The beginning of the end.
Oh this break. Insane really. Saw some randoms, missed out on some normals. Overall? It was one of the best breaks I've had. Cosmic bowling, guitar hero, the boat, downtown, house parties, tallahassee folk coming down to play. I just wish that Tally wasn't so far from the rest of the world. 4 hours, seriously, puts a damper on the whole thing. I was supposed to leave today but I was, you guessed it, hung over. It's wierd, I go all semester wasted and shit housed with only 3 or 4 really bad hang overs but last night I partied a little too hard. The sun came up as I shut my eyes. So I only did 3 of the only 5 chores my Dad set aside for me to do while I was here and I have to finish the other two tomorrow. I'm such a waste of space. But in my little space wasted I've been doing some thinking. Shocking I know.
New years resolutions are boring and tired. I could lose weight...I could stop smoking. But cliche isn't really my thing. I'd like to do more for my life than just minor fix ups that will only last a mere 2 months tops. I've decided to make my resolutions my own and not the rest of the populations. In one year I'd like to accomplish...drum roll if you'd like...
1.) Be kinder to my parents...It's a little tiring to always bicker with them. They gave me life and a good one at that and I really do take all they do for granted. My mom misses me a lot and I'm such a bitch that I cry when I find out that I might be stuck with her for another week, It's not her though, it's colorado but still, my mom should be way more important to me than some parties in orlando. Case closed, Mom and Dad...I love you with all my heart really...and though family ties have not exactly been knotted by a boy scout they are still important to me.
2.) Stop drinking and driving. I know it's really bad and I've been lucky the past two times and thank god that I didn't get another one or worse, into an accident. It's not safe. I should try and stop drinking but I know that wont happen. Sometimes I consider asking my parents to send me to rehab when I get out of college because in all honesty I know I need it. Anyway I'm taking a bow from Julie and refusing to drive drunk anywhere anytime no if's and's or but's. I always agree to drive because I'm the one who's already gotten in trouble for it but that's the exact reason why I should be the LAST to offer. Friends, I'm sorry but from now on, we're cabbing it.
3.) Finally and this one is a kicker. I want to find a religion. I want to read books and understand and find something, anything, to believe in. My lack of faith in it's full potential is horrific. I feel as though if I had a purpose my life could be driven. Perhaps I'll simply combine everything together and create my own little universal truths.
It's scary that in a year and a half I'll be in the real world, with real people, with a real apartment that I'll really pay for myself. I'm not ready, I'm not an adult I'm still a kid at heart and perhaps it was my late blooming with the drinking smoking sex stuff that made me that way. Or my parents babying me my whole life. Or them hiding everything from me and being completely disconnected from me. I am an extrovert and my parents are both introverts...Do you understand the problem? But it's time I take responsibility and be a better person. Stop being so fucking selfish and self loathing.
There we have it. The cy resolution. Nicer family, alive driving, and religious truths. I think they're perfect, and the good thing is that I truly believe in them. I need to focus, set my eye on the world and go for it.
New years resolutions are boring and tired. I could lose weight...I could stop smoking. But cliche isn't really my thing. I'd like to do more for my life than just minor fix ups that will only last a mere 2 months tops. I've decided to make my resolutions my own and not the rest of the populations. In one year I'd like to accomplish...drum roll if you'd like...
1.) Be kinder to my parents...It's a little tiring to always bicker with them. They gave me life and a good one at that and I really do take all they do for granted. My mom misses me a lot and I'm such a bitch that I cry when I find out that I might be stuck with her for another week, It's not her though, it's colorado but still, my mom should be way more important to me than some parties in orlando. Case closed, Mom and Dad...I love you with all my heart really...and though family ties have not exactly been knotted by a boy scout they are still important to me.
2.) Stop drinking and driving. I know it's really bad and I've been lucky the past two times and thank god that I didn't get another one or worse, into an accident. It's not safe. I should try and stop drinking but I know that wont happen. Sometimes I consider asking my parents to send me to rehab when I get out of college because in all honesty I know I need it. Anyway I'm taking a bow from Julie and refusing to drive drunk anywhere anytime no if's and's or but's. I always agree to drive because I'm the one who's already gotten in trouble for it but that's the exact reason why I should be the LAST to offer. Friends, I'm sorry but from now on, we're cabbing it.
3.) Finally and this one is a kicker. I want to find a religion. I want to read books and understand and find something, anything, to believe in. My lack of faith in it's full potential is horrific. I feel as though if I had a purpose my life could be driven. Perhaps I'll simply combine everything together and create my own little universal truths.
It's scary that in a year and a half I'll be in the real world, with real people, with a real apartment that I'll really pay for myself. I'm not ready, I'm not an adult I'm still a kid at heart and perhaps it was my late blooming with the drinking smoking sex stuff that made me that way. Or my parents babying me my whole life. Or them hiding everything from me and being completely disconnected from me. I am an extrovert and my parents are both introverts...Do you understand the problem? But it's time I take responsibility and be a better person. Stop being so fucking selfish and self loathing.
There we have it. The cy resolution. Nicer family, alive driving, and religious truths. I think they're perfect, and the good thing is that I truly believe in them. I need to focus, set my eye on the world and go for it.