I said brother, ya know ya know its a long road weve been walking on
you know the one thing in the whole world that has sure enough ever made me feel safe and peaceful?
at night, or at least tonight, just now, I heard the train go by. The simple toot of the horn and the clatter of the wheels that move it along. Now I have no idea where the closest tracks are to my house but hearing that train in the middle of the night has always given me some kind of comfort.
I remember always picturing myself someday in the summer...going to walk along those tracks as the train rolls by me gusting the wind and just carrying every worry I had away. then for the rest of the day i would follow those tracks in the sunlight until I reached whatever happiness was on the end. You know in the movies how the main character is just in the best mood ever and it is only showed and described by them stretching out their arms that are in the sleeves of their most comfortable red sweatshirt, lookin straight up into the sun, and closing their eyes and just smiling with the best music in the world playing behind. that is what that small sound of the train does to me every night I hear it.
Today was Joe Bergerons funeral. I didnt know him well but I still felt numb. I think most people felt like they had to pretend and care because someone died. I dont feel bad for Joe. I feel bad for his family. His real friends. Losing someone is never easy. But Joes death made me think more about me than him. Maybe that selfish. But he made me look around at the people around me and think " What does this person mean to me? If I died today, would their care be fake or would they really miss me? " I wouldnt want people to be sad when I died and I sure as hell wouldnt want someone to fake like they actually cared.
I kinda just wanted to put my hand on Justins shoulder and just tell him that no matter what, he has always been the best friend I could have asked for. And I wanted to tell Meg that I loved her so much. But I couldnt. I didnt even wanna talk. Or think. Just close my eyes and pretend like nothing was happening around me.
One day when I am home during the summer. I am going to go find those train tracks and I am going to spend the day walking along them to wherever it takes me. And I am gonna smile, close my eyes, and look up at the sky. I think somehow...it will change me.
I had a dream I lived beneath and orange sky.....
at night, or at least tonight, just now, I heard the train go by. The simple toot of the horn and the clatter of the wheels that move it along. Now I have no idea where the closest tracks are to my house but hearing that train in the middle of the night has always given me some kind of comfort.
I remember always picturing myself someday in the summer...going to walk along those tracks as the train rolls by me gusting the wind and just carrying every worry I had away. then for the rest of the day i would follow those tracks in the sunlight until I reached whatever happiness was on the end. You know in the movies how the main character is just in the best mood ever and it is only showed and described by them stretching out their arms that are in the sleeves of their most comfortable red sweatshirt, lookin straight up into the sun, and closing their eyes and just smiling with the best music in the world playing behind. that is what that small sound of the train does to me every night I hear it.
Today was Joe Bergerons funeral. I didnt know him well but I still felt numb. I think most people felt like they had to pretend and care because someone died. I dont feel bad for Joe. I feel bad for his family. His real friends. Losing someone is never easy. But Joes death made me think more about me than him. Maybe that selfish. But he made me look around at the people around me and think " What does this person mean to me? If I died today, would their care be fake or would they really miss me? " I wouldnt want people to be sad when I died and I sure as hell wouldnt want someone to fake like they actually cared.
I kinda just wanted to put my hand on Justins shoulder and just tell him that no matter what, he has always been the best friend I could have asked for. And I wanted to tell Meg that I loved her so much. But I couldnt. I didnt even wanna talk. Or think. Just close my eyes and pretend like nothing was happening around me.
One day when I am home during the summer. I am going to go find those train tracks and I am going to spend the day walking along them to wherever it takes me. And I am gonna smile, close my eyes, and look up at the sky. I think somehow...it will change me.
I had a dream I lived beneath and orange sky.....