in great detail
Day 06 - Your day, in great detail
Day 07 - Your best friend, in great detail
Day 08 - A moment, in great detail
Day 09 - Your beliefs, in great detail
Day 10 - What you wore today, in great detail
Day 11 - Your siblings, in great detail
Day 12 - What’s in your bag, in great detail
Day 13 - This week, in great detail
Day 14 - What you wore today, in great detail
Day 15 - Your dreams, in great detail
Day 16 - Your first kiss, in great detail
Day 17 - Your favorite memory, in great detail
Day 18 - Your favorite birthday, in great detail
Day 19 - Something you regret, in great detail
Day 20 - This month, in great detail
Day 21 - Another moment, in great detail
Day 22 - Something that upsets you, in great detail
Day 23 - Something that makes you feel better, in great detail
Day 24 - Something that makes you cry, in great detail
Day 25 - A first, in great detail
Day 26 - Your fears, in great detail
Day 27 - Your favorite place, in great detail
Day 28 - Something that you miss, in great detail
Day 29 - Your aspirations, in great detail
Day 30 - One last moment, in great detail
MY best friend.
My best friends have changed over the years. When I was in middle school, it was Olivia. We were best friends from birth, as we were only two months or so apart. We grew up together. In high school, we grew apart suddenly and drastically. Now we don't talk to each other at all. I know I love her, but I resent her. I resent everything about her. I also had a friend in high school named Heather. I grew apart from her the same time I did Olivia. Her's was a more slow and subtle estrangement. We don't talk anymore either.
My best friend now (and I'll call him that even though I hate the idea of grading acquaintances) is Andy. He's a little taller than me (I'm 5'6"), short black hair, scruffy, and I wouldn't say he's muscular, but he works out. He usually wears button up shirts now that he's started working in more respectable places. He has a chipped front tooth from a skateboarding accident and sometimes he stutters and sometimes he has a lisp. But they're intermittent.
We started out in high school sometimes around Junior or Senior year. In junior year, I got angry at him because he wouldn't leave me alone, which turned into fury because he really wouldn't leave me alone. He was a sponge. He absorbed my likes and dislikes and style and fashion sense and adopted it. He started to like Daft Punk, FLCL, anime shirts, black nail polish, etc. etc. It seemed any time I told him I liked something, he would come to school the next day with merchandise. It was irritating. And when I asked him to just leave me alone for a little while, he refused. Instead, he dragged his friends to my lunch table and talked loudly. This was when he was 16 or something.
After a year passed or so without us talking to each other, we were walking home. He would go to his aunt's house which was further up the street from my house and he would always run to get in front of me so that I would be walking behind him and him ahead of me. No matter what time I left. He would always be across the street talking with someone and laughing really loud and then he would take off running so he would make it in front of me before I turned up my street. And then towards the tail end of Senior year, it started raining so I took off my glasses so I wouldn't have to look through rain drops. There was this dog at the end of the street who was always outside and would always bark. It started barking at Andy and when I walked past, I made a face at it and started laughing to myself. Andy came back and we started talking. We found out later that Andy had thought I was laughing at him because the dog had scared him, but I hadn't been paying attention and I'd been half blind, so I had no idea. He had decided it was now or never and gone back and talked to me and we became friends again through a misunderstanding.
So since then it's been about... four or so years. Unfortunately, even though it was really good at one point and I enjoyed being with him, now our relationship is tenuous. I spend most days wondering whether he's drinking with Jake or smoking weed with Jared and why I never hear from him anymore. When my period comes around and I'm hormonal, I cry thinking about it. And then after I'm fine with it. And then I'm not again. I get upset when I read on facebook he's been hanging out with other people because he can never seen to remember when he's made plans with me, even if it's just the day before or that morning. I do enjoy his company and out of everyone he's the only person who I've told things that I regret and all of my issues to, but I feel like he's enjoying the ephemeral freedoms of drugs too much. I don't know how often he smokes weed, but I know he lies when he says it's only once or twice a week. I know that's a lie. I know when he goes to Jake's, he drinks. I know when he goes to Jared's or hangs out with Brandon, he smokes. I know if it's not one, it's the other. And he's told me that what happened with Olivia (which, in short, was that I was left behind and used so that she could do drugs and if I didn't do drugs or have any, I was of no use to her) won't happen between us, but I think he's lying. I think half of the things he says no aren't true, but he's just trying to make me feel better over something that he perceives I'm upset about.
And then again I could be thinking about all of this too much. I'm possessive of him, I know that. I think of him as a stupid child sometimes who needs their hand held through life, who needs a mother's guidance. And other times I think he's got it more together than I do. That maybe he indulges a little too much, but he is setting himself up for a life later on.
Day 01 - Introduce yourself
Day 02 - Your first love, in great detail
Day 03 - Your parents, in great detail
Day 04 - What you ate today, in great detail
Day 05 - Your definition of love, in great detail
Day 06 - Your day, in great detail
Day 07 - Your best friend, in great detail
Day 08 - A moment, in great detail
Day 09 - Your beliefs, in great detail
Day 10 - What you wore today, in great detail
Day 11 - Your siblings, in great detail
Day 12 - What’s in your bag, in great detail
Day 13 - This week, in great detail
Day 14 - What you wore today, in great detail
Day 15 - Your dreams, in great detail
Day 16 - Your first kiss, in great detail
Day 17 - Your favorite memory, in great detail
Day 18 - Your favorite birthday, in great detail
Day 19 - Something you regret, in great detail
Day 20 - This month, in great detail
Day 21 - Another moment, in great detail
Day 22 - Something that upsets you, in great detail
Day 23 - Something that makes you feel better, in great detail
Day 24 - Something that makes you cry, in great detail
Day 25 - A first, in great detail
Day 26 - Your fears, in great detail
Day 27 - Your favorite place, in great detail
Day 28 - Something that you miss, in great detail
Day 29 - Your aspirations, in great detail
Day 30 - One last moment, in great detail
MY best friend.
My best friends have changed over the years. When I was in middle school, it was Olivia. We were best friends from birth, as we were only two months or so apart. We grew up together. In high school, we grew apart suddenly and drastically. Now we don't talk to each other at all. I know I love her, but I resent her. I resent everything about her. I also had a friend in high school named Heather. I grew apart from her the same time I did Olivia. Her's was a more slow and subtle estrangement. We don't talk anymore either.
My best friend now (and I'll call him that even though I hate the idea of grading acquaintances) is Andy. He's a little taller than me (I'm 5'6"), short black hair, scruffy, and I wouldn't say he's muscular, but he works out. He usually wears button up shirts now that he's started working in more respectable places. He has a chipped front tooth from a skateboarding accident and sometimes he stutters and sometimes he has a lisp. But they're intermittent.
We started out in high school sometimes around Junior or Senior year. In junior year, I got angry at him because he wouldn't leave me alone, which turned into fury because he really wouldn't leave me alone. He was a sponge. He absorbed my likes and dislikes and style and fashion sense and adopted it. He started to like Daft Punk, FLCL, anime shirts, black nail polish, etc. etc. It seemed any time I told him I liked something, he would come to school the next day with merchandise. It was irritating. And when I asked him to just leave me alone for a little while, he refused. Instead, he dragged his friends to my lunch table and talked loudly. This was when he was 16 or something.
After a year passed or so without us talking to each other, we were walking home. He would go to his aunt's house which was further up the street from my house and he would always run to get in front of me so that I would be walking behind him and him ahead of me. No matter what time I left. He would always be across the street talking with someone and laughing really loud and then he would take off running so he would make it in front of me before I turned up my street. And then towards the tail end of Senior year, it started raining so I took off my glasses so I wouldn't have to look through rain drops. There was this dog at the end of the street who was always outside and would always bark. It started barking at Andy and when I walked past, I made a face at it and started laughing to myself. Andy came back and we started talking. We found out later that Andy had thought I was laughing at him because the dog had scared him, but I hadn't been paying attention and I'd been half blind, so I had no idea. He had decided it was now or never and gone back and talked to me and we became friends again through a misunderstanding.
So since then it's been about... four or so years. Unfortunately, even though it was really good at one point and I enjoyed being with him, now our relationship is tenuous. I spend most days wondering whether he's drinking with Jake or smoking weed with Jared and why I never hear from him anymore. When my period comes around and I'm hormonal, I cry thinking about it. And then after I'm fine with it. And then I'm not again. I get upset when I read on facebook he's been hanging out with other people because he can never seen to remember when he's made plans with me, even if it's just the day before or that morning. I do enjoy his company and out of everyone he's the only person who I've told things that I regret and all of my issues to, but I feel like he's enjoying the ephemeral freedoms of drugs too much. I don't know how often he smokes weed, but I know he lies when he says it's only once or twice a week. I know that's a lie. I know when he goes to Jake's, he drinks. I know when he goes to Jared's or hangs out with Brandon, he smokes. I know if it's not one, it's the other. And he's told me that what happened with Olivia (which, in short, was that I was left behind and used so that she could do drugs and if I didn't do drugs or have any, I was of no use to her) won't happen between us, but I think he's lying. I think half of the things he says no aren't true, but he's just trying to make me feel better over something that he perceives I'm upset about.
And then again I could be thinking about all of this too much. I'm possessive of him, I know that. I think of him as a stupid child sometimes who needs their hand held through life, who needs a mother's guidance. And other times I think he's got it more together than I do. That maybe he indulges a little too much, but he is setting himself up for a life later on.