hit with the "future"?
I hope not. If this is the future, it has hit me like a sack of bricks...and has yet to even come close to the reality. I'm feeling the same lonelyness i have so many times before here at home away from my friends, but it is different. Now i have not only legal restrictions from myself being me, but emotional forces keeping me away.
The other day i had a realization that has sent me into a 2day binge of senselessness. Had a friend i rarely talk to, but whenever i am around we are cool, i.m. me with news of a weekend of reunion, and she wanted me to come. This weekend is the same weekend i was told not to come to only 24hrs before, shockingly to myself, but i understood why. Now i have people asking me to come and i have to say otherwise, so i can preserve some sort of future.
...can't even get into this right now, already getting wayy to emotional. I need to get up tomorrow and go on with life and i won't be able to with this in my dreams. goodnight.
The other day i had a realization that has sent me into a 2day binge of senselessness. Had a friend i rarely talk to, but whenever i am around we are cool, i.m. me with news of a weekend of reunion, and she wanted me to come. This weekend is the same weekend i was told not to come to only 24hrs before, shockingly to myself, but i understood why. Now i have people asking me to come and i have to say otherwise, so i can preserve some sort of future.
...can't even get into this right now, already getting wayy to emotional. I need to get up tomorrow and go on with life and i won't be able to with this in my dreams. goodnight.