Dumby

[toast_grotesque]

Back from Canada/Alaska.
It was so great...to be so dependent.
I don't think I want to be an independent woman..I think it's just etched into my mind as the thing in which I must do.
If I were really easy to love..it'd be cool..because then I'd have someone to support me the rest of my life while I curl up in their arms and under their chin...
Alas, Lew is unlovable.

Anyway.
So, now that I'm back I have to reincoorperate the fact that..I cannot keep myself and people around me away from the rest of the world.
This fact really..assaults me.
God, I wish..I could just have people.
They're mine. They don't talk, or look at me, or do anything without me..either saying they could, or being there.

And I'd get to whip them if they misbehave.
With one of those branches that is beggining to shread..

I haven't gone home yet.
I have absolutely no urge to return to my life, my friends, my work, my family.

Would it be possible to be a wanderer and dependent?
Yea, probably not.

I'm going to go sacrafice myself to the gods of blackened lungs.