(no subject)
i give up. why can't people see i mean well??? some people hate me for my honesty but how can you have any kind of relationship w/o it? i don't know how. i appreciate honesty, i appreciate it when they really truly tell the truth... i try to help, i try to console, but it all ends up exploding in my face. caring is my worst attribute and i am going to stop crying and get a grip for everything in life. i really need to change. i am unsatisfactory this way. i want to be helpful, and nice. well, i say screw it. i face facts. and lets face it, not many appreciate me trying to make things better or being nice. to all those people who talk behind my back, smirk at me falling, hate me and don't say goodbye, just shove off. get a grip. SMACK. thats the sign of reality slapping you across the face. hurts doesn't it? good. thats what most face each day, including me. why the fuck am i writing this on livejournal??? spilling my thoughts for all to read?~??~?~ i still don't exactly know why- o yeah, because i want people to talk to me and comfort me. see? even i want pity. and i hate that.